fake Posted October 15, 2011 Share Posted October 15, 2011 This is the reason that I have always been open and honest with my children. They know that I have never stopped them seeing their Dad, they have even seen the solicitors letters showing the days he is supposed to have them, yet refuses to do so because, apparently, he isn't my babysitter . Don't you think the bit in bold was an unnecessary thing to do? It seems like you are making him out to be a bad person for personal reasons. From a personal perspective I have known several woman who have been rejected by their partners and then made life hell for them as they cant cope with the situation of seeing their ex. I also have a daughter in law whose mother left her children when they were 3 so it works both ways and shows its not only men that leave. As to this quote by the OP; "so my message to all men out there, if you dont want a child, put something on the end of it!" As the male has no say or rights in any pregnancy or abortion then surely its up to the woman also to take necessary steps not to get pregnant. Any woman that has unprotected sex should know very well what the consequences could be. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Littlepink Posted October 15, 2011 Share Posted October 15, 2011 Maybe not knowing your dad is a better option than possibly being brought up in an inappropriate way! Alot of people question their childhood for whatever reason but it makes them the person they are today . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Saffy Posted October 15, 2011 Share Posted October 15, 2011 Sorry you feel that way but its a bit one sided, Mothers aren't averse to doing a runner and the bond is supposedly that much stronger. There are many more cases where families stay together and quite a few where childeren were either unexpected or not particularly wanted for selfish reasons and lo and behold it works and both parents do whatever is required. Exactly .. it's not just men that leave ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
angels_fall Posted October 15, 2011 Author Share Posted October 15, 2011 True, thats what my mother did when I was born - didnt find out that my "mother" wasnt my biological mum till my 40th birthday...talk about a family secret :o omg! :o i wouldnt have known what to do in your position xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joiner andy Posted October 15, 2011 Share Posted October 15, 2011 im 27, ive been brought up by a lovely man who has been my dad for all these years since i was a couple of months old, i had a good up bringing although mum and dad was poor and did what they could, at times i didnt have shoes on my feet so i couldnt go to school! but i was loved and fed. ive always known my dad was not my real dad, i also know that my real dad walked out on me as a baby. This past month or so, i found my real dad on facebook, he is married with 3 children, one looks like she is around 25ish, the others are below 16 and look very well provided for! i sent him 4 messages with no reply, obvious he doesnt want to know. so my message to all men out there, if you dont want a child, put something on the end of it! your are creating a life... a human being, not something that can be brushed under the carpet as if it doesnt exist, even if you dont love the mother of your child, your child still needs provided for, its not upto any other man to pick up the pieces you left behind. i have all sorts running through my mind.... was i ugly, was it my fault he left? my mum had a stroke shortly after i was born, in a wheelchair paralised for life, he knew this because my eldest sister told him, didnt he wonder how mum would cope, didnt he think that maybe i would be put into care as my mum was unable to care for me. you should have stepped up and been a DAD to a child you helped create. i know this man, my dad, is on here, so if you are reading oh daddy dearest, you are not worthy of the name father! just remember, any sad low life can be a father, but it takes a real man to be a dad! just forget him! i was in the same boat as you! the mans not a man! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cyclone Posted October 15, 2011 Share Posted October 15, 2011 im 27, ive been brought up by a lovely man who has been my dad for all these years since i was a couple of months old, i had a good up bringing although mum and dad was poor and did what they could, at times i didnt have shoes on my feet so i couldnt go to school! but i was loved and fed. ive always known my dad was not my real dad, i also know that my real dad walked out on me as a baby. This past month or so, i found my real dad on facebook, he is married with 3 children, one looks like she is around 25ish, the others are below 16 and look very well provided for! i sent him 4 messages with no reply, obvious he doesnt want to know. so my message to all men out there, if you dont want a child, put something on the end of it! You don't think that maybe both parties should consider that issue rather than only the man? your are creating a life... a human being, not something that can be brushed under the carpet as if it doesnt exist, even if you dont love the mother of your child, your child still needs provided for, its not upto any other man to pick up the pieces you left behind. i have all sorts running through my mind.... was i ugly, was it my fault he left? my mum had a stroke shortly after i was born, in a wheelchair paralised for life, he knew this because my eldest sister told him, didnt he wonder how mum would cope, didnt he think that maybe i would be put into care as my mum was unable to care for me. you should have stepped up and been a DAD to a child you helped create. i know this man, my dad, is on here, so if you are reading oh daddy dearest, you are not worthy of the name father! just remember, any sad low life can be a father, but it takes a real man to be a dad! It's a situation with no easy moral answer, but if neither party uses contraception and then they disagree about whether to keep the child or not, why should the man continue to be responsible for a child that he'd rather was terminated? Obviously it can't be his choice, it must be the mothers, but if she chooses to continue knowing his opinion, then I don't see why he should be held responsible. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cyclone Posted October 15, 2011 Share Posted October 15, 2011 it takes 2 to make a child.... i agree, but he and mum was getting married and settleing down as a family, my mum did her bit as far as im concerned! and of course it goes for women too, but i dont know any women that walks out on her children personally, now i know men that have walked out on thier children, me for 1! i had my first child at 16, i took the morning after pill when the condom split, i had to have a special morning after pill with my familys history of dvts, it didnt work, his father begged me to keep the child as i was booked in for a termination, so i did, we was going to get married, blah blah, my son was 3 days old when he left for a tart down the road, he never sees my son, never paid a penny, he is 10 now! another, my sister was engaged to the father of her child, my nephew was 3 months old, 5 days before christmas and he left, shacked up with a scrubber tart! same applies, no money, never seen him since, my nephew is now 3 years old. You seem to have anger issues that you're directing at the later partners of the absent fathers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SultryMaiden Posted October 15, 2011 Share Posted October 15, 2011 You seem to have anger issues that you're directing at the later partners of the absent fathers. They may deserve it if they are the reason these men arent dads to their kids? Just a thought Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joiner andy Posted October 15, 2011 Share Posted October 15, 2011 being abandoned brings out every emotion hurt, anger, rejection , lack of confidence etc... no excuses! if you have a kid step up to the mark! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cyclone Posted October 15, 2011 Share Posted October 15, 2011 They may deserve it if they are the reason these men arent dads to their kids? Just a thought They may not as well, if they simply started a relationship with a single guy who happened to already have a child. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.