cuttsie Posted May 15, 2011 Share Posted May 15, 2011 Prince Edwards School Manor Top 1954 and Gratton our teacher who was related to Atilla The Hun declared that now we were in senior school we all had to learn how to swim. Now most of us had never seen a proper plumbed in bath near mind a swimming baths so we was all filled with dread at things to come. When i got home that Friday and told my old Ma that Gratton said i had got to learn to swim there was much shouting and bawling as to the problem of TRUNKS! you see i had never even owned a pair of under pants near mind trunks,However when things had calmed down a bit our mob decided to try and come up with a solution to the swimming attire, first of all they got me to stand in front of the fire boloko and proceeded to try on me our Margarets nickers but pair after pair of these navy blue girls bloomers just set every body falling all or laughing and me roorin me eyes out. They then tried a pair of old football shorts that was miles to big anyway and looked nowt like swimming trunks. As all and sundry seemed to be getting round to the fact that they might have to go to Seniors at Deep Pits and get me a pair of trunks from the Whitsontide fund savings Mrs bleedin Scott from next door came in and said it was easy all they had to do was sew up the Neck Hole of an old pull-ore i could the then use the old arm holes as leg holes problem solved i have hated that woman ever since. Anyway Monday comes and i,m dispatched to the great Manor Top hell hole with A TOWEL and inside the towel my new! trunks complete with snake belt which was to be used to keep the previous pull-or from falling down and exposing my crown jewels. Ten o clock comes and we are all given a penny for the tram fare to Park Baths on Duke Street, We elite the tram and are marched with military precision into the unknown world of a swimming baths. Right you lot shouts Attilla get undressed and stand in a line i want to look at you to make sure you are clean before you go through to the pool. We all stood there holding our hands in front of our willies while Gratton inspected us .He dispatched half of us of to a big pot sink to have a wesh along with a clip or two just to be going on with. Then came the coupe de grace the pulling on of the trunks, the whole F----g class started pointing at my recycled pullore and snake belt and even the horrible t--t Gratton was laughing is F-----g head off i could have crawled up my own arse. After all the mirth had calmed down it was through to the 25 yards of swimming pool that is Park Baths but before you actually got to the pool side you had to walk through a trough of disinfectant and this made your feet tingle so as you reached the side of the pool you was hopping about from one leg to the other. Well to cut a long story short Gratton informed us that we were going to jump in the shallow end which was 3ft 6ind deep and not to go near the deep end which was 6ft deep and we would drown if we ventured there. So we all lined up at the 3ft 6ins end and prepared for one of the most traumatic events of our poor young lives and Gratton shouted jump. Some of us who had been in ponds and that before jumped some of us who had a deep fear of the unknown didn't i was one of the unjumpers [so to speak] and all of a sudden Gratton the B-----d kicked me up the arse and i went flying in . Guess what my pullover come trunks inc snake belt shot of like s--t of a shovel i nearly drowned[wished i had] and Gratton pulled me out with large pole that had some kind of net on the end the whole place was once again in an uproar . I Did learn to swim at Park Baths in the end but to this day hate swimming and when i ever i pass the place i look the other way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kidorry Posted May 16, 2011 Share Posted May 16, 2011 Brilliant.Brings back a few memories,like when you dived in with those woollen trunks on you had to hold them with one hand,or,else. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Texas Posted May 16, 2011 Share Posted May 16, 2011 Great story cuttsie, I had a pair of woolen swimming trunks that, when wet,weighed a ton. Being from Pitsmoor our local baths was Corporation Street. I suppose it could be termed the world's smallest public swimming baths, two lengths was 50 yards, and I had a certificate to prove it. Like you I was never a good swimmer, speed wise that is, but I can plod on for a mile or so today. But it took me years to get it right, especially the crawl. I learned at Corporation St by fear. I climbed on one of the bigger kid's shoulders, and he promptly made his way down to the deep end and dropped me off! I only went down to the bottom once and they say you go up and down three times before you drown properly. How I got to the steps I'll never know, but somebody said it was the dog paddle. I would say it was the sheer screaming panic paddle. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SILLY Posted May 16, 2011 Share Posted May 16, 2011 Never laughed so much as I can just picture it. Thankfully being a girl my first swimming costume had shoulder straps but sill being knitted when it got wet the straps stretched and the pants fell to my ankles. Good job it was in the sea with just a load of strangers and I was about 5 . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cuttsie Posted May 16, 2011 Author Share Posted May 16, 2011 Never laughed so much as I can just picture it. Thankfully being a girl my first swimming costume had shoulder straps but sill being knitted when it got wet the straps stretched and the pants fell to my ankles. Good job it was in the sea with just a load of strangers and I was about 5 . My Mr,s says the same , Her school cosi was wool she says the crotch used to be below her knees when she pulled herself out of the baths! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SILLY Posted May 16, 2011 Share Posted May 16, 2011 Another thing about the wool cosi's was that the moths liked them and I can remember mine ended up full of holes. Good job because I got a nice elasticated one it was done with shirring elastic and was like a bubble wrap suit. Today's kids just don't know how lucky they are. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kidorry Posted May 16, 2011 Share Posted May 16, 2011 My elder brother taught me how to swim by pushing me in at Corporation streetbaths.If you helped to clean the scum off the side of the pool with that bowl of pink soap they would let you stop in a bit longer.Can you remember the Brylcreem machines,if we had not got a penny we would suck it out.Revolting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cuttsie Posted May 16, 2011 Author Share Posted May 16, 2011 My elder brother taught me how to swim by pushing me in at Corporation streetbaths.If you helped to clean the scum off the side of the pool with that bowl of pink soap they would let you stop in a bit longer.Can you remember the Brylcreem machines,if we had not got a penny we would suck it out.Revolting. Every body got verrucas even though you had to walk through the disinfectant ,and at the top end the dreaded nits ,to top that of some kids had purple stuff on there heads but it all made no difference we still had to go to Park Bloody Baths. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soft ayperth Posted May 16, 2011 Share Posted May 16, 2011 Funny, hilarious story cuttsie. And I was under the impression with a name like you have on here that you are a girl. You'd think I'd be able to tell the difference. Eh? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cuttsie Posted May 16, 2011 Author Share Posted May 16, 2011 Funny, hilarious story cuttsie. And I was under the impression with a name like you have on here that you are a girl. You'd think I'd be able to tell the difference. Eh? Well Rog, it takes allsorts! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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