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Forced to be normal?


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I think that to one extent or another every one of us is wearing a facade when we're at work or dealing with people for a living, where we have to put up with more than we would do if we weren't being paid to put up with it.

 

I'd love to say that there's an easy solution to your situation, but in all honesty I think your way forwards is to work on your facade rather than to expect yourself to be able to be 'fine'. Wear your facade like armour to protect you from the worst of the outside world. When I was working I had an unshakeable facade. Even when I knew that I was shaking with nerves and utter dread inside I knew from having seen myself on filmed sessions that I didn't look nervous and I took comfort in that. Maybe you will too, when you feel confident that you have unbreakable armour.

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A brief history.

Suffered depression for many, many years, got over it, got a job, love the job, had for a long while now wish it would pay more blah blah.

But i still have depression from time to time but am not allowed to show anything at work other than a happy (fake) smiley (fake) jovial (fake) chatty sort of bloke without a care in the world.

It may seem an odd question to post but can my employer force me to be normal and to ignore my depressive days?

When i say depressive i dont mean playin the with razors, Well not for the last 5 years on that score anyway. What i mean is i go quiet. I do my job but go very quiet and just want to work things out in my head and get on with my job. My job always gets done and i often stay late to make sure but some days its hard to be the clown.

I keep getting told that i was 'employed for the way i am with people' so 'must keep it up' but some days its really, really hard.

Theyve always known about my depression, infact thats why they got me on the cheap as it were.

So there you go, can they or am i just a raving looney who should do the workd a favour and end it all.

If anyone says i should end it all i wont. Ive got a driving test on thursday and im sure im going to pass it. I mean, what a waste of money the lessons will have been if i top myself before i take the test??

 

keep it up you av done brilliant

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Hello.

I just have to say , good on you for admitting your 'Condition'.I think like you, I work with the public, and most of the time I'm ok but as you say, there are times when I retreat inside my own head, and although polite and friendly, I don't want to be the life and soul of the party 24/7.

What I'd say to you is..Be yourself, you're obviously good at what you do, still bringing in business and money for your employers, until you stop doing that, they should have no complaints.We are all different, and we are not robots.Don't beat yourself up about it.

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may I ask if you work with other people, and do they have their 'on' days and 'off' days?

are they allowed to?

Just because you suffer from depression, it shouldn't mean that you cant have your off days too. (non depressives tend to get away with being grumpy)

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may I ask if you work with other people, and do they have their 'on' days and 'off' days?

 

are they allowed to?

 

Just because you suffer from depression, it shouldn't mean that you cant have your off days too. (non depressives tend to get away with being grumpy)

 

Just what I was thinking.

Many people have to act a part at work. I have known people completely different away from work.

We all have off days at some time.

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I'm sure 9 out of 10 people who work with customers put on a false happy smile, think of it the other way around if you were served or spoke with someone who has depression and they was not hiding that fact, you would just think they are being a miserable grumpy sod and you would take your bussiness elsewhere next time.

 

I don't think they would have a cause to sack you (legally), but they could well put you in a role which involves less customer focus (sat in a cupboard room doing admin or something!) which could make you feel even worse.

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