Is it worth having kids?

[Phanerothyme]

If you cannot see the point I am making, I will endeavour to spell it out.

 

Enjoyment becomes progressively more complex, as the sense of self, and general complexity of the brain and sensory inputs increases. Conversely it becomes progressively simplified as the complexity of the nervous system and sensory inputs decrease.

 

So, a simple unicellular organism has very few dimensions to its consciousness that we can take to be broadly either positive or negative 'states of mind'.

 

We can put 'enjoyment' on the positive side, rewarding reaction to stimulus. We can put pain on the negative side.

 

If cell division causes pain, the amoeba won't divide. If cell division causes enjoyment (rewarding feedback) it will.

 

Divido Ergo Sum

[chem1st]

"There's nowt to bring them into this world for.", "There's too many people", "They cost too much money" and many other lines that I often hear from people who have actually had children.

 

I often hear women without children saying that, some under 20, some under 25, some under 30, some over 30, some over 35, at about 36, they start questioning the waste of their life, if they haven't had them by then.

Then the state steps in and offers them IVF, which I do not think it should, they have have half of their adult life to breed, they chose not to. Those with genuine problems would be looking to have IVF before their 30s. The state will even allow lesbians to breed via IVF and sperm donation, which goes against family values. That should not be free on the NHS.

 

A child doesn't cost that much money. Food in this country is cheap. You can live with all your family in a room in a shared house for £60 per week. A little cramped perhaps, but you can still bring up a child/children. There are libraries to educate them, the nhs to provide healthcare.

 

I suppose the problem is, that before you have a child you want to be in a better position than your parents were, when they had you. Which for me would involve marrying at 20 and moving into a 3bed council house, before saving up and buying a house at the age of 23, having inflation (and wage inflation) pay it off by the time I'm 30, then knocking a few kids out in quick succession.

 

That lifestyle is now unaffordable to the working class. There isn't the council housing, houses aren't affordable, the inflation is there, but wage is inflation lacking, and hard to negotiate with structural unemployment, workfare and apprenticeships, ICTs etc. allowing employers to hire people from around the world and youth at lower rates for a day's labour.

 

Bringing a child into this world, is affordable, but expecting to be able to provide that child a roof over it's head it's own private space and a garden for it to play in/grow food. That, for the time being is not an option for most.

 

As the housing bubble bursts, it will become possible, as the boomers die off and sell property in their droves, it will become possible. But until then, be prepared to sleep 6 to a room. Whilst old people sit in their large houses, lonely and freezing because they can't afford to heat them.

 

And if your a women, wanting a child, don't put it off, because the best time to have one is in the age range 18-25, when you hit 30 many of us will think your past it, when your past 35, most of us will think your past it, and the risk of defects to any babies born to old mothers is not fair upon the potential child.

[virgoen18]

And if your a women, wanting a child, don't put it off, because the best time to have one is in the age range 18-25, when you hit 30 many of us will think your past it, when your past 35, most of us will think your past it, and the risk of defects to any babies born to old mothers is not fair upon the potential child.

 

Ahhh if only it were that easy. Often men are not at the same stage in their lives as women are when they are the same age. I know a number of people, myself included who want to settle down and have babies but finding a partner is the difficult part. Hence why so many women are having babies later. I don't think it's the putting it off for a career reason but because we aren't in committed relationships to be able to bring a child into the world.

[Chris_Sleeps]

I said we are 'one of the very few species of animals that like having sex'

That is recreational sex, or in biological terms it is sex outside of the "fertile window" (a wonderful term ). Higher primates are indeed in this group.

 

It is fair to say that all animals mate for pleasure, because sex is a pleasure and is so pleasureable that the act is a massive drive in all biological life. To state it the other way around, which you are doing, is to state that it isn't pleasureable and animals only do it to make offspring, which is absurd.

 

It is also possible that they do it purely for pleasure and can't conceptualise that the act does lead to offspring. When slugs can talk, we may know.

[chem1st]

Ahhh if only it were that easy. Often men are not at the same stage in their lives as women are when they are the same age. I know a number of people, myself included who want to settle down and have babies but finding a partner is the difficult part. Hence why so many women are having babies later. I don't think it's the putting it off for a career reason but because we aren't in committed relationships to be able to bring a child into the world.

 

What do you look for in partner?

 

As a man looking for a woman, she must be attractive, young (under 30), want to have children and be faithful.

 

None of those things need cost money.

[saxon51]

I had kids so that when I die there'd be three other nutters to succeed me. Can't have us 'basics' dying out, can we.

[virgoen18]

What do you look for in partner?

 

As a man looking for a woman, she must be attractive, young (under 30), want to have children and be faithful.

 

None of those things need cost money.

 

Well I'm not looking for one specific thing. Money isn't the important factor for me although a man who has a job is important. I'm not bothered about him being under 30 - i'd say up to 35 is my limit. I'm an old fashioned girl looking for love and romance and not someone just to mate with.

[chem1st]

Well I'm not looking for one specific thing. Money isn't the important factor for me although a man who has a job is important. I'm not bothered about him being under 30 - i'd say up to 35 is my limit. I'm an old fashioned girl looking for love and romance and not someone just to mate with.

 

Best of luck to you then luv

 

Hope you can have some children, especially if your White English, were a dying breed, our birth rate is below replacement level!

 

Whatever you do though, don't leave it too late.

 

The 18-25 range is the best time

[virgoen18]

If it's meant to happen for me I'm sure it will. I've learnt you can only plan your life so much the rest is kind of out of my hands.

 

Yes I am white - british. I'm already out of the peak fertility time as I'm turning 27 next month. I'm getting old:hihi:

[Hots on]

I wish the Indian and Pakistani's would slow down a bit, they're breeding like rabbits and putting a strain on the countries infrastructure.