Dont forget. Men are sometimes Victims of Domestic Violence too

[mikmouse]

Thought id save anyone else the time of starting a thread about how men are also victims of domestic violence( http://www.sheffieldforum.co.uk/showthread.php?t=594609 )

Now i realise ive got a few peoples backs up on here with my occasional bit of trolling but this is 100% genuine and deadly serious.

Ive been the victim of repeated domestic violence. Ive lost 4 teeth, got a broken nose and suffer regular pain in my happy place from all the times ive been kicked or puncned there and quite a bit more in terms of physical and emotional scars. My point is at no time did i think about leaving her as i thought it was the best for the kids to have two parents and not one.

Now that was a massive mistake as because of my actions my kids now know their dad used to be beat up by their mum.

They hate their mum and pity their dad.

So, if anyone has a partner who thinks its ok to hit or hurt you.

LEAVE!!!!

[Kthebean]

There is help for men experiencing domestic violence here:

 

http://www.mensadviceline.org.uk/mens_advice.php

 

and here:

 

http://www.mankind.org.uk/

 

and for gay men:

 

http://www.broken-rainbow.org.uk/

 

but a sad lack of local services.

[mikmouse]

The mens advice line would have been really helpful to me. Even if it was only the fact i would have had an understanding ear on the end of a phone.

Thanks for posting those links.

[EmilyM]

Female on male domestic abuse should be highlighted too - good thread.

A lot of men will keep quiet because of the social stigma, but its never right to abuse your partner. Abuse can be psychological and emotional too, its not just physical violence that people in relationships can suffer, male or female.

I'll bet the OP never retaliated because he would never hit a woman.

[mikmouse]

Female on male domestic abuse should be highlighted too - good thread.

A lot of men will keep quiet because of the social stigma, but its never right to abuse your partner. Abuse can be psychological and emotional too, its not just physical violence that people in relationships can suffer, male or female.

I'll bet the OP never retaliated because he would never hit a woman.

 

Never once. Im being honest when i say i was tempted. The day when i found my mouth full of blood and broken teeth springs to mind as being one of them but no, i never hit her back. Of course she said i did. One time we were having 'words' and i defused the situation by going for a walk only to be greeted by plod when i got home who arrested me and locked me up for the night, took dna, photos and a taped interview under caution for apparently punching her in the face (no marks tho:loopy:).

Even the copper who was a really decent fella said he knew she was full of it. Not in those words of course but unfortunatly his hands were tied.

Thanks for sticking up for me by the way EmilyM

[KamalJoe]

It should be termed as the "intension" and "capability" ability. Women have the intension but lack the ability to inflict damage, does not mean they're innocent. Also, men have the capability but not always have the intension to seriously harm, but they do.

[DragonofAna]

It should be termed as the "intension" and "capability" ability. Women have the intension but lack the ability to inflict damage, does not mean they're innocent. Also, men have the capability but not always have the intension to seriously harm, but they do.

 

Try telling that to the blokes who have had their bits cut off; been stabbed; beaten whilst asleep and so on - and that's just the physical abuse - the mental abuse is considerably worse and has a longer term affect.

Physical wounds usually heal - psychological scarring often doesn't.

[Kthebean]

It should be termed as the "intension" and "capability" ability. Women have the intension but lack the ability to inflict damage, does not mean they're innocent. Also, men have the capability but not always have the intension to seriously harm, but they do.

 

Interesting point of view.

 

I think the experts would disagree with you.

[anniec]

mik - if she beats you and your kids know and hate her for it why are you still there? I mean didn't you say in another thread you were in love with her best friend?

 

Surely you should just pack your things, you don't love her, your kids don't like how she treats you and they have pity for you because you allow it. Maybe it's just me but I think kids are happier when their parents are happy and by allowing this to continue you are teaching them that this is acceptable behaviour in a realtionship.

[skinz]

Recent american studies show that there is actually more female on male domestic violence then male on female, but that as rubydazzler says the level of violence tends to be lower (though not always of course). It also said however that women tended to use weapons more often.

 

 

I'm wondering how many of those women were the recipients of previous violence and the weapon a means of defence?