Farting set to become illegal in Malawi.

[Fareast]

BettyBooHoo,

You mention our dear Queen, in connection with unwanted wind. I can only recall one nasty incident. I think it was about 1957. Right in the middle of the Xmas Day Queen 's Speech, she let a real ripper go. In those days, broadcasts were live, too. With her usual sang-froid, she carried on as if nothing had happened but I 'm sure I spotted someone ' off-camera ', rushing out of the room, a handkerchief clutched to his nose.

Of course, in 1957, no-one would dare mention the incident. The only leak [ ! ] to emerge was that The Times, later, reported that a BBC Executive had been admitted to Charing Cross hospital at 3.30 p.m. on Xmas Day, suffering from ' breathing problems, shock and nausea, '

[Yog Sothoth]

Good job I don't work there then! I don't generally fart in polite company but I inadvertently let loose a right honker at work on Friday, in front of my female coleagues, who carried on as if nothing had happened.

[Rupert_Baehr]

Good job I don't work there then! I don't generally fart in polite company but I inadvertently let loose a right honker at work on Friday, in front of my female coleagues, who carried on as if nothing had happened.

 

You take it in turn?

 

I've heard of a 'pecking order', but taking turns to fart is going a bit far.

 

How do you know whose turn it is next? Is there a little lighted numeric sign (like the one in a pharmacy) which tells you who is next?

[vinyl]

I saw a useful device in the adverts in Private Eye. It was an insert to make farts sound like mobile phone ring tones.

 

So letting one go simply sounded like your mobile phone going off, giving you time to nip out to answer your phone and not only avoid the smell, but also allow time for the finger to be pointed at someone else. It could be a good seller in Malawi.

[Digsy]

What about the legalities of a whoopi chushion.

[Kaimani]

was just outside having a smoke. the front fence is about waist high so if you sit down people can't see you. there was a woman walking on the sidewalk. she looked around to see if anyone was there. satisfied she was alone she stopped and let go of the loudest and longest fart i've ever heard. wouldn't be surprised if she followed through a little. just then i stood up to try and walk away before she saw me but was too late. she simply said 'good evening', straightened her clothes and walked to her house, opposite mine. could have shopped her if it was Malawi. will be interesting to see how we relate to each other after this.