chinaski Posted June 19, 2010 Share Posted June 19, 2010 My eldest started school in January. Every month or so the class puts on a little singing show whereby the parents go to the school half hour early to watch the little dears sing. Last week they invited Dads only for one of these events. Whilst the brats were murdering "Yellow Submarine" a book was passed around. I thought it may be a comments book, but no, it was actually a visitors book where we had to sign our names. If both parents were present, no book had to be signed. Two weeks ago on BBC Breakfast there was an article aimed at women and domestic violence. Apparently while we watch football we like a drink and then afterwards we take our frustrations out on The Wife by beating the crap out of her. I find these crass generalisations offensive, mostly due to the severity of the actions that are implied. 99.9% of men/ fathers I know wouldn't dream of hitting their wives/ partners or abusing their children. When did it become the norm to base line a mans behaviour in these terms? (Oh God, do I sound like a neurotic woman?) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
natjack Posted June 19, 2010 Share Posted June 19, 2010 (Oh God, do I sound like a neurotic woman?)No, but you do sound like a neurotic man Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chinaski Posted June 19, 2010 Author Share Posted June 19, 2010 No, but you do sound like a neurotic man There's nothing wrong with being in touch with your feminine side. Does my bum look big in this? http://www.waltsense.com/storage/articles/20090819_FatBottom.jpg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cgksheff Posted June 19, 2010 Share Posted June 19, 2010 ........ we had to sign our names. If both parents were present, no book had to be signed. What did the teacher say when you asked them about it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chinaski Posted June 19, 2010 Author Share Posted June 19, 2010 What did the teacher say when you asked them about it? I did want too, but these things don't seem to rile us as yet. Men really are "dumb animals" in some respects. We're still quite comfortable with the status quo. I just find it odd how we accept it (me included, clearly) yet if these insinuations, or those of a similar kind, were thrown at women/ mothers it wouldn't be seen as acceptable. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DragonofAna Posted June 19, 2010 Share Posted June 19, 2010 No, but you do sound like a neurotic man Did no-one ever tell you that us men are the spawn of satan. If there is evil in the world - you can bet it's in the form of a man. Can you blame anyone for taking precautions when all the world's ills are the fault of men? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chinaski Posted June 19, 2010 Author Share Posted June 19, 2010 Did no-one ever tell you that us men are the spawn of satan. If there is evil in the world - you can bet it's in the form of a man. Can you blame anyone for taking precautions when all the world's ills are the fault of men? There's an interesting season on BBC4 soon, "The Fatherhood Season". One article talks about how Dads through history tend to be viewed as disciplinarian, stand offish and distant . . . yet actual accounts of children of their fathers contradicts this completely. The idea of Dads refusing to change nappies and so on is actually a modern, twisted and viral view of fathers. I know from talking to my own Grandparents that their Dad's were never viewed as distant folk who were only their to dish out the beatings. I'm not sure where this idea ever seeped in to current thinking. Maybe it's a by-product of feminist thinking. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Star Posted June 19, 2010 Share Posted June 19, 2010 My great grandfather was seriously injured fighting a war (no idea where!) and he stayed at home whilst my great grandmother ran a off track bookies and a dock side pub... He did all the 'mummy' things for my nan and her siblings... I also had a grandfather who made pickles and jams, did all the washing and ironing and baked bread every sunday morning, whilst still holding down a job as a miner... I have no idea where the gender stereotypes come from re distant/absent fathers and coddling mothers - My family haven't known these roles, and I am sure that most families haven't either... You do hear of very sexist people talking of 'mens work' or 'womens work' but these are simply people to be ignored, and are def in the minority! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fox20thc Posted June 19, 2010 Share Posted June 19, 2010 The school were probably interested in how many dads attended on their own. Not one to demonise fathers (or men in general) but I have been a single parent since my kids were 4 and 6, I can say with total honesty regardless of the opportunities afforded my childrens father, he has never attended any concert, school play, parents evening or summer fair. He doesn't show interest in reports or now they are older exams/extra curricular activities or unfortunately detentions. He isn't a crap dad, he sees them every week, but the 'mundane' parenting stuff seems to go over the top of his head as he isn't the resident parent he doesn't believe it is his responsibility to be involved. Maybe the school was gauging parental involvement in school activities, which be honest is mainly women And before anyone pipes up with the women have more time stuff - most of us also hold down full time jobs and have to fit in the school stuff around work - there is no choice in the matter. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chinaski Posted June 19, 2010 Author Share Posted June 19, 2010 The school were probably interested in how many dads attended on their own. Not one to demonise fathers (or men in general) but I have been a single parent since my kids were 4 and 6, I can say with total honesty regardless of the opportunities afforded my childrens father, he has never attended any concert, school play, parents evening or summer fair. He doesn't show interest in reports or now they are older exams/extra curricular activities or unfortunately detentions. He isn't a crap dad, he sees them every week, but the 'mundane' parenting stuff seems to go over the top of his head as he isn't the resident parent he doesn't believe it is his responsibility to be involved. Maybe the school was gauging parental involvement in school activities, which be honest is mainly women And before anyone pipes up with the women have more time stuff - most of us also hold down full time jobs and have to fit in the school stuff around work - there is no choice in the matter. I can see what you're saying, having been there as a kid. I was actually shocked. I arrived late and I'd say that over 90% of the kids Dad's were present. To be honest, I was genuinely surprised. I thought there'd only be a handful yet there was near a hundred and this was at 3 in the afternoon. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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