Men that abandon their children..

[angels_fall]

im 27, ive been brought up by a lovely man who has been my dad for all these years since i was a couple of months old, i had a good up bringing although mum and dad was poor and did what they could, at times i didnt have shoes on my feet so i couldnt go to school! but i was loved and fed.

 

ive always known my dad was not my real dad, i also know that my real dad walked out on me as a baby. This past month or so, i found my real dad on facebook, he is married with 3 children, one looks like she is around 25ish, the others are below 16 and look very well provided for!

i sent him 4 messages with no reply, obvious he doesnt want to know.

 

so my message to all men out there, if you dont want a child, put something on the end of it! your are creating a life... a human being, not something that can be brushed under the carpet as if it doesnt exist, even if you dont love the mother of your child, your child still needs provided for, its not upto any other man to pick up the pieces you left behind.

 

i have all sorts running through my mind.... was i ugly, was it my fault he left?

my mum had a stroke shortly after i was born, in a wheelchair paralised for life, he knew this because my eldest sister told him, didnt he wonder how mum would cope, didnt he think that maybe i would be put into care as my mum was unable to care for me.

 

you should have stepped up and been a DAD to a child you helped create.

 

i know this man, my dad, is on here, so if you are reading oh daddy dearest, you are not worthy of the name father!

 

just remember, any sad low life can be a father, but it takes a real man to be a dad!

[MrMoran]

im 27, ive been brought up by a lovely man who has been my dad for all these years since i was a couple of months old, i had a good up bringing although mum and dad was poor and did what they could, at times i didnt have shoes on my feet so i couldnt go to school! but i was loved and fed.

 

ive always known my dad was not my real dad, i also know that my real dad walked out on me as a baby. This past month or so, i found my real dad on facebook, he is married with 3 children, one looks like she is around 25ish, the others are below 16 and look very well provided for!

i sent him 4 messages with no reply, obvious he doesnt want to know.

 

so my message to all men out there, if you dont want a child, put something on the end of it! your are creating a life... a human being, not something that can be brushed under the carpet as if it doesnt exist, even if you dont love the mother of your child, your child still needs provided for, its not upto any other man to pick up the pieces you left behind.

 

i have all sorts running through my mind.... was i ugly, was it my fault he left?

my mum had a stroke shortly after i was born, in a wheelchair paralised for life, he knew this because my eldest sister told him, didnt he wonder how mum would cope, didnt he think that maybe i would be put into care as my mum was unable to care for me.

 

you should have stepped up and been a DAD to a child you helped create.

 

i know this man, my dad, is on here, so if you are reading oh daddy dearest, you are not worthy of the name father!

 

just remember, any sad low life can be a father, but it takes a real man to be a dad!

 

My bold.

It takes to to make a baby and youd do well to remeber that!

My dad left us when i was 3. I still remember the day well some 35 years later.

"see you at the weekend son" he said.

Then that was it...gone, forever!!!

Some years later i did bump into him and got talking, i was about 12 or 13 and he was very sorry for walking out on us. It wasnt his fault and he didnt mean to hurt us and he would again see me at the weekend.

He never showed again.

Going forward more years id got a couple of kiddies myself and for some reason wanted to find him and introduce his grandkids.

I found him, he made a fuss of them for all of 5 minutes and thats it!!

Not seen him since.

That was about 6 or 7 years ago and from time to time the kids do ask why they havent got a granddad (or a gran really for the interest she shows but thats for another tread) but i just tell them they have.

I tell them that my granddad who went to sleep a long time ago watches them from the stars and will always make sure they are safe.

Seems to work for them.

Anyway im starting to ramble...

 

My opinion is if you have kids and dont look after them then you should be prevented from having more.

That goes for women too.

[angels_fall]

it takes 2 to make a child.... i agree, but he and mum was getting married and settleing down as a family, my mum did her bit as far as im concerned!

 

and of course it goes for women too, but i dont know any women that walks out on her children personally, now i know men that have walked out on thier children, me for 1! i had my first child at 16, i took the morning after pill when the condom split, i had to have a special morning after pill with my familys history of dvts, it didnt work, his father begged me to keep the child as i was booked in for a termination, so i did, we was going to get married, blah blah, my son was 3 days old when he left for a tart down the road, he never sees my son, never paid a penny, he is 10 now!

