Ben Needham MEGATHREAD

[skinz]

If Ben saw himself on TV but was living with loving people that he believed were his parents would he come forward and risk the people he now loves going to prison?

 

That would only apply if he was in full knowledge of his past. That's unlikely.

 

If he's alive, the most likely scenario is like us all, just leading a normal life with normal parents.

[shaznay]

Kerrys life was changed forever that awful day 20 years ago

I will never forget it because my son was the same age as Ben...all those years of heartache and helplessness...she has been tireless in her search for him

 

I just hope to God she will one day be re-united with him (even if only temporarily)...and his grandparents of course .... before its too late

Good Luck to them in this new lead

Edited July 18, 2011 by shaznay

[Maxxy]

I wish kerry the best of luck. If it were me i would never rest if i didn't know what had happened.

[spotty dog]

To be honest I've some sympathy with Angel's view and I don't often with the stuff they say!

 

I know a criminal act has been committed as far as Ben's concerned, and his Mum & Dad have suffered years of angst and not knowing..but we don't know what kind of life he's had since he was taken, it may well have been idyllic and he loves his 'family'.

 

Put yourself in his position for a moment..what would you do if someone knocked on your door and said the only mother and father you knew had abducted you from a Greek woman you didn't know when you were a baby?

 

I'm not at all saying his Mum would be wrong in pursuing this, I may well do the same in her position, but it isn't as simple as it first appears and she has to consider what it would do to her son's future life if he ever discovered the truth.

Hmmmm... You put a good point forward...made me shed a different light on the situation.

I still think Kerry will want to follow up on the lead after all this time of searching for him.I would.I'm sure she is aware of the fact that he may not want to go back with her if he loves his family that he is with now.but on the flip side of the coin he could hate his life he has now.

[boyfriday]

Hmmmm... You put a good point forward...made me shed a different light on the situation.

I still think Kerry will want to follow up on the lead after all this time of searching for him.I would.I'm sure she is aware of the fact that he may not want to go back with her if he loves his family that he is with now.but on the flip side of the coin he could hate his life he has now.

 

I agree, and wouldn't be critical of his Mum whatever she decided to do, but it's a whole can of worms that will be opened up if he is ever found. To be honest from a selfish point of view I'd love to know what happened to him myself.

[0742Sheff]

Kerry stated on Calendar tonight that she still wants to find Ben. She isn't thick. She realizes all the points made above are there. That doesn't stop a parent wanting closure on the whole thing.

By the sound of it she would be happy just have contact once every so often.

[shaznay]

with all the publicity at the moment in greece.........I wonder if there is a young man out there thinking my god this could be me

 

surely there must be a niggling in the back of his mind, especially if the computer images of what he may look like now are fairly accurate, he may come forward himself, who knows

of course thats if he wishes to

I hope so

[CXC3000]

with all the publicity at the moment in greece.........I wonder if there is a young man out there thinking my god this could be me

 

surely there must be a niggling in the back of his mind, especially if the computer images of what he may look like now are fairly accurate, he may come forward himself, who knows

of course thats if he wishes to

I hope so

 

I doubt it.

 

And in that Wiki link I posted earlier, it says Ben had some sort of birthmark near his neck. What if the people who brought him up had gotten rid of it somehow ?

 

Not saying they did, but there is that possibility.

[Maxxy]

I think it would be wrong not to tell him his past if he is ever found. Sometimes things have to be known, even if it is distressing. Of course ben should know who his real mum is.

[boyfriday]

Kerry stated on Calendar tonight that she still wants to find Ben. She isn't thick. She realizes all the points made above are there. That doesn't stop a parent wanting closure on the whole thing.

Nobody's suggested she's thick 0742 or that she doesn't have an appreciation of all the salient issues, I'm sure she's run it through her head thousands of times.

By the sound of it she would be happy just have contact once every so often.

 

But this is the problem, it couldn't ever just be 'occasional contact every so often' like it might be if say she'd given him up for adoption. If he was abducted the people who did so have committed a serious offence, they would go to prison and Ben or Kerry could have little control over that.

 

He might well strongly resent any change in his circumstances and might blame his real parents for putting himself in a position where he was abducted in the first place. On the other hand he could well have had a miserable life with his Greek 'family', and be overjoyed by being reunited with his real one. It's a very very hard call to make but I don't think it can be addressed solely by what might be natural justice from the parents point of view.