Sillypoint Posted August 12, 2010 Author Share Posted August 12, 2010 I could be, but I doubt it ... Some people are just unwilling to get too intimate with another human being and as soon as things look like getting serious, they back off. This is usually the male half of the equation. Sillypoint, you could try paying him back in his own coin. Stop trying to be amusing and bantering, don't text him and don't sleep with him again. See what happens next. If he's interested in a relationship with you he'll be hanging around in no time, worried that you've lost interest. I had considered this but didn't want to admit that someone had brought me down to petty games just three months in, it is like admitting failure! I think I am going to broach the subject and see what the response is. If he says he's just shy but confirms what I do think (that he is in it as much as I am) then I'll just be patient and mindful of it, nobody is perfect and we all know men need a little more help than women If not, then he's binned and I may be appearing on the singles thread Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sillypoint Posted August 12, 2010 Author Share Posted August 12, 2010 Be serious. It takes 2 to have good sex. To the OP - I'd be asking myself this: do I want to be in a relationship with someone who transforms overnight from a jovial, interesting, fun to be with person to one who has become a monosyllabic and uncommunicative bore with whom I have to elicit a response whenever there is a 'conversation' (or rather monologue from the sounds of it)? I think that some men are better off as friends and have issues with women once sex becomes part of the equation. If a little patience, perseverance and encouragement results in me being in a relationship with someone that I know could be jovial, interesting, fun to be with and loving all the time, then absolutely! I suppose I'm wondering whether this change is possible. Its not a situation I've ever been in before and if I was to end things I know the friendship would go with it as well, so I'd never want to be open to accusations that I never tried, or gave it the opportunity to work Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Suffragette1 Posted August 12, 2010 Share Posted August 12, 2010 If a little patience, perseverance and encouragement results in me being in a relationship with someone that I know could be jovial, interesting, fun to be with and loving all the time, then absolutely! I suppose I'm wondering whether this change is possible. Its not a situation I've ever been in before and if I was to end things I know the friendship would go with it as well, so I'd never want to be open to accusations that I never tried, or gave it the opportunity to work Ignore WhoseWho, who is being ridiculous. It could just be that at this early stage in a relationship, where most couples are in the 'getting to know' one another phase and exchanging all their little histories, does not apply to you, as you say, you know all about one another's skeletons. Consequently, you are negotiating a different path and he could genuinely feel a tad awkward and unsure of how to act and behave. I would suggest going away together for a weekend and chilling out, spending some time together in your new found status as a couple. Good luck, I hope that it all works out for you. Reader, I married him (my male best friend) and we're still going strong 13 years on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rubydazzler Posted August 12, 2010 Share Posted August 12, 2010 I had considered this but didn't want to admit that someone had brought me down to petty games just three months in, it is like admitting failure! I think I am going to broach the subject and see what the response is. If he says he's just shy but confirms what I do think (that he is in it as much as I am) then I'll just be patient and mindful of it, nobody is perfect and we all know men need a little more help than women If not, then he's binned and I may be appearing on the singles thread It's not playing petty games, it's drawing back a little bit, the way you would with a shy woodland creature, so as not to spook it! I think broaching the subject would totally be the worse thing you could do. But then, I'm not a man and I've never been able to understand them at all. Sometimes trying too hard just scares people away. Giving the impression that you have plenty of things to occupy your time and that he isn't the be-all and end-all of your life might just get the friendship back on track? People say that with men treat em mean keeps em keen, whereas we're just the opposite! Give it a go, what do you have to lose? Anyway that's all I can offer, I've never had any luck at all with the male sex so don't take too much notice of anything I say! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whosewho Posted August 12, 2010 Share Posted August 12, 2010 It's not playing petty games, it's drawing back a little bit, the way you would with a shy woodland creature, so as not to spook it! I think broaching the subject would totally be the worse thing you could do. But then, I'm not a man and I've never been able to understand them at all. Sometimes trying too hard just scares people away. Giving the impression that you have plenty of things to occupy your time and that he isn't the be-all and end-all of your life might just get the friendship back on track? People say that with men treat em mean keeps em keen, whereas we're just the opposite! Give it a go, what do you have to lose? Anyway that's all I can offer, I've never had any luck at all with the male sex so don't take too much notice of anything I say! You sometimes make perfect sense! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Suffragette1 Posted August 12, 2010 Share Posted August 12, 2010 It's not playing petty games, it's drawing back a little bit, the way you would with a shy woodland creature, so as not to spook it! I think broaching the subject would totally be the worse thing you could do. But then, I'm not a man and I've never been able to understand them at all. Sometimes trying too hard just scares people away. Giving the impression that you have plenty of things to occupy your time and that he isn't the be-all and end-all of your life might just get the friendship back on track? People say that with men treat em mean keeps em keen, whereas we're just the opposite! Give it a go, what do you have to lose? Anyway that's all I can offer, I've never had any luck at all with the male sex so don't take too much notice of anything I say! I'd agree with that, I've never understood why some women seem to fall into that trap, it has never, ever worked on me. Does treating men mean keep 'em keen? I suspect that many suffer from an acute case of Henry VIII syndrome, ie being only interested in the conquest and rapidly losing interest once they have had their wicked way. I also think that some men can be silver tongued as part of their seduction routine and as soon as that is out of the way, revert to type. It's the modern day equivalent of promising marriage to get a woman into bed then reneging on it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rubydazzler Posted August 12, 2010 Share Posted August 12, 2010 You sometimes make perfect sense!Tell us, who were you before you became whosewho? Or should I say before you were banned for life again? I'm just channelling Christian Carter, an internet bot, who tells you how to love em and keep em ... if you can be bothered to follow the rules! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Northrend Posted August 12, 2010 Share Posted August 12, 2010 Well I met you at that meet Ruby. I wish I had luck with you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Northrend Posted August 12, 2010 Share Posted August 12, 2010 I'd agree with that, I've never understood why some women seem to fall into that trap, it has never, ever worked on me. Does treating men mean keep 'em keen? I suspect that many suffer from an acute case of Henry VIII syndrome, ie being only interested in the conquest and rapidly losing interest once they have had their wicked way. I also think that some men can be silver tongued as part of their seduction routine and as soon as that is out of the way, revert to type. It's the modern day equivalent of promising marriage to get a woman into bed then reneging on it. Well I did all that and followed through with my promise and then after shooting out 2 kids she dumped me for a "better life" So not just the men who play games Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Suffragette1 Posted August 12, 2010 Share Posted August 12, 2010 Well I did all that and followed through with my promise and then after shooting out 2 kids she dumped me for a "better life" So not just the men who play games I never suggested that it was! Women can be scheming little <insert appropriate profanity here>. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.