 

another, my sister was engaged to the father of her child, my nephew was 3 months old, 5 days before christmas and he left, shacked up with a scrubber tart! same applies, no money, never seen him since, my nephew is now 3 years old.

[Murphy Jnr]

Sorry you feel that way but its a bit one sided, Mothers aren't averse to doing a runner and the bond is supposedly that much stronger.

 

There are many more cases where families stay together and quite a few where children were either unexpected or not particularly wanted for selfish reasons and lo and behold it works and both parents do whatever is required.

[fruitisbad]

if these guys were willing to do this do you really think they would have been possitive influences in yours/your kids lives?

[MrMoran]

it takes 2 to make a child.... i agree, but he and mum was getting married and settleing down as a family, my mum did her bit as far as im concerned!

 

and of course it goes for women too, but i dont know any women that walks out on her children personally, .

 

Then you clearly only know half the story which probably explains your position on this.

 

i know men that have walked out on thier children, me for 1! i had my first child at 16, i took the morning after pill when the condom split, i had to have a special morning after pill with my familys history of dvts, it didnt work, his father begged me to keep the child as i was booked in for a termination, so i did, we was going to get married, blah blah, my son was 3 days old when he left for a tart down the road, he never sees my son, never paid a penny, he is 10 now!

Hes an arse!

 

another, my sister was engaged to the father of her child, my nephew was 3 months old, 5 days before christmas and he left, shacked up with a scrubber tart! same applies, no money, never seen him since, my nephew is now 3 years old.

 

Another arse!

 

Any man or women who neglects their duty in bringing up thier kids should be sterilised unless they have a damn good reason. Just to say though that because these women took your men away that does not make them tarts or scrubbers.

[Ghostrider]

Sorry you feel that way but its a bit one sided, Mothers aren't averse to doing a runner and the bond is supposedly that much stronger.

 

There are many more cases where families stay together and quite a few where childeren were either unexpected or not particularly wanted for selfish reasons and lo and behold it works and both parents do whatever is required.

True, thats what my mother did when I was born - didnt find out that my "mother" wasnt my biological mum till my 40th birthday...talk about a family secret

[MC Spyda]

You have also got to remember that as you haven't seen your Dad in all that time you will only have ever heard what your Mother has told you. It's not impossible that the Mother has twisted the truth or completely lied. It happens a lot, and it turns out that either the Father completely didn't even know about the child or has for some reason been pushed out.

 

Always remember to try and find out from both sides without Mother bias. Although I can appreciate remaining unbiased isn't easy.

[kittenta]

You have also got to remember that as you haven't seen your Dad in all that time you will only have ever heard what your Mother has told you. It's not impossible that the Mother has twisted the truth or completely lied. It happens a lot, and it turns out that either the Father completely didn't even know about the child or has for some reason been pushed out.

 

Always remember to try and find out from both sides without Mother bias. Although I can appreciate remaining unbiased isn't easy.

 

This is the reason that I have always been open and honest with my children. They know that I have never stopped them seeing their Dad, they have even seen the solicitors letters showing the days he is supposed to have them, yet refuses to do so because, apparently, he isn't my babysitter .

 

My youngest used to phone him every weekend and ask if they could see him and every weekend she would come off of the phone crying after being rejected time after time.

 

She now doesn't even bother. He may get the rare occasional call from her, she is young, but on the whole she doesn't even talk about him any more.

 

I just leave it up to the children to decide if they want to continue trying or not. As far as I'm concerned, it's him that's missing out as he isn't the greatest of role models anyway.

[WeX]

How many women get pregnant to either 1) try and trap their man or 2) get more money from the government.?

 

Its never as one sided as you make out and no matter what, you had a father, be it your biological one or not.

 

bye the way, My father walked out on me and my mum when I was 1yrs old. I was brought up by my mother and step father and am grateful for it. My real father is of no consequence to me, but then in later life, my girlfriend fell pregnant to try and save our crumbling relationship. It didnt work, but I tried for the sake of my son. Eventually we split up and I promised to visit him as much as his Mum would let me, but as soon as she shacked up with another guy, that was it. I was out of the picture and not allowed to see my son any more.

 

So, get over yourself, you had a good up bringing. It could be much much worse!