Classic Rock Posted September 11, 2010 Share Posted September 11, 2010 As a wedding DJ I've been to several wedding parties where food has been wasted and the couple have been disappointed because friends haven't turned up. This is especially prominent among couples who are or who have friends age 30+. It's like there's an apathy once you reach a certain age. Maybe people think that their lack of presence won't be noticed as there will be lots of others there. Sadly if many think this then that's why the turnout can be disappointing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chem1st Posted September 11, 2010 Share Posted September 11, 2010 Something has arose today that has really annoyed me, it does not concern me but I have had this done to me loads of times by them and other people, and needed to put it on here! Special occasions ie birthdays, weddings christenings etc, should be celebrated and when people go to all the effort in inviting people they should say right from the start if there not going to turn up! someone I know is getting married today and has invited other people we know, as per usual they have said they are going only to phone up and say there not, it annoys me because these people dont realise that they do it all the time, they have get togethers themselves and complain when people dont turn up, but they are always making excuses and not turning up when they are invited to other peoples dos. AAAAhhhhh selfish gits!!! I think a lot of people are afraid of turning up to a wedding, say if they have no money to buy drinks or bring gifts, such is the custom. Unforeseen problems may arise. With celebrations being so commercialised these days, I think the fear factor is greater. Everybody wants the day to go perfect, and at times, people will consider it better to not go as they worry their presence will be a hindrance or burden (rightly & wrongly depending). Don't beat yourself up about it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spindrift Posted September 11, 2010 Share Posted September 11, 2010 Some people say I'm self-centered but that's enough about them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
selphie Posted September 11, 2010 Share Posted September 11, 2010 When we got married last year I invited a lot of friends who 'couldn't make it to my hen weekend'. I paid just under £60 per head for these people. There was about 10 of them altogether. They were all supposed to be comning to our wedding but never turned up. That's £600 that I wasted!!! Not one of them explained why they weren't there, nor did they apologise!! Needless to say, these people are no longer my friends. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gnvqsos Posted September 11, 2010 Share Posted September 11, 2010 Something has arose today that has really annoyed me, it does not concern me but I have had this done to me loads of times by them and other people, and needed to put it on here! Special occasions ie birthdays, weddings christenings etc, should be celebrated and when people go to all the effort in inviting people they should say right from the start if there not going to turn up! someone I know is getting married today and has invited other people we know, as per usual they have said they are going only to phone up and say there not, it annoys me because these people dont realise that they do it all the time, they have get togethers themselves and complain when people dont turn up, but they are always making excuses and not turning up when they are invited to other peoples dos. AAAAhhhhh selfish gits!!! I understood that only an egocentric would allow this to upset them Young Jung Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rubydazzler Posted September 11, 2010 Share Posted September 11, 2010 ...my engagement party 4 months ago. ...Hey, that's great news! Congratulations ... x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
relost Posted September 13, 2010 Share Posted September 13, 2010 Hey, that's great news! Congratulations ... x Thanks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
my eyes only Posted September 14, 2010 Author Share Posted September 14, 2010 I understood that only an egocentric would allow this to upset them are you calling me that ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
my eyes only Posted September 14, 2010 Author Share Posted September 14, 2010 I think a lot of people are afraid of turning up to a wedding, say if they have no money to buy drinks or bring gifts, such is the custom. Unforeseen problems may arise. With celebrations being so commercialised these days, I think the fear factor is greater. Everybody wants the day to go perfect, and at times, people will consider it better to not go as they worry their presence will be a hindrance or burden (rightly & wrongly depending). Don't beat yourself up about it. I completely understand that some people might not be able to go due to finances, but its not as tho they have only been invited a couple of days before, theres not many people who are genuinely skink, I have found that after the event they dont seem to be that skint, when there going out drinking etc... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
my eyes only Posted September 14, 2010 Author Share Posted September 14, 2010 Im glad you are not her friend anymore..... I had what I classed as a close friend who didn't turn up for my engagement party4 months ago. I thought we were very close. She had let me down twice on nights out prior to this, with lame excuses....Bear in mind, she would have been my bridesmaid at our wedding next year. 2 years prior to this, she has a lovely OH until she started getting up to no good behind his back. Needless to say, he found out and got rid of her, and for almost 2 years, she has had these depressive dips where all she does is contact him and talk about how she loves him. I tried to talk to him for her, tried to get her to start looking after herself and stop people using her.. she carried on.. she had used this "down feeling" as an excuse not to turn up to other events (even ones she asked me to organise) I kind of expected her not to turn up as she was getting good at letting me down. almost 100 people turned up and she texted me 2 hours into the party saying she wasn't coming as she felt **** and didn't want to appear miserable.. I was so angry. I didn't even bother to reply. I tried to talk to her about it a few weeks later, and she gave me the sob story of how ill and down she feels, and how she doesn't like big crowds and she felt everyone would think she was mardy. I tried to explain that there were at least 20 people there who knew her, and people who, she could have sat with, and she was even told to bring a friend/ partner. The day after my party and for weeks on she was going out to gigs, pubs, restaurants and shopping. I asked her why this was and explained that it just made me feel I wasn't important.. She had nothing to say. I asked her if she was to be my bridesmaid would she then text on the day saying she wouldn't be there.. She ignored that question. Needless to say, she won't be my bridesmaid now, 3 chances in 5 months, and I had offered her someone to talk to etc... we haven't really spoken. She is still on my facebook account and I see she bas a busy social life, but not once has tried to apologise even though now she is feeling better. She has made lots of new friends thorugh work etc, and at first I was a bit annoyed that she had time for them, but couldn't see how badly she had behaved towards me. I should have expected it to be honest, we had a similar scenario about 4 years ago when she found out her "internet boyfriend" was engaged and was trying to meet new women behind her back. she caught him by setting him up ,after asking for my help and then told him that it was all my idea. I should never have forgiven her for that, but gave her the benefit of the doubt. It sounds cold, but I actually don't feel sad we aren't frieds anymore.... she was getting to be a bit of a burden with her negativity. I'm not even sure if she asked to meet up I would even want to. Truth is, regardless... those who care will be there. Those who aren't there, (apart form those with genuine serious reasons) don't care... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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