medusa Posted June 4, 2010 Share Posted June 4, 2010 No, you didn't. You answered a question regarding a hypothetical situation where you would try to discourage a 12-year-old from having sex. I asked a different question. Not to mention you completely disregarded the majority of my first post. It seems that you don't want to listen to what other people have to say, because you don't want to be wrong and you want to be the best parent you can be, I get it, but you're not doing yourself or your daughter any favours. And beyond saying that he'd talk to said hypothetical girl he has also failed to answer my questions. Falpere, if you're of the belief that you can dissuade any teen from doing something just by talking to them then I fear you have a great many things that will come as a big shock to you! Real life plans deal with the teens whom you can't persuade and who will do what they want regardless of what is said to them. I'd really like to know how you'd handle them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missflirtuk Posted June 4, 2010 Share Posted June 4, 2010 Apologies- I have never had a contraceptive implant because it came out after I had to stop hormonal contraception because of my tumour and so I guess I missed out on that piece of information. I'm going to amend my post just in case anyone reads it and takes it as gospel. It's ok . I really wish I had not had this is as I have had no end of problems with it. Mood swings, depression, feel really tired even after a good nights sleep, seem to constantly be on a period, either red blood or brown blood (sorry for the tmi). But I have put up with it as the pill makes me feel sick and when I try to swallow it, it seems to get lodged in my throat . So I am trying to stick to this for the 3 years and hope that maybe my body will get used to it. My aunty is on her 2nd rod now. She had no problems at all with it. Wish I had no problems with it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
espadrille Posted June 5, 2010 Share Posted June 5, 2010 The decision to go to the GP instead of the parent has already be made by the girl NOT the GP. The girl chose to go to the GP- the GP didn't go to the girl:confused: I think this post thankfully hits the nail on the head. The girl has chosen to go to the GP and have a discussion with him/her. The GP and the girl have come to an agreement about what is in the best interest of the girl, taking everything in to account. Teenagers are at an age where they often do not want to discuss everything with their parents( especially issues like this with their Dad, but will discuss with their peers and even sometimes their peers parents.At the age of 14, particularly girls are quite mature and will want to feel that they can make decisions based on their own judgement. It is hard as a parent to accept this but again there are many issues that we have as parents that we find very hard to accept. I was incredulous when I found that my 15 year old son was smoking. Illegal yes but it happens and of course all I could think of was what he was doing to his body. He is 20 and is still smoking. No one in our family smokes but what can I do about that.He made a decision when he was young and no matter what we have tried to do or say has made any difference. That is the part of parenting that we have to accept. Our children often do not do what we want them to. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cyclone Posted June 5, 2010 Share Posted June 5, 2010 Talking I expect. Although obviously sex would have been talked about before. I certainly wouldn't be too upset to post my real feelings as you claimed. Getting in that state doesn't help anyone and certainly won't help the communication between yourself and your daughter. Of course at 14 you must still think she's nearly as stupid as a 12 year old and barely capable of foreseeing the consequences of obvious things. It's a wonder she's managed to convince a GP she was competent enough to consent to the procedure, or that she thought far enough ahead to want it. Wrong. try again. Maybe you could try to use whole sentences. Maybe get your daughter to help you out. That is if she's so much smarter than a 12 year old. Which bit of that do you think was wrong, and why. Unluckily for you in any kind of debate you're expected to provide reasoning when you want to declare that something is wrong, and even a correct interpretation if one exists. You could start by just being clear about what you think is wrong though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daven Posted June 5, 2010 Share Posted June 5, 2010 Maybe you could try to use whole sentences. Maybe get your daughter to help you out. That is if she's so much smarter than a 12 year old. Which bit of that do you think was wrong, and why. Unluckily for you in any kind of debate you're expected to provide reasoning when you want to declare that something is wrong, and even a correct interpretation if one exists. You could start by just being clear about what you think is wrong though. Falpere appears to be a man who wants to control and is unable to cope when others disagree with his opinion. I fear for his relationship with his teenage daughter since all pubescent offspring will fight against such oppression and rebellion is the most common path. Sadly, I predict a thread started in the near future by Falpere on the lines of 'my daughter has left home. I have only ever wanted what is best for her'. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
purdyamos Posted June 5, 2010 Share Posted June 5, 2010 The way I see this thread, Falpere expects the world to be as he wishes it would be, whereas others are responding to the world as it is. Try to face reality honestly is not the same thing as condoning it, which is how he's interpreted a lot of the advice here. Unfortunately, more harm overall is done by rigid idealism than honest pragmatism. Also, the law has to cover the many instances of youngsters who don't have caring or competent parents. Some people think parents should have absolute rights, which is frightening to hear, knowing what life is like from the other side. The needs of such teenagers have to be catered for for, whether you like it or not and however conscientious you believe you are personally as a parent. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
falpere Posted June 12, 2010 Author Share Posted June 12, 2010 Maybe you could try to use whole sentences. Maybe get your daughter to help you out. That is if she's so much smarter than a 12 year old. Which bit of that do you think was wrong, and why. Unluckily for you in any kind of debate you're expected to provide reasoning when you want to declare that something is wrong, and even a correct interpretation if one exists. You could start by just being clear about what you think is wrong though. Luckily for you, I am giving you the chance to re-think your answer before I point out where you went wrong. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
falpere Posted June 12, 2010 Author Share Posted June 12, 2010 And beyond saying that he'd talk to said hypothetical girl he has also failed to answer my questions. Falpere, if you're of the belief that you can dissuade any teen from doing something just by talking to them then I fear you have a great many things that will come as a big shock to you! Real life plans deal with the teens whom you can't persuade and who will do what they want regardless of what is said to them. I'd really like to know how you'd handle them. Damned if I do, Damned if I don't!! I have made it clear that I have talked to my daughter, as many poster's have advised. Seems that this is now not enough!. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
falpere Posted June 12, 2010 Author Share Posted June 12, 2010 It's ok . I really wish I had not had this is as I have had no end of problems with it. Mood swings, depression, feel really tired even after a good nights sleep, seem to constantly be on a period, either red blood or brown blood (sorry for the tmi). But I have put up with it as the pill makes me feel sick and when I try to swallow it, it seems to get lodged in my throat . So I am trying to stick to this for the 3 years and hope that maybe my body will get used to it. My aunty is on her 2nd rod now. She had no problems at all with it. Wish I had no problems with it. Hi missflirtuk. Thanks for your post. A clear example of how this treatment does have some nasty side effects for some people. Makes me shudder to think that it can be given to children. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JFKvsNixon Posted June 12, 2010 Share Posted June 12, 2010 Hi missflirtuk. Thanks for your post. A clear example of how this treatment does have some nasty side effects for some people. Makes me shudder to think that it can be given to children. Only to children that are able to make an informed consent, not any child. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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