Rampent Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 Just a quick post to keep everyone up to date with my new role as PM. Hectic to say the least! Just had a briefing with the Queen and she appeared nonplussed with my appointment. She kept mumbling that I looked odd, and spoke in a foreign accent. I think she has a toilet problem; the constant mentioning of ‘We’ even had my bladder crossing its legs. She did laugh out loud when I put forward my immediate plans for her (moving her and Prince Shape shifter to a secure care home on Shalesmoor). I was being deadly serious, but felt it best to leave it. The corgis are on eBay at this very moment, and Buckingham Palace can be seen advertised on Davy Honest Hotspur estate agents webbo site. Rampent PM Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
manofstrad Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 Just a quick post to keep everyone up to date with my new role as PM. Hectic to say the least! Just had a briefing with the Queen and she appeared nonplussed with my appointment. She kept mumbling that I looked odd, and spoke in a foreign accent. I think she has a toilet problem; the constant mentioning of ‘We’ even had my bladder crossing its legs. She did laugh out loud when I put forward my immediate plans for her (moving her and Prince Shape shifter to a secure care home on Shalesmoor). I was being deadly serious, but felt it best to leave it. The corgis are on eBay at this very moment, and Buckingham Palace can be seen advertised on Davy Honest Hotspur estate agents webbo site. Rampent PM :hihi: That made me laugh so much a little bit of wee came out! :hihi: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rampent Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 :hihi: That made me laugh so much a little bit of wee came out! :hihi: Well, how did you think I felt! Peeing on HMS plush carpet would have got me hanged! Prince Shape shifter 'appeared' to be sat in a rather comfy chair, and a quick 'lisping' noise emanted from his mouth/orfice and a fly disappeared, as if by magic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Treatment Posted May 23, 2011 Share Posted May 23, 2011 :hihi: That made me laugh so much a little bit of wee came out! :hihi: Laugh ? I could have gone to Ethiopia - first class of course. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
denlin Posted May 23, 2011 Share Posted May 23, 2011 Could we have your views, sir, on taxing cyclists, making them pay insurance and fining them for cycling dangerously on footpaths? Only this morning two of them tried to take out the queue waiting for the tram near Ponds Forge:hihi: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
manofstrad Posted May 23, 2011 Share Posted May 23, 2011 Could we have your views, sir, on taxing cyclists, making them pay insurance and fining them for cycling dangerously on footpaths? Only this morning two of them tried to take out the queue waiting for the tram near Ponds Forge:hihi: I will be looking into providing more cycle paths in and around the city centre, this will be funded by a new 'Cycle Tax' which will be an anual tax of £95.00 levied on all cyclists between the ages of 18 months - 93 years. A further 5% will be incured by all those that insist on wearing lycra, though a discount of 50% will be given to all lycra wearing women between the ages of 17 - 25. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
denlin Posted May 23, 2011 Share Posted May 23, 2011 I will be looking into providing more cycle paths in and around the city centre, this will be funded by a new 'Cycle Tax' which will be an anual tax of £95.00 levied on all cyclists between the ages of 18 months - 93 years. A further 5% will be incured by all those that insist on wearing lycra, though a discount of 50% will be given to all lycra wearing women between the ages of 17 - 25. Would the older end of that age bracket get a reduction if accompanied by a parent, sir? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rampent Posted May 23, 2011 Share Posted May 23, 2011 I will be looking into providing more cycle paths in and around the city centre, this will be funded by a new 'Cycle Tax' which will be an anual tax of £95.00 levied on all cyclists between the ages of 18 months - 93 years. A further 5% will be incured by all those that insist on wearing lycra, though a discount of 50% will be given to all lycra wearing women between the ages of 17 - 25. I agree with the above wholesale. Plus naked women cyclists in the stated age range will get to see The PM on over night stays at Checkers and my nice new pad in Downing Street. Disclaimers will have to be signed, it would ruin the country if I fathered some kids out of wedlock. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
manofstrad Posted May 23, 2011 Share Posted May 23, 2011 Would the older end of that age bracket get a reduction if accompanied by a parent, sir? No they would be charged the same unless over the age of 93 years. This is not a charity denlin. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
denlin Posted May 23, 2011 Share Posted May 23, 2011 No they would be charged the same unless over the age of 93 years. This is not a charity denlin. No problem, your exchequerness. Would any pedestrian or tram queue en masse be able to claim from the insurer? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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