MrsDavies2Be Posted April 1, 2012 Share Posted April 1, 2012 This is also the reason that I did not finish a College course that I enrolled on, I was looking forward to the course so much as it was something I am really interested in. I met one girl who seemed nice on the enrolment day, she did not talk to me very much after that. As it was an all female enviroment it was very bitchy at times I found the other woman hard to interact with, making classes very hard as you had to work in pairs there were about four of people I liked but two of them worked together every class and the other girls might not be there every class and I could not rely on that as you never know what will happen do you??. What if they worked together one class what would I do then?? None of the other people I liked I did not like their attitudes towards me. I felt uncomfortable every lesson and after a few weeks I dreaded going so I dropped out, I was not concentrating in class and I was not taking in what I was learning as I was on edge and nervous all the time as the weeks went on I felt like I was falling further and further behind and dreaded working together with anyone as I did not like them. Other people do not know what it is like and worst of all they don`t understand what you go through everyday you cannot explain to someone who does not experience this what it is like I wish I could then I could explain to people how they make me feel in my everyday life miserable, sad and like an outsider. :mad::sad::sad: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrsDavies2Be Posted April 1, 2012 Share Posted April 1, 2012 Then last year I was getting on the bus where I live and I let the others get off first, this woman got off the bus with someone else and she gave me a really dirty look. I got on the bus and all the way to my destination I just thought I do not know her, I had never seen her before I thought it might be the woman from before it could have been I was not sure?? again I just thought was there any need for that again I thought wtf??. :confused: :mad::rolleyes::sad: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrsDavies2Be Posted April 1, 2012 Share Posted April 1, 2012 Does anyone know of any jobs available in a Lighthouse far away off shore with accomodation attached lol??. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ediesedgwick Posted April 2, 2012 Author Share Posted April 2, 2012 I can certainly relate to this. I remember meeting up with friends years ago and feeling totally unable to take part in conversations, then I found new friends who certainly gave me the confidence to make me feel like my life was worthwhile. Sadly I eventually found that for the fourth time in my life, friends are only there while you have something to give, whether that be money, free taxi service, accommodation etc etc. So I have drifted back into having 9and wanting) no friends, except my wonderful wife. Day to day I am unable to cope with many situations - DRIVING - I find the people it brings me into contact with are so often pure arrogant bullies. BUS JOURNEYS - So stressful, every journey I take brings some drama - a certain few rude drivers, buses not completing journies, refusing to pick up, passengers cheating the system - why should I be the only one that pays ? Always winds me up to the point I can't face another journey. SF - Has me tearing my hair out. People can make racist comments, are absolutely vile, yet it is always me who has my posts deleted. It is like the entire admin team are power mad, yet they can turn they situation to make themselves out to be the victims. AUTHORITY - again, I can't cope with dealing with police, benefits agencies, doctors, council etc etc. All power crazy... no one listens, yet respond to them with the attitude they have and they throw the book at you. Only one person makes my life worth living, yet I have given so much to people thoughout my life. Social Anxiety - it is a name that includes many things, depression, anxiety, fatigue, tiredness. Society makes people that way. TOTALLY AGREE! So refreshing to know that other people know what I'm on about and the thing about authority you got it spot on! When I was on benefits they were proper horrible.. patronising and didnt give a flying **** about getting me back into work, bearing in mind I was off for months (for anxiety related issues and being that depressed I was scared of leaving my room) it made things worse... which i didnt think was possible! It is todays way of living that makes us like this I think, and the fact we have to catch up with peoples expectations of us cos were scared of getting left behind. Wish I could go back a few years to when I was full of dreams and hope, cos I work in an office (fml) and have no aspirations, am just drained It makes you feel like youve just got no energy!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ediesedgwick Posted June 21, 2012 Author Share Posted June 21, 2012 just to open up the can of worms again.. who here would think someone was attention seeking if they had a panic/anxiety attack or started getting generally upset/panicky? because half of my friends and my boyfriends brother told me the other night that when i first started hanging around with them that's what they thought... gut-wrenched that my own friends thought that, but then again i was a lot worse then and it cant be fun for others around... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ediesedgwick Posted June 21, 2012 Author Share Posted June 21, 2012 Does anyone know of any jobs available in a Lighthouse far away off shore with accomodation attached lol??. that sounds like the perfect scenario mrs davies!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mecky Posted June 21, 2012 Share Posted June 21, 2012 Is this a new term for a recluse? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
llamatron Posted June 21, 2012 Share Posted June 21, 2012 I was just wondering what peoples thoughts are on this? What is considered to be normal behaviour, generally? Social Anxiety is a taboo subject, either that or it is just pushed away because it's not normal... When people go silent during conversation or stutter and go red, when they reitterate things they have already said, or even just worry about going out of the house.. is this something that affects you? I have a lot of friends and a very active social life don't get me wrong, but I have suffered from this since I was about 13. I am now 21. It affects everything, my self image, getting on public transport, going out (pubs are a nightmare unless I'm off my head ha).. Any views or your own personal stories would be much appreciated. I used to be like that-it was just overwhelming shyness. Drunkness definitely helped! reading further on the thread some of it sounds like agoraphobia, so whats the difference? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ediesedgwick Posted June 21, 2012 Author Share Posted June 21, 2012 I used to be like that-it was just overwhelming shyness. Drunkness definitely helped! reading further on the thread some of it sounds like agoraphobia, so whats the difference? Haha drinking does help, but the morning after paranoia is awful! Same with drugs I agree with your point, but my experience is just basically constantly thinking 'everyone thinks im an idiot, im fat, im ugly, i have yellow teeth, my hair is crap, people think im weird'.. and then the sheer panic of having to be around new people or basically anyone except your closest friends. Then theres cycles of (and im not exaggerating) 1-2 weeks every so often where you really do want to end your life. Its proper dogpoo i tell thi. But, it must be hard for those that dont feel like this to understand.. Its really annoying when people think youre an attention seeker when actually you want everyone to go away and leave you alone haha! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
llamatron Posted June 21, 2012 Share Posted June 21, 2012 Haha drinking does help, but the morning after paranoia is awful! Same with drugs I agree with your point, but my experience is just basically constantly thinking 'everyone thinks im an idiot, im fat, im ugly, i have yellow teeth, my hair is crap, people think im weird'.. and then the sheer panic of having to be around new people or basically anyone except your closest friends. Then theres cycles of (and im not exaggerating) 1-2 weeks every so often where you really do want to end your life. Its proper dogpoo i tell thi. But, it must be hard for those that dont feel like this to understand.. Its really annoying when people think youre an attention seeker when actually you want everyone to go away and leave you alone haha! reading the thread its quite close to home actually, although vastly worse than how I feel. The shyness, the panic attacks, preferring to be alone than in a social situation, I have had all that. In my case I was able to change it to a certain extent just by changing my behaviour. It doesn't feel like anything that would need an official term to me but your feelings do seem similar to mine but exaggerated (as in worse, not as in I don't believe you). Most of my issues I call shyness and my panic attacks I call claustrophobia. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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