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Worst excuse to get time off work


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Some off the staff where I work have used these

 

My rat has died

 

My cat has been run over

 

I need to go to leeds to collect a spoiler for my daughters car

 

Im having a washing machine delivered

 

My father in law is ill (he had actually died the the year before)

 

Ive got a bad back supposedly bed ridden, then going on holiday

 

Annual leave being declined then ringing in sick the same week

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Someone once told me they didn't turn up for work because they had over-laid. When I asked if they had an alarm they said no and that his mum usually wakes him up and brings him a cup of tea at the same time but she was on holiday.

 

He could not grasp the concept that perhaps in that instance he should have responsibilty of getting himself up.

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I was once waiting for a bus on my Sunday off to go into a staff meeting that seemed to happen every other Sunday. The bus was missing again, so I stood on a bridge over a really busy road, waited for a load of traffic to come by and then called work. I told them that I was with someone who's car had broken down on the motorway.

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We had a girl at work who had more time off than anyone I had ever known, if we were to believe her, she was a very sick person.

 

Things did however take a positive turn, after having a baby she was never ill again, unfortunately the baby suffers from every condition known to medical science. This of course means that mum has to have lots of time off to care for her very sickly baby. :rolleyes:

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Do this

 

Go to work

Wait a couple of hours

Tell someone you've shat yourself

Go home.

 

Even better, say you've had to get off the bus/tram because you've pooped yourself, and you're going home to get washed up and changed. They'll tell you not to bother coming in.

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The funniest was when I was working in Chesterfield in the 70's. One of the guys hadn't turned in, it was unusual for him. The phone rang and it was him calling from a public phone box in St Pancras. He has pulled a girl in Sheffield the previous evening, gone back to her place, did the deed and got on the train to get him to Chesterfield station, having had no sleep he dozed off and ended up in London. :hihi:

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