rubydazzler Posted April 7, 2011 Share Posted April 7, 2011 Dear ALL,, thanx for your comments,, can i point out that,, I am not a Male nor do i look like Jo Brand, i am infact 5ft5, size 12, i have a responsible job, i drive a black soft top convertable, and i adore my life, :) :hihi: look, I'm choking here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
girlyblonde Posted April 7, 2011 Author Share Posted April 7, 2011 Aww there is no need to choke,, you too can look as lovely as i do ,, if you only made the effort,, im sure with a lot of work you too can be presentable Ruby xxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nataliie Posted April 7, 2011 Share Posted April 7, 2011 Aww there is no need to choke,, you too can look as lovely as i do ,, if you only made the effort,, im sure with a lot of work you too can be presentable Ruby xxxx Aww, I'm glad you believe you've got your looks going for you.. after all they wont fade into nothingness as you get older will they? Then you'll be left with your dazzling wit and sparkling personality *ahem* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pattricia Posted April 7, 2011 Share Posted April 7, 2011 Aww there is no need to choke,, you too can look as lovely as i do ,, if you only made the effort,, im sure with a lot of work you too can be presentable Ruby xxxx Who are you ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Isabelle Posted April 7, 2011 Share Posted April 7, 2011 Aww, I'm glad you believe you've got your looks going for you.. after all they wont fade into nothingness as you get older will they? Then you'll be left with your dazzling wit and sparkling personality *ahem* Apparently she's that confident with her looks that she feels the need to brag about it to strangers on a forum? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kaimani Posted April 7, 2011 Share Posted April 7, 2011 Aww there is no need to choke,, you too can look as lovely as i do ,, if you only made the effort,, im sure with a lot of work you too can be presentable Ruby xxxx 'lovely' people don't need to put any effort into it, last i checked. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scozzie Posted April 8, 2011 Share Posted April 8, 2011 'lovely' people don't need to put any effort into it, last i checked. are you serious??! All hair removal methods have tricked us with their promises of easy, painless removal. The epilady, scissors, razors, Nair and.... The Wax!! My night began as any other normal weekday night. Come home; fix dinner; played with the kids. I then had the thought that would ring painfully in my mind for the next few hours; "Maybe I should pull the wax out of the medicine cabinet?" So I headed to the site of my demise; the bathroom. It was one of those cold wax kits. No melting a clump of hot wax, you just rub the strips together in your hand and then they get warm and you peel them apart, press it to your leg (or wherever else) and hair comes right off! No mess, no fuss. How hard can it be? I mean, I'm no girly, girl, but am mechanically inclined enough that I can figure it out. *YA THINK!!!*� So I pull one of the thin strips out. It's two strips facing each together, stuck together. Instead of rubbing them together, I get out the hairdryer and heat it to 1000 degrees. Cold wax my rear end (Oh,how this phrase haunts me!). I lay the strip across my thigh. Hold the skin around it tight and pull. OK... So it wasn't the best feeling, but it wasn't too bad. I can do this!!! Hair removal no longer eludes me!! I am She-Ra, fighter of all wayward body hair and smooth skin extraordinaire!! With my next wax strip, I move "north". After checking on the kids, I sneak back into the bathroom for the ultimate hair fighting championship. I drop my panties and place one foot on the toilet. Using the same procedure, I apply the wax strip across the right side of the bikini line, covering the right half of my vagina and stretching down to the inside of my butt cheek (Yes, it was a long strip). I inhale deeply and brace myself.... RRRRIIIIIIPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!! I'm Blind!!!!! Blinded from pain!!!!!!... OH DEAR GOD !!!!!!!!!!! I'm making noises that only dogs can hear .. Vision slowly returning, I notice that I've only managed to pull off half of the strip. S**T!!! Another deep breath and RRIIPP... Everything is swirly and spotted . I cannot breath or speak - I have forgotten how .. Do I hear crashing drums????? Wait a few minutes and I'm back to normal (nearly) After all this I want to see my trophy !!! - A wax covered strip with my hairy pelt that has caused me so much pain, sticking to it. I want to revel in the glory that is my triumph over body hair. I hold up the strip! There's no hair on it! Where is the hair?? WHERE IS THE WAX? Slowly I ease