Green Web Posted May 2, 2011 Share Posted May 2, 2011 I'm in the process of helping my uncle move house, he refuses to pay for services such as removal men, but thinks nothing of buying crap from shopping centres and charity shops, I have an estate car, spare cash so just purchased £200 of http://www.reallyusefulproducts.co.uk/uk/html/onlineshop/fullrange_rub.php to try and help make life simple. However it isn't simple at all, he refuses to use the boxes because he thinks I've wasted my money and i should get a refund, there is mountains of junk all over the house that you can't even walk up the stairs! There's off cuts of wood from the 1980's, over 30 pairs of running trainers and dozens of alarm clocks, cuddly toys you name it! I have limited patience and need help to try and convince him that keeping all this junk simply isn't feasible or practical:help: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
V.Rossi Posted May 2, 2011 Share Posted May 2, 2011 Try living with it, ok not quite as severe as what you explain but my missus is the same, she has junk drawers and carrier bags in all the cupboards full of junk that she just refuses to sort or chuck. Drives me Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Green Web Posted May 2, 2011 Author Share Posted May 2, 2011 I couldn't mate, I lived with a girl just like that and dumped her becuase of that reason, but will admit we're total opposites, I'm more of a OCD minimalist who would rather bin stuff for convenience and simplicity than sell it or give it away. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AJ sheffield Posted May 2, 2011 Share Posted May 2, 2011 I love hoarding, I have one drawer and it is full to bursting with power supplys for things I dont even have anymore, there must 40 of them Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
synthpulse Posted May 2, 2011 Share Posted May 2, 2011 If it's that bad, I would consider getting him some help, as it can be a sign of mental illness. Depending on his age, it really can't be safe to have that much lying around either if it isn't stored properly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rubydazzler Posted May 2, 2011 Share Posted May 2, 2011 The one thing not to do is to nag him about it. It is a form of mental illness, OCD hoarding is a valid diagnosis and affects many people. The best thing to do is bag up all the bits of wood and genuine rubbish first and get that out of the way first. He'll not like it, but you have to be cruel to be kind. Then once you can move around more easily you can involve him in dialogue about what to keep and what to throw away. You could try persuading him that you are going to take the dumping pile to a good cause who will make use of it and that he's going to be helping other people with his castoffs. I do what I call 'first fix' when all the obviously broken and useless stuff gets dumped, and then when things have had time to calm down a bit, and we all feel less stressed, I go through the keep pile again and get rid of some more. Just remember that actually throwing anything away will be causing him genuine mental torment and try not to push him too hard. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
metalman Posted May 2, 2011 Share Posted May 2, 2011 I still don't think that hoarding is a sign of mental illness, any more than throwing everything away is. Some people like to have lots of things, some people don't. Why not just go with it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rubydazzler Posted May 2, 2011 Share Posted May 2, 2011 I still don't think that hoarding is a sign of mental illness, any more than throwing everything away is. Some people like to have lots of things, some people don't. Why not just go with it?That's possibly because you don't know much about it, or how it impacts on sufferers. It's not just untidiness, it's a lot more than that. You can never know how someone else feels about what looks like a load of old tat or junk. Believe me, when it's a big deal about throwing away an odd earring or a pile of magazines, you're not quite right in the head. I'm just going through the same scenario for the second time in 5 years. It's a nightmare and I can't begin to tell you how stressed and agitated I am right now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amaranthus Posted May 2, 2011 Share Posted May 2, 2011 I still don't think that hoarding is a sign of mental illness, any more than throwing everything away is. Some people like to have lots of things, some people don't. Why not just go with it? In the extremes it can be unhealthy as the sheer amount of junk prevents you from being able to clean the house properly. I don't understand hoarding as I'm the total opposite, but perhaps it's comforting to people to have lots of familiar things around them - like some sort of constant in your life. It can get to a point though when they might need an intervention and a little help from family/ friends. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Green Web Posted May 2, 2011 Author Share Posted May 2, 2011 My uncle finds difficult to make decisions, so I think by keeping everything you never loose anything or make mistakes, but nor do you actually do anything either. Its comforting, but impractical, time consuming, costly, and most importantly unsafe. the new house he's moving to is too small and he needs to be out of his current home by Wednesday. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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