maidinsheff Posted February 27, 2010 Share Posted February 27, 2010 http://sheffieldwriters.ath.cx/SFStoryArchive/1267281295.dot February subject of Politics and Religion - er don't know much about either - however it did inspire the uploaded poem. Don't know whether it is any good as I am not much of a poet. Any feedback most welcome Maidinsheff Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daveybee Posted February 28, 2010 Share Posted February 28, 2010 Maidinsheff, while I enjoyed your poem, sadly I'm not qualified to comment. I did wonder if you were writing from experience, it sounds very much so. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ron Blanco Posted March 1, 2010 Share Posted March 1, 2010 Hi Maid, I also enjoyed it. I thought it was quite accessible, so hopefully even non-poetic people like myself can enjoy it. I particularly enjoyed the first verse, which seemed to encapsulate the 'loss' felt by the wife. I thought that some of the phrases, such as "his absence drifts like vapour..." were excellent. The second verse seemed to express some bitterness / resentment felt by the mother. I wasn't sure what was meant by 'experimental grief' or 'ambiguous face', so that section wasn't as powerful for me. I'd be interested to know if those descriptions do resonate with other readers. I thought the final verse rounded it off nicely. The actions of 'letting go' were described nicely, but I did wonder if the difficulty of doing so could have been emphasised more. I think it is the sort of poem that may stay with me for a while, Thanks for posting Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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