my head down, foot still perched on the toilet. I see the hair... The hair that should be on the strip. I touch. I am touching wax. S**T!!! I run my fingers over the most sensitive part of my body, which is now covered in cold wax and matted hair. Then I make the next BIG mistake . . . . . . . Remember, my foot is still propped up on the toilet. I know I need to do something, so I put my foot down. DAMN!!! I hear the slamming of the cell door. Vagina? Sealed shut! Butt?? Sealed shut!!! I penguin walk around the bathroom, trying to figure out what to do and think to myself, "Please don't let me get the urge to poop. My head may pop off." Hot water!! Hot water melts wax!! I'll run the hottest water I can stand into the bathtub, get in, immerse the wax covered bits and the wax should melt and I can gently wipe it off, right?? WRONG!!!! I get in the tub - The water is slightly hotter than then that used to torture prisoners of war or sterilize surgical equipment - I sit. Now, the only thing worse that having your nether businesses glued together is having them glued together and then glued to the bottom of the tub. In scalding hot water!! (Which, by the way, doesn't melt cold wax) So, now I'm stuck to the bottom of the tub!!! God bless the man what convinced me I should have a phone in the bathroom!!! I call my friend, thinking surely she's waxed before and has come secret of how to get me undone. It's a very good conversation starter, "So my butt and who-ha are stuck to the bottom of the tub!" There is a slight pause. She doesn't have a secret trick, but does try to hide the laughter from me. She wants to know exactly where the wax is located. "Are we talking buttock cheek or is it covering - you know - Everywhere(cringe factor 20000 at this point) ?" She's laughing out loud by now...I can hear her. I give her the rundown and she suggests I call the number on the side of the box. YEAH RIGHT!!!!!! I should be the 'butt' of someone else's work-night jokes. While we go through various solutions, I resort to scraping the wax off with a razor. Nothing feels better then to have your girlie goodies covered in hot wax, glued shut, stuck to the tub in super hot water, and then dry shaving the sticky wax off!!! By now, the brain is not working, dignity has taken a major hike and I slip into glazed donut land. My friend is still talking with me and my hand reaches towards the saving grace...The lotion they give you to remove the excess wax. What do I really have to lose at this point. I rub some on and OH MY GOD!!!!! The scream probably woke the kids, scared the dickens out of my friend, but I really don't care!! "IT WORKS!! IT WORKS!!" I get a hearty congratulation from my friend and she hangs up. I successfully remove the remainder of the wax and then notice, to my grief and despair... THE HAIR IS STILL THERE... ALL OF IT!!!!!!!!!!! So, I shaved it off. Heck, I'm numb at this point. Next week I'm going to try hair colour . . . . . . . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Glennis Posted April 8, 2011 Share Posted April 8, 2011 oh come on, guys! It's obviously a wind-up ... Is there a prize for guessing who it is? Ms modest? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sumayyah Posted April 8, 2011 Share Posted April 8, 2011 are you serious??! All hair removal methods have tricked us with their promises of easy, painless removal. The epilady, scissors, razors, Nair and.... The Wax!! My night began as any other normal weekday night. Come home; fix dinner; played with the kids. I then had the thought that would ring painfully in my mind for the next few hours; "Maybe I should pull the wax out of the medicine cabinet?" So I headed to the site of my demise; the bathroom. It was one of those cold wax kits. No melting a clump of hot wax, you just rub the strips together in your hand and then they get warm and you peel them apart, press it to your leg (or wherever else) and hair comes right off! No mess, no fuss. How hard can it be? I mean, I'm no girly, girl, but am mechanically inclined enough that I can figure it out. *YA THINK!!!*� So I pull one of the thin strips out. It's two strips facing each together, stuck together. Instead of rubbing them together, I get out the hairdryer and heat it to 1000 degrees. Cold wax my rear end (Oh,how this phrase haunts me!). I lay the strip across my thigh. Hold the skin around it tight and pull. OK... So it wasn't the best feeling, but it wasn't too bad. I can do this!!! Hair removal no longer eludes me!! I am She-Ra, fighter of all wayward body hair and smooth skin extraordinaire!! With my next wax strip, I move "north". After checking on the kids, I sneak back into the bathroom for the ultimate hair fighting championship. I drop my panties and place one foot on the toilet. Using the same procedure, I apply