Jabberwocky Posted March 30, 2010 Share Posted March 30, 2010 This is an appeal on behalf of the Very Gormless. Do you suffer from, or know someone who suffers from Gormlessness? Each year more than 60,000 people suffer from this malady, either directly or indirectly, all through the spectrum of gormlessness, from the slightly dense, all the way to the most extreme case which is known as Terminal Gormlessness. My partner suffers from a form of this ailment, known as "Bloody silly buggeritis" and often waits for anything up to 90 seconds while her brain processes a simple question before replying. Why, this very morning I asked her what she wanted from the shops, and in the time she processed that simple question, I had made a cup of coffee, rolled myself a cig and smoked it. And I STILL had to wait for the bloody reply. And she STILL changed her mind and phoned me AFTER Id bought the stuff she decided she DIDNT want, then told me off for getting it! In an attempt to raise funds for the Gormless, I`m starting a sponsored thread, all monies made will go to providing shock collars for the Gormless so their loved ones can put a bolt or two of electricity through them at their most Gormless times. So, to raise funds, please give examples of gormlessness on this thread. Thank you, from the Lets Eradicate Gormlessness Society . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cressida Posted March 30, 2010 Share Posted March 30, 2010 Mine is the other way round, I gave someone £20 to get me a fluorescent round tube for the kitchen on the understanding that he would put towards it to get the shade as well - he came back with just the tube and now has to pay more for the shade, that's if he can get one to fit Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gormenghast Posted March 30, 2010 Share Posted March 30, 2010 This is an appeal on behalf of the Very Gormless. Do you suffer from, or know someone who suffers from Gormlessness? Thank you, from the Lets Eradicate Gormlessness Society . Oi! Are you getting at me? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jabberwocky Posted March 30, 2010 Author Share Posted March 30, 2010 Oi! Are you getting at me? If you count yourself among the unfortunate few who are within the Gormlessness spectrum then this thread is not against you, its FOR you. Im lobbying Westminster to make Gormo-phobia a hate crime! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jabberwocky Posted March 30, 2010 Author Share Posted March 30, 2010 I just fell into the "Ever so moderately Gormless" category about an hour ago. The OH made two pasties yesterday, one from chicken and mushroom for her and one with steak and kidney for me. The despises steak and kidney with a passion and... I ate the Chicken and mushroom one... She went bonkers with me and I tried to explain that I made a simple mistake but she wont have it, she`s now convinced that I`m gormless. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ksheff2 Posted March 30, 2010 Share Posted March 30, 2010 Ok, I admit it! Im gormless. There are too many instances to mention....just send me the bloody collar Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alcoblog Posted March 30, 2010 Share Posted March 30, 2010 This is an appeal on behalf of the Very Gormless. Do you suffer from, or know someone who suffers from Gormlessness? Each year more than 60,000 people suffer from this malady, either directly or indirectly, all through the spectrum of gormlessness, from the slightly dense, all the way to the most extreme case which is known as Terminal Gormlessness. My partner suffers from a form of this ailment, known as "Bloody silly buggeritis" and often waits for anything up to 90 seconds while her brain processes a simple question before replying. Why, this very morning I asked her what she wanted from the shops, and in the time she processed that simple question, I had made a cup of coffee, rolled myself a cig and smoked it. And I STILL had to wait for the bloody reply. And she STILL changed her mind and phoned me AFTER Id bought the stuff she decided she DIDNT want, then told me off for getting it! In an attempt to raise funds for the Gormless, I`m starting a sponsored thread, all monies made will go to providing shock collars for the Gormless so their loved ones can put a bolt or two of electricity through them at their most Gormless times. So, to raise funds, please give examples of gormlessness on this thread. I, at my special scientific facility have invented a state of the art machine called a 'gormlessometer' (this of course is retro engineered from the gormometer found at the site of the 1947 Roswell incident) It's calibrated to even measure microgorms and when fully up and running will even measure nanogorms! Maybe your O/H could be used as a guinea pig for calibration purposes? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mojo1 Posted March 30, 2010 Share Posted March 30, 2010 My OH is pretty gormless, but only since meeting me it seems. He frequently looses the power of speech, giggles like a girl for no real reason and has been asked if he's having some kind of breakdown. The most gormless thing he's done though is to try and take on our very own dragon ladies, Mort and Dozy in some kind of battle of wits and wills... he's not having much luck, but still he persists. Does that make him king of the gormless people? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gormenghast Posted March 30, 2010 Share Posted March 30, 2010 I, at my special scientific facility have invented a state of the art machine called a 'gormlessometer' (this of course is retro engineered from the gormometer found at the site of the 1947 Roswell incident) It's calibrated to even measure microgorms and when fully up and running will even measure nanogorms! Maybe your O/H could be used as a guinea pig for calibration purposes? I'm aghast. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jabberwocky Posted March 30, 2010 Author Share Posted March 30, 2010 My OH is pretty gormless, but only since meeting me it seems. He frequently looses the power of speech, giggles like a girl for no real reason and has been asked if he's having some kind of breakdown. The most gormless thing he's done though is to try and take on our very own dragon ladies, Mort and Dozy in some kind of battle of wits and wills... he's not having much luck, but still he persists. Does that make him king of the gormless people? Wit..? They have wit...? Damn I never noti.... Damn... wheres the delete key? QUICK BEFORE THEY SEE THAT!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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