chem1st Posted December 4, 2010 Share Posted December 4, 2010 Recently there has been a spate of crime across the UK committed by a new type of criminal, the little old woman Pushing into queues at Morrisons, stealing bread from other people trolleys, stealing parking spaces, throwing cats in bins etc. Not long back I put some recyclables into a neighbours recycling bin as mine had been stolen, not long after I was greeted with fury and vengence, banging on my door and the chanting of, "dunt put thi much in our dustbin!". I was speaking to some teenagers trying to construct an igloo due to the lack of council housing in Sheffield and they told me how one old lady had been terrorising them, having popped their football but a week ago, she has now proceeded to steal their snowman and kick in their igloo. They refuse to call the police as they think they would get into trouble for wasting police time. What's gone wrong to society, have they been putting too much brandy in their tea? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
saxon51 Posted December 4, 2010 Share Posted December 4, 2010 You forgot: Hit and run on mobility scooters Urinating on public transport Assault with 'bag for life' Driving without eyesight Being in possession of marmite. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mort Posted December 4, 2010 Share Posted December 4, 2010 Possession of marmite should be a flogging offence imo. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Swan_Vesta Posted December 4, 2010 Share Posted December 4, 2010 Assault with 'bag for life' Should that not read "Assault by a 'bag for life'?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chem1st Posted December 4, 2010 Author Share Posted December 4, 2010 It's a global problem too! http://www.japantoday.com/category/crime/view/elderly-woman-arrested-for-beating-youth-sitting-in-priority-seat-of-bus Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melthebell Posted December 4, 2010 Share Posted December 4, 2010 you been watching the goodies again? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BettyBooHoo! Posted December 4, 2010 Share Posted December 4, 2010 This type of old lady crime is most definatly on the up. I fear for my future, when I reach a certain age, will I become...one of THEM??? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melthebell Posted December 4, 2010 Share Posted December 4, 2010 This type of old lady crime is most definatly on the up. I fear for my future, when I reach a certain age, will I become...one of THEM??? your not already? errrrrrrrrrm *gets coat* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BettyBooHoo! Posted December 4, 2010 Share Posted December 4, 2010 your not already? errrrrrrrrrm *gets coat* Maybe, I did frown at a child earlier... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melthebell Posted December 4, 2010 Share Posted December 4, 2010 Maybe, I did frown at a child earlier... tch how could you? you cold, calculated, evil personage Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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