the wax strip across the right side of the bikini line, covering the right half of my vagina and stretching down to the inside of my butt cheek (Yes, it was a long strip). I inhale deeply and brace myself.... RRRRIIIIIIPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!! I'm Blind!!!!! Blinded from pain!!!!!!... OH DEAR GOD !!!!!!!!!!! I'm making noises that only dogs can hear .. Vision slowly returning, I notice that I've only managed to pull off half of the strip. S**T!!! Another deep breath and RRIIPP... Everything is swirly and spotted . I cannot breath or speak - I have forgotten how .. Do I hear crashing drums????? Wait a few minutes and I'm back to normal (nearly) After all this I want to see my trophy !!! - A wax covered strip with my hairy pelt that has caused me so much pain, sticking to it. I want to revel in the glory that is my triumph over body hair. I hold up the strip! There's no hair on it! Where is the hair?? WHERE IS THE WAX? Slowly I ease my head down, foot still perched on the toilet. I see the hair... The hair that should be on the strip. I touch. I am touching wax. S**T!!! I run my fingers over the most sensitive part of my body, which is now covered in cold wax and matted hair. Then I make the next BIG mistake . . . . . . . Remember, my foot is still propped up on the toilet. I know I need to do something, so I put my foot down. DAMN!!! I hear the slamming of the cell door. Vagina? Sealed shut! Butt?? Sealed shut!!! I penguin walk around the bathroom, trying to figure out what to do and think to myself, "Please don't let me get the urge to poop. My head may pop off." Hot water!! Hot water melts wax!! I'll run the hottest water I can stand into the bathtub, get in, immerse the wax covered bits and the wax should melt and I can gently wipe it off, right?? WRONG!!!! I get in the tub - The water is slightly hotter than then that used to torture prisoners of war or sterilize surgical equipment - I sit. Now, the only thing worse that having your nether businesses glued together is having them glued together and then glued to the bottom of the tub. In scalding hot water!! (Which, by the way, doesn't melt cold wax) So, now I'm stuck to the bottom of the tub!!! God bless the man what convinced me I should have a phone in the bathroom!!! I call my friend, thinking surely she's waxed before and has come secret of how to get me undone. It's a very good conversation starter, "So my butt and who-ha are stuck to the bottom of the tub!" There is a slight pause. She doesn't have a secret trick, but does try to hide the laughter from me. She wants to know exactly where the wax is located. "Are we talking buttock cheek or is it covering - you know - Everywhere(cringe factor 20000 at this point) ?" She's laughing out loud by now...I can hear her. I give her the rundown and she suggests I call the number on the side of the box. YEAH RIGHT!!!!!! I should be the 'butt' of someone else's work-night jokes. While we go through various solutions, I resort to scraping the wax off with a razor. Nothing feels better then to have your girlie goodies covered in hot wax, glued shut, stuck to the tub in super hot water, and then dry shaving the sticky wax off!!! By now, the brain is not working, dignity has taken a major hike and I slip into glazed donut land. My friend is still talking with me and my hand reaches towards the saving grace...The lotion they give you to remove the excess wax. What do I really have to lose at this point. I rub some on and OH MY GOD!!!!! The scream probably woke the kids, scared the dickens out of my friend, but I really don't care!! "IT WORKS!! IT WORKS!!" I get a hearty congratulation from my friend and she hangs up. I successfully remove the remainder of the wax and then notice, to my grief and despair... THE HAIR IS STILL THERE... ALL OF IT!!!!!!!!!!! So, I shaved it off. Heck, I'm numb at this point. Next week I'm going to try hair colour . . . . . . . oh my, now thats a predicament ( thou im sure ive read this before, you told this story previously? ) thanks for the laugh hun Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sumayyah Posted April 8, 2011 Share Posted April 8, 2011 plenty of girly girls in sheffield of various levels i acctualy only wear dresses or skirts, like having my nails in good shape, same for the hair thou the only time i would be out in the full make up is a night out/event. eyeliner, mascara and a slick of lip gloss does it the rest of the time does make me laugh thou when after talking to new people they tell me im acctually quite intelligent, gee thanks so im supposed to be dumb? i also like hiking and camping so not adverse to ending up covered in mud, nothing a shower couldnt solve eh Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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