Out on a Rail

[Falls]

Here is another tale from the family archives.

 

Out on a Rail.

 

Hope you find it amusing.

[Mantaspook]

Hi Falls,

 

Thanks for sharing that story, there are some very interesting insights into 'times gone by.'

 

These days we would never associate shop fitting and funerals being done by one company.

 

The only section that could do with some attention is this one:

 

“Uncle, Wilfred! That’s an awfully big load for me to take down to Tinsley. Shouldn’t it be going on the wagon with Shemp or one of the other horses?”

 

“I’m sorry Bertram!! (Wilfred always used his full name) It’s needed at the work site as soon as possible. As for horses, they are being groomed right now and can’t be spared. You haven’t forgotten that we have a funeral this morning and another tomorrow. Anyway, we’ll give you a push to get you started.”

 

Apart from the couple of commas & exclamation marks that could do with pruning the dialogue may be better if it reflected the Yorkshire dialect that the locals use later on in the story.

(That was very well done. )

 

Also if it was broken down into smaller sentences the exchange between them would be more realistic.

 

I'd consider deleting the section contained within brackets; it looks out of place within the dialogue, it adds a mild distraction but it is the only real hiccup. Generally your story style just rolls along as smoothly as the cart in the tracks, a very pleasant & entertaining story.

 

I really liked the bit about his glasses been steamed up 'like chip shop windows' and the tram drivers chagrin at Bert's antics.

 

Another classic Falls story.

 

 

 

PS A couple of very minor points to address in the edit stage. You've probably already spotted them:

 

"perspiring profusely." - doesn’t roll off the tongue; 'sweating' is more accurate & concise.

 

"Attercliffe Common (road)" - lose the brackets 'The Attercliffe Common road' is better; we both know this is not strictly accurate but it does give a non local reader a clearer idea that it is a road and not a common.

 

extra hyphens

 

"make-out" should be 'make out'

 

"un-notice" should be 'unnoticed'

[Hopman]

I wonder if something similar happened a few years ago when the City Hall piano was moved from the Octagon back to the City Hall?

[sauerkraut]

Thanks for another entertaining story, Falls. I always enjoy reading your family anecdotes

 

One dense question: what are granite sets?

[Falls]

Thanks for another entertaining story, Falls. I always enjoy reading your family anecdotes

 

One dense question: what are granite sets?

 

Hello,

 

Granite Sets were blocks of stone used to form the road surface before tarmacadam (asphalt ) was developed. Granite was used on the main roads in cities for its hard wearing capability, while side streets were often paved with the softer sandstone. The stones were set out, sometimes in patterns, on a bed of compacted granular material and then the gaps between the stones filled with hot tar.

 

In the days of horse drawn transport, the steel rims on the wagon wheels made a terrible noise crossing stone sets. To counteract this, sections of road outside churches, hospitals and other public buildings were paved with wood instead of stone. This did dampen the sound but the wooden blocks were treacherous when wet.

 

Regards

[sauerkraut]

Interesting info; thank you, Falls. One learns something new every day

[Ron Blanco]

Nice one Falls. I really liked the dialect in your story.

 

It reminds me of when I was cycling through Sheffield and got my wheel stuck in a tram groove - before I knew it I was in Middlewood!

 

But though trams can be a nuisance to some people, e.g. Bert, I think they are the way forward. I live in Nottingham now and the tram here is much better than bus or car.

 

It's quick, because it doesn't get held up in traffic. It's also quick to get on and off as a conductor collects the fares.

It's reliable, because it doesn't have unexpected hold ups.

It's comfortable, because it's more spacious, air-conditioned and travels in a straight line.

 

I'm convinced that Trams are the way forward.

 

Having said that, Trams in Sheffield don't seem quite so effective for some reason. Do you think it's because too many of the routes are shared with buses and cars?

[coyleys]

Nice one Falls, I got there eventually.

 

It’s nice to see your back to your usually style of informative tales. I always get a bit of a nostalgic kick when reading your stories, this was a bit before my time, but I do remember the tram lines, and same as Ron I often got the pushbike stuck in the tracks, slapstick comes to mind, the likes of Chaplin, Keaton, Laurel and Hardy and of course Young Blanco.

 

Also it remind me of the last days of school –yes, I did go to school, and no, It wasn’t approved – this chap came round, careers officer, I think was his title, I wanted to be a joiner but all he had on the cards was coffin maker. After the usual jibe’s from my mate’s “It’s a dying trade and so on” I decided to go alone and got an apprenticeship at Ralf Hill’s on Loxley Rd. (one of my many apprenticeships may I add) This job didn’t last long, for I thought College was an extension of school. I was expelled in the first year for annihilating a dumbwaiter, but that’s another story.

Anyway, great stuff Fall’s, keep-em coming.

[Mantaspook]

I was expelled in the first year for annihilating a dumbwaiter

 

Why'd you do that? Did he ask for a tip?

[coyleys]

Why'd you do that? Did he ask for a tip?

 

What in Braille.

Tipping the waiter reminds me of that link you once posted, Mantas, I still have it on favourites.

 

 

Or in this case, it was tipping the delivery boy.