Eating disorders [bulimia and anorexia]

[sam1984]

Thanks Mick, i agree with that! xxx

[Tracie]

Originally posted by Strix

The thing that isn't immediately obvious to non-sufferers is that the disorder often isn't driven by food.

 

Bulemia is often a phsychological control defence and anorexia is the revulsion of food brought on by stress. Just to be really confusing, self image can be part of the real problem, though tackling other areas of dissatisfaction in somebody's life will bring about the cure - the 'eating disorder' curing itself in the process.

 

This is so true. Anorexia and bulimia are emotional illness - In a sense, eating disorders are the sufferers solution to a problem, rather than being the problem itself. Very rarely is the disorder driven only by the desire to be thin. I remember hearing a speaker some months ago who described anorexia/bulimia as a means of substituting life's troubles and its unwieldiness for an easier state of being - not neccesary death, but a state close to it. Eating disorders allow those prople who, for whatever reason, can't deal with the world to slowly remove huge chunks of time - months, even years; during which sufferers can live 'safely' in this familar, unworldly state. Recovery is equally complex and individual - its not simply a matter of gaining the weight back, as some people may believe.

 

Your site is good Sam, I've been wanting someone to bring up something like this on the forum for ages, but I was too nervous to do so myself

[sam1984]

Thanks to everyone who replied or joined the site!

I really hope this thread has helped some of you and will continue to do so.

 

If anybody knows anybody that might find this helpful, please pass it on.

 

Thanks Sam xxx

[espadrille]

Again, I found this old thread which i know will be out of date, but I guess the problem is still with us. SYEDA do a great job in Sheffield with (as usual) very little funding.

Do you know anyone who is affected by an eating disorder?

[*Peaches*]

I was diagnosed anorexic many years ago, and sometimes I do still wonder if they were right. I never used to feel hungry, and the thought of eating used to make me feel sick because of the way food made me feel (bloated, even more sick) it also used to cause me major issues in the loo department, many days I used to get by on a slice of toast mum forced me to take to school with me, often only had a bite as I was walking out the door, the rest went in the hedge. The rest of the day I filled myself on drink and the odd chocolate bar.

[*carrie*]

What about the eating disorders that don't fit into the anorexia/bulimia boxes? I think disordered eating in general is such a common thing, people forget it's an illness. I had something like this a few years ago. I'd put weight on and went to see a nurse as you do to get contraceptive pills, knowing I was heavy and being a little sensitive about it. She was so cutting, it triggered off a diet that went from healthy and steady weight loss to obsessive eating habits. I stopped eating proper meals and often ate cereal for three meals a day, measuring food and obsession over counting 'points' to the point where all day I had a constant conversation in my head relating to how many 'points' I had and trying to not feel guilty. I found exercise as a way of getting rid of more calories until I had dropped 4/5 dress sizes or more in just over as many months.

 

People constantly complemented me because I didn't 'look like someone with an eating disorder'. I'm 5 ft 6/7 and at my lowest, a 6-8 so I looked very slim but not bony, unless you touched me and felt them. I was super-toned from the obsessive exercise and had offers of modelling work. But inside I was such a mess that whenever I looked in the mirror, I saw the 'fat' me and was permanently feeling myself for bits I could lose. Feeling for the bones became a comfort thing. Now and then, my brain let me see how skinny I really was, and it shocked me into disbelief and soon enough it was back to 'fat' mode. Like living in a hall of mirrors at the funfair, really.

 

Anyway, what I was going to say was that, apart from at the beginning, it was never about weight. It was about control and anxiety. I had just moved to uni, got myself a terrible boyfriend and clinged to the food issue as the one steady thing in my world. Disappearing slowly was incredibly exhilarating and satisfying, and on the occassion where I was confronted with it, I would be both furious and snap and be thrilled they could see I was ill. I think I was waiting for my parents and friends to say stop... we love you how you are... but it didn't come till it was too far on for me to just stop.

 

The eating thing died its own death and became compulsive eating, from which I think I am now more or less recovered and back to an average size. The depression I suffered that came with the eating disorder out-lasted it for a lot longer, and I wouldn't wish it on anyone. The doctors were no help and on the one time I dared to ask for help, I was dismissed and this made it a lot worse, with terrible consequences.

 

I'd like to hope people reconsider their idea of what people with eating disorders 'look' like... More often than not, they look like you.

[arachnophobe]

Fantastic post Carrie, and very informative.

 

How are you now?

[*carrie*]

Fantastic post Carrie, and very informative.

 

How are you now?

 

Thanks.... I thought twice before pressing the 'submit' button, but then I figured the people who judge you on such matters aren't people I'd care for anyhow.

 

I'm alright, thanks I still have food 'issues', but I think it's finding the elusive balanced approach to food I find difficult, but I think this might take some time and be an ongoing thing, as with anyone who has food-related anxiety. I don't know about anyone else who's felt like this, but I have my moments where I wish to 'borrow' my illness back for a quick-fix diet solution lol. But I know full well all the unwanted side-affects of doing so, and have held back.

 

For people who have been through this and are still going through this, I think the hardest thing to accept is that other people, on the whole, don't judge you on the basis of body image. Just because we have a preoccupation with it, doesn't mean they do and just because someone looks at you, it's not because you're the fattest/ugliest thing on the planet! I think other people are far more accepting of my flaws than I am.

[red_hearts]

My biggest fear with her is that she actually gets praise for being - so slim and toned and gets alot of looks and admiring stares. I am scared that she (has admitted this) rejoices in this and is and will make her be less inclined to stop.

 

I find this quite frightening as well, as I have a friend with a similar problem. People comment on how nice she looks when she is thin, when she clearly looks drained and ill. I worry that saying anything might decrease her self-esteem further and might make the problem worse or will make her think about her weight more.

 

I find the website quite informative as it explains the effects of the illness in a clear way. It is a good way of sharing experiences.. My only concern is that people with eating disorders sometimes make each other worse, because they all have a preoccupation with food.

[arachnophobe]

Thanks.... I thought twice before pressing the 'submit' button, but then I figured the people who judge you on such matters aren't people I'd care for anyhow.

 

I'm alright, thanks I still have food 'issues', but I think it's finding the elusive balanced approach to food I find difficult, but I think this might take some time and be an ongoing thing, as with anyone who has food-related anxiety. I don't know about anyone else who's felt like this, but I have my moments where I wish to 'borrow' my illness back for a quick-fix diet solution lol. But I know full well all the unwanted side-affects of doing so, and have held back.

 

For people who have been through this and are still going through this, I think the hardest thing to accept is that other people, on the whole, don't judge you on the basis of body image. Just because we have a preoccupation with it, doesn't mean they do and just because someone looks at you, it's not because you're the fattest/ugliest thing on the planet! I think other people are far more accepting of my flaws than I am.

 

Very true!

 

I'm glad to hear things are looking up- it's sounds as though you have a very good attitude to recovery, and as with any illness/ disorder, it takes time.