Bully, or bullied at school? How have you turned out?

[eastbank]

Paul this is brave of you to bring this subject up. I was never bullied in the physical sense, but because I was good at writing and spelling, I was passed empty exercise papers, and asked to write other pupils essays, who could not write. I dare not say no, and looking back this was a kind of bullying wasnt it ?

 

 

we also had a kid at our school who helped with our homework...but charged for it...nice one....a couple of kids thought they could bully him into doing it...which he did...mind you....there work was that bad...they got detention..:hihi:

[angel22]

I was bullied during my last year at school by someone i'd previously been best friends with. Looking back now, it was nothing really, not compared to what other people have been through. But at the time and for a good few years after, it really affected me. I lost all my confidence and was scared to go out. I was too scared to go to school when i knew we'd got classes together, so i didn't do quite as well in my GCSE's as what i could have done.

I bumped into him a few years ago and asked him why he'd been like that towards me. He said he only did it because he really fancied me but because we'd fallen out, that was the only way he could think of to get my attention! He was really sorry for what he'd done and genuinely didn't realise how much he'd affected me.

[Beakerzoid]

I was bullied throughout my school-life. Often used as a punch-bag to get laughs, even the person who I thought was my only friend turned out to be part of the bully-gang (and began to join in the occasional beating to impress the others). There were a few times I ended up plucking the remains of one of the lenses of my glasses from my face. I was also mocked, taunted, and insulted. The result was that I became socially awkward, introverted, and insecure in myself.

 

How this affected me in later life - well, I guess it kind of accounts for my mood swings, suicidal tendencies, and depressive phases. So many years of being told how worthless I was makes it hard for me to really believe in myself. Even now I find, at times, I can be very defeatist and lack confidence in my abilities - which is something I am trying my best to fight through.

 

I moved away from home to go to uni when I was 18 (one thing the bullying did was make me study harder to have a reason not to socialise). However it was on encountering a new environment where people seemed to accept me for who I was that my mind just gave up. I found it hard to believe that people wanted to hang around with me, and always suspected that they were using me and was awaiting the inevitable betrayal. Many times in the past I had been led on, only to have someone beat me, steal from me, or mock me. As my mind became more and more paranoid, I began some of my worst periods of self loathing, depression, and anxiety. My final year of university was a blur of episodes, and as a result I failed my degree.

 

However, the thought of going back to Liverpool was abhorrent to me, so I got a low paid temp job so I could stay in Sheffield.

 

My last suicide attempt was almost 15 years ago. It was thanks to the close friendship of someone who really understood me and cared for me that I am still here today. Not long after that I met the girl who would become my wife, and she has been the balance I have needed through my dark moments.

 

I still go through major periods of depression, but have learnt to cope with them, and channel them. I have a few really trusted friends now, and a wider circle of general buddies. I am in a job that I love, and have a family that I would do anything for. I would like to think that I have overcome the experiences of the past and become a stronger person today. I still doubt myself a lot, and feel that I will always do so, but my supportive friends and family are always there to give me a boost (and they also know when to leave me alone to sort myself out).

 

I don't care one jot what the bullies of my past are doing now. A few of them tried to add me as friends on Facebook, but I simply ignored them. I am not concerned with anything they will ever have to say, or what they have done since.

 

Anyone who knows me now all seem quite surprised when I tell them how introverted and shy I was back then, and how I was bullied. I am good at feigning confidence, but underneath the little voice of insecurity begins to whisper....

[angel22]

And to Jackie2141: If you're the way you are because of the bullies, then i guess i have something to thank them for because i wouldn't change anythin about you!

You're one of my best friends and the most lovely, kindest person i know! xx

[RootsFi]

No one said it wasn't.

 

lets hope the people you bullied (apparently) dont catch up with you, cos for some people they wont settle until they get revenge..no matter how long it takes..think about that one...

[RootsFi]

I was bullied throughout my school-life. Often used as a punch-bag to get laughs, even the person who I thought was my only friend turned out to be part of the bully-gang (and began to join in the occasional beating to impress the others). There were a few times I ended up plucking the remains of one of the lenses of my glasses from my face. I was also mocked, taunted, and insulted. The result was that I became socially awkward, introverted, and insecure in myself.

 

How this affected me in later life - well, I guess it kind of accounts for my mood swings, suicidal tendencies, and depressive phases. So many years of being told how worthless I was makes it hard for me to really believe in myself. Even now I find, at times, I can be very defeatist and lack confidence in my abilities - which is something I am trying my best to fight through.

 

I moved away from home to go to uni when I was 18 (one thing the bullying did was make me study harder to have a reason not to socialise). However it was on encountering a new environment where people seemed to accept me for who I was that my mind just gave up. I found it hard to believe that people wanted to hang around with me, and always suspected that they were using me and was awaiting the inevitable betrayal. Many times in the past I had been led on, only to have someone beat me, steal from me, or mock me. As my mind became more and more paranoid, I began some of my worst periods of self loathing, depression, and anxiety. My final year of university was a blur of episodes, and as a result I failed my degree.

 

However, the thought of going back to Liverpool was abhorrent to me, so I got a low paid temp job so I could stay in Sheffield.

 

My last suicide attempt was almost 15 years ago. It was thanks to the close friendship of someone who really understood me and cared for me that I am still here today. Not long after that I met the girl who would become my wife, and she has been the balance I have needed through my dark moments.

 

I still go through major periods of depression, but have learnt to cope with them, and channel them. I have a few really trusted friends now, and a wider circle of general buddies. I am in a job that I love, and have a family that I would do anything for. I would like to think that I have overcome the experiences of the past and become a stronger person today. I still doubt myself a lot, and feel that I will always do so, but my supportive friends and family are always there to give me a boost (and they also know when to leave me alone to sort myself out).

 

I don't care one jot what the bullies of my past are doing now. A few of them tried to add me as friends on Facebook, but I simply ignored them. I am not concerned with anything they will ever have to say, or what they have done since.

 

Anyone who knows me now all seem quite surprised when I tell them how introverted and shy I was back then, and how I was bullied. I am good at feigning confidence, but underneath the little voice of insecurity begins to whisper....

 

mate so sad you went thru all that, if i were you i would get my own back, but that would be the easy and wrong solution..makes it even more galling that one or two people on here have said they used to be bullies and have no regrets...they should read what you have written and if that does not make them have any regrets about their behaviour then they are