Blaze Posted September 21, 2010 Share Posted September 21, 2010 You need to be able to take care of you and yours without relying on anyone else. It's your partners car so you have to deal with it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rubydazzler Posted September 21, 2010 Share Posted September 21, 2010 My father used to walk down to meet me at the bus stop when I was coming home from the youth club at 14, but at 19, I'd expect an adult be able to find her own way home. It's only a bus ride, isn't it? Do you pick her up from the pub and when she's out clubbing as well? Parents today, eh? Won't allow their grown up kids any freedom at all Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
_BLADESMAN_ Posted September 21, 2010 Author Share Posted September 21, 2010 Well yes it is if it wasn't to do with her. Maybe your partner will change her mind nearer to the time of your daughter finishing college? I'm hoping so. Told her she's well out of order and most posts here seem to agree. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
danot Posted September 21, 2010 Share Posted September 21, 2010 Any good dad would do the same.Agreed!. But this isn't about being a good dad, it's about whether the op's partner is being unreasonable for refusing him the loan of her car, preventing him from picking up his daughter. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MissMonkey Posted September 21, 2010 Share Posted September 21, 2010 When she goes out with her mates, do you go and collect her so she doesn't have to get a bus? Personally, I think a 19 should be quite capable of getting home that early in the evening - you could always meet her at the bus stop if the area you live in is so very bad. That's not really the same as being alone on her way home from college. I'm 19 & I wouldn't like to be in town turned 9pm on my own, when it's dark. Wouldn't bother me in the summer Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dozy Posted September 21, 2010 Share Posted September 21, 2010 This is my way of thinking right now. 80% just take it (I am insured and have a full licence) 20% bus. My bold Just spotted this post - if you want to escalate the argument into a full-scale bust up, then taking her car would be just the way to do it! Even if she had previously agreed to the arrangement, and no matter how unreasonable you feel she is to refuse permission now, it's still her car. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
_BLADESMAN_ Posted September 21, 2010 Author Share Posted September 21, 2010 When she goes out with her mates, do you go and collect her so she doesn't have to get a bus? Personally, I think a 19 should be quite capable of getting home that early in the evening - you could always meet her at the bus stop if the area you live in is so very bad. When she goes out with friends she's not alone. Whether 9pm is early to you or not, it's still dark. Would it worry you if your daughter had to travel 5 miles home at this hour alone? Not a dig, I'm just interested. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Prime Posted September 21, 2010 Share Posted September 21, 2010 My bold But that isn't necessarily the case, the OP might have said something very nasty that upset the OH. (I'm not trying to imply the OH did, just pointing out that she didn't necessarily say it just because OH disagreed with her.) Any way, if it was in the middle of an argument, it was probably just said in the heat of the moment, and she might change her mind when she calms down. Well true, that's why I said if. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rubydazzler Posted September 21, 2010 Share Posted September 21, 2010 When my daughter was in 6th form (17-18 ), she used to get the bus to Wicker and then walk to somewhere in one of the back streets where she did telephone canvassing, then get the bus back arriving home about 9.30 ... it never occurred to either of us that she should be taken and fetched back. Although that was 10 years ago, maybe things have got more threatening since then? Shirecliffe can't be that bad, that a grown woman can't make her own way home by bus? One of my cousins lives there and it always seems fairly quiet to me. If she's very timid, you could text her to get a cab and pay for it when she arrives? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
_BLADESMAN_ Posted September 21, 2010 Author Share Posted September 21, 2010 Fact is she's refused me out of spite. Taking it out on my daughter for our argument and putting her at risk to the scum out there these days, surely is not right. Especially when, as already said, an arrangement was in place to pick her up. I shall wait til the last minute to inform my daughter of the situation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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