A lighthearted look at other ways of taxing us.

[Waltheof]

A tax on every time the words "innit" or "whatever" are used in colloquial conversation. Naturally everyone will have to keep a notebook and note every occurrence and report these so that the tax can be levied equally on all.

[donuticus]

Single Man Tax

 

Was discussing interior design yesterday and the talk moved to how single blokes always have bloody odd things in their homes as well as getting into bad habits when left to themselves.

 

I remember finding one of those "table football" things in a perfectly normal looking man's bedroom (civil servant, incidentally ). Someone I knew had a picture of Wayne Rooney above his bed. Thirty year old doctor. Nice .

 

So I think single men shouldn't be allowed to live on their own, and the money they would be paying on rent/mortgage will go to the Treasury.

 

The men will be put into something like boarding school dormitories where they can be punished for whatever bad habits they have that made them single in the first place. They can only move out and stop paying the Single Man Tax when they have earned the love of a good woman.

 

I have an air hockey table in my flat. Table football is so passe.

[Darth Vader]

Chocolate tax.

In fact tax everything in the supermarket with more than 300 calories until the pips squeak.

That'll help the fatties.

 

You'd have to balance that with a laxative tax, to help the skinnies, of course.