Jabberwocky Posted March 30, 2010 Share Posted March 30, 2010 I went to the shops this morning and as I was wending my merry way, gazing at the spring daffodils that flitted oer the hills and stuff, a friend passed me in his car. He honked his horn at me and almost gave me quite an interesting heart attack and instinctively I span round and shot him the rods... then realised it was my buddy and quickly changed the two finger wave into a reverse hand one. The reason I shot him the rods (Apart from the fact that I`m a thug and was hoping for a rumble in the street) is because of his horn. Now, I`ve never liked my mates horn, its always been one of those huge thrusting ones that rams itself down your throat at a moments notice, and his car- a BMW is an aggressive looking thing. But enough about my buddies sexual organs and his car, lets get back to the topic of car horns. It dawned on me that most horns are aggressive sounding and decided it was time for a bit of a change. For example, why cant we have nicer horns that play a little tune- no not la cucaracha or whatever the hell its called, but something like Greensleeves or whatever the hell THATS called. Maybe a bit of opera or the crazy frog... I wonder how many instances of road rage have been triggered from an innocent beep of a horn. Could we possibly see download sites in the future where people can download nicer sounding horns or maybe have different horns for different occasions, for instance, a nice bing bong doorbell sound for beeping a hello at friends, or a banshee howl that promises a swift and messy death for the motorist in front if he doesnt move his arris fast enough when the light turns green...? Or maybe a silent one for the selfish bas... little tinkers who like to sound their horn outside your house at midnight... So, poppets. Horns. What would YOU do about them? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bozo Posted March 30, 2010 Share Posted March 30, 2010 For example, why cant we have nicer horns that play a little tune- no not la cucaracha or whatever the hell its called, but something like Greensleeves or whatever the hell THATS called. yes I can see that now, Bozo junior hearing Greensleaves, rushing out thinking an ice cream van is in vicinity only to find assorted limbs and bicycle parts sticking out from beneath a ford mondeo or whatever... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jabberwocky Posted March 30, 2010 Author Share Posted March 30, 2010 yes I can see that now, Bozo junior hearing Greensleaves, rushing out thinking an ice cream van is in vicinity only to find assorted limbs and bicycle parts sticking out from beneath a ford mondeo or whatever... Ice cream vans too. They could be standardised just to play one tune or sound... maybe Just a loud voice screaming "ICE CREAM! COME N GET YER ICE CREAM, YER LITTLE BUGGERS!" Bus bells! What about bus bells? Cant we have them making a fart sound instead of the buzz or bell that rings when you push the button? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bozo Posted March 30, 2010 Share Posted March 30, 2010 Ice cream vans too. They could be standardised just to play one tune or sound... maybe Just a loud voice screaming "ICE CREAM! COME N GET YER ICE CREAM, YER LITTLE BUGGERS!" I think the guy in Hillsborough Park has already got copyright on that one.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alchresearch Posted March 30, 2010 Share Posted March 30, 2010 In the days when mobile CBs were popular we used to drive round estates, key up the mike and play "Greensleeves" on a little Casio keyboard, relayed through the PA speaker! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bendyman Posted March 30, 2010 Share Posted March 30, 2010 early warning sounds when jahova witness comes knockin:hihi: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jabberwocky Posted March 30, 2010 Author Share Posted March 30, 2010 early warning sounds when jahova witness comes knockin:hihi: In my house the early warning sounds are the land mines I planted up the front garden path going off! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bendyman Posted March 30, 2010 Share Posted March 30, 2010 In my house the early warning sounds are the land mines I planted up the front garden path going off! how do you get rid of them, without being horrible, Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jabberwocky Posted March 30, 2010 Author Share Posted March 30, 2010 how do you get rid of them, without being horrible, That WAS me being nice! If I wanted to be horrible Id let my OH talk to them. That`d teach the buggers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DragonofAna Posted March 30, 2010 Share Posted March 30, 2010 The purpose of having a horn on the car, and the only reason it should be used, is to alert other road users of your presence - usually in order to prevent an accident, such as if someone is likely to reverse into you. Having said that I am seriously contemplating getting air horns fitted to my Mondeo that would give the london symphony orchestra a run for their money, and then some. Why the hell the Mondeo has this pathetic strangled mouse squeek is beyond me. Neither use nor blooming argument. As for the later comments about Jehovahs witnesses calling - I just tell them I am happy being a witch. Some then stay for a nice conversation about witchcraft, or run a mile. Either way - no skin off my nose. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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