Funny things kids say

[xfox3x]

One Christmas, when my son was about 7, I took him to the doctors. It was a very big doctors practice, with a huge waiting room, serving several doctors, and it was very busy, so there were a lot of people waiting.

 

He was always very chatty, and was asking all the people waiting what their name was. There was an elderly gentleman sat next to me, and he told my son his name was Joseph. The lady sat next to my son hold him her name was Mary. I just knew what was coming next - and was wishing the ground to open up and swallow me - "Are you a virgin then Mary?"

 

This is the honest truth!

 

OMG...me n OH are killing ourselves at that one!

[MonkeyLover]

My son was stopping the night at his Nans for the first time.

 

He woke her up at 3 O'clock in the morning to ask whether the water went round clockwise or anti-clockwise down the plughole when the plug is pulled out. My Mum told him, blearily-eyed, that she didn't know, and that they would try it in the morning when he had his bath.

 

"Oh, its ok Nan, I know the answer, just wanted to know if you did or not"

:hihi:

[MonkeyLover]

In the days of very cheap bus fares, my son and I were on our way to town on the bus, when a huge fat bloke waddled on and took up two seats at the front of the bus.

 

Thoughtfully, my son asked what the bus fare was for me (I think it was about 15p), and what the busfare was for himself (5p I think).

 

Two minutes later - "I bet that bloke pays about £3.50"

[MonkeyLover]

..lol. lovin this thread

 

Aw, thank you!

[MonkeyLover]

I once heard of a school nativity play, where the kids were told to more or less make up their own script as they went along.

 

Joseph came home from work and asked Mary if baby Jesus had been a good boy. - Mary repled - "No, he's been a little bu@@er all day!"

[xfox3x]

I went shopping with my daughter and grandchildren who were about 5 and 4 at the time.

I was getting more and more upset because I was feeling fat and frumpy and nothing looked right.

I stomped off saying 'I'm going to look in the fat ladies section'.

As I made my way across the shop I heard a little voice shout..'You're not fat grandma...you're ugly'.

Turning round I saw my daughter hissing 'I said tell her she's not fat ...she's cuddly'

[hennypenny]

When one of my son's friends stayed over when he was about 7 the conversation went like this:-

 

him - What is a boo?

me - I am not sure, where have you heard of it?

him - well dad said he was going out to buy some boos and I wondered what they were?

[MonkeyLover]

When one of my son's friends stayed over when he was about 7 the conversation went like this:-

 

him - What is a boo?

me - I am not sure, where have you heard of it?

him - well dad said he was going out to buy some boos and I wondered what they were?

 

:hihi:

[Mathom]

Mine can't say 'fork' correctly, so when he goes into the kitchen and tries to get in the cutlery drawer for a fork to eat with, he yells "fok! fok! fok!" I currently daren't take him into any cafes.

[Tess]

My five year old brother wakes me up at 7:15 at weekends. I said to him, "Alfie, don't you know what a lie-in is?" and he replied with, "yes I do, it lives in the jungle and goes Rar!"

 

A few days later my mum was on the phone talking about how there is no staple foods left in the shops due to the snow. He wanders in and says, "Staples?! Staples in a shop?! Baby Jesus was born in a Staple.."

 

Bless.