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On the Buses (set in this area)


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No, not the old TV series (and spin-off films), but you may have noticed some buses have a little story on the back. I wondered which of these stories never made it on to the roads and came up with the following:

 

Karen is hooked. She’s reading a book she just can’t put down. She reads it everywhere; in bed, at the breakfast table and on the loo. She’s so engrossed in it that she doesn’t realise she’s on a bus. Oh dear. Oh dear. Still, I suppose the other passengers will get used to the smell and there are plenty of laundrettes.

 

Kyle likes to keep abreast of what’s happening. He’s busy texting his mates and checking on facebokk Kyle’s driving this bus. Keep your distance.

 

Danny is a faded pop star. He’s just on his way home from celebrating the release of his latest single. He’s drunk a lot and he is really hoping for a Christmas number one soon.

 

Linda is studying at Central University. She asked her lecturer for a double entendre and he gave her one.

 

Elsie loves the soaps. She has a huge collection in her bathroom cupboard, but she’s not averse to the odd dirty weekend away a Bridlington.

 

Sonia is always spending her money. Last week she bought herself a new top. Now she’s wondering if it will go with the whip she bought the week before.

 

Freddy loves kippers. But thanks to recent health legislation, he’s no longer allowed to go upstairs on the bus and smoke them.

 

Donald has invited his mother-in-law over for Christmas lunch. He’s bought her a new chair and he’s hoping his wife will let him plug it in.

 

Brian is coming home from the abattoir. He’s bought a load of offal. Every Christmas he decorates the outside of his home with lights.

 

Robert intended going to the butcher to buy a duck for his Christmas dinner, but changed his mind when he saw the size of the bill.

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Did you know Stan Butler was the first person to use a cashpoint in the UK.

 

T'ol Reg Varney was the same in every role.Remember the Rag Trade.Olive was really good looking in the flesh but her make -up downpl ayed her good looks.Blakey did a stint in Summer Wine,and Doris Hare was a life-long actress.

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T'ol Reg Varney was the same in every role.Remember the Rag Trade.Olive was really good looking in the flesh but her make -up downpl ayed her good looks.Blakey did a stint in Summer Wine,and Doris Hare was a life-long actress.

 

I don't know how Olive ever put up with Arthur, all he ever did was call her a "stupid great fat lump", something like doesn't do much for a woman's confidence..

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Did you know Stan Butler was the first person to use a cashpoint in the UK.

 

Reg Varney was also the first choice to play Del Boy in Only Fools and Horses.

Luckily for us he was too busy to take it.

So it went to David Jason, and the rest is comedy history.

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I don't know how Olive ever put up with Arthur, all he ever did was call her a "stupid great fat lump", something like doesn't do much for a woman's confidence..

 

I dont know how they all lived in that house either, and Stan on only his busdrivers money.

It must have been the first reality show ever, dont you think.

But then again, they may have been actors, playing a part.

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I dont understand the point of this thread.

 

No, not the old TV series (and spin-off films), but you may have noticed some buses have a little story on the back.

 

Yes, I have noticed them.

 

I wondered which of these stories never made it on to the roads and came up with the following:

 

Eh?? :confused::huh::help:

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