Hopman Posted January 12, 2008 Share Posted January 12, 2008 Shiv’ring in the freezing dark, Grimacing against the cold wind, Stamping feet in common time Staccato teeth chatter. Better to stay calm by fireside And hear the rain cascade in torrents. Icy walks with slow steps Fearing the fall. So tread with care. Step out boldly, but fall to the ground Run on the ice crush crystals underfoot. Feel the wind from all corners And know the joy of winter. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
coyleys Posted January 13, 2008 Share Posted January 13, 2008 Well Hopman you surprise me, is there no end to your talents? That was really good. Top Man. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Malanimal Posted January 16, 2008 Share Posted January 16, 2008 That is a proper lovely poem, agreed with Coyleys, really good stuff. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stuartryder Posted January 17, 2008 Share Posted January 17, 2008 "staccato... chatter" is tautological - overdoing it a bit. Vs. 2 and 3 seem to contradict each other! Regards Stuart Shiv’ring in the freezing dark, Grimacing against the cold wind, Stamping feet in common time Staccato teeth chatter. Better to stay calm by fireside And hear the rain cascade in torrents. Icy walks with slow steps Fearing the fall. So tread with care. Step out boldly, but fall to the ground Run on the ice crush crystals underfoot. Feel the wind from all corners And know the joy of winter. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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