Neighbours having domestic all night every night

[shazeroo]

A young couple moved in next door just before xmas.

They seem pleasent enough to talk to but every night we hear them arguing and screaming at each other, and I believe there is violence although cant be certain. The language is revolting.

 

Now what they do in their own house is up to them, my concern is 1. they have a young baby and 2. my kids hear every word and its starting to upset them.

 

Has anyone had any experience with this - is there anyone I can speak to for advice. I dont really want to approach them and cause a scene but on the other hand if its upsetting my kids then I should say something.

 

Any advice would be great.

 

Thanks

 

Sharon

[AlyJ]

Hi Shazeroo,

 

I had a similar situation years ago when the couple next door had massive fights and arguments virtually every night. At first I asked the woman if she was ok the next day but she denied there was anything wrong even though she had massive black eyes. We didn't know how to deal with it. Eventually we phoned the police who said it was domestic and unless she made a complaint they could do nothing. I found out later that he had killed their pet dog as well. It was really horrible and I felt awful for years for not really helping the woman. About 8 years later, after I had moved house, I bumped into this couple in town and there she was with bruises on her arms and face. She looked down rather than say hello and walked on. I still feel awful, but don't think that anything we had said or done would have made a difference. It has to be their decision to sort things out, or leave. Things have probably changed a lot since then so now, I would probably have a chat to the police for advice.

[Twiglet]

I would try your local neighbourhood policing team. Things have moved on now after several similar situations have ended in tragedy, but at the very minimum this can now be dealt with as Anti-Social Behaviour. I've lived near similar neighbours where police have been called due to weapons being involved, and even if that weren't the case, hearing two people scream such vile language and abuse at each other and hearing them throwing each other around can be very distressing, particularly to children.

[laineyiow]

I used to live next to a couple who used to have serious domestics. I can't remember the number of times I rang the police. They used to come out every time but nothing ever happened and they continued having their fights. I eventually moved so not sure what happened to them.

 

Not much use to you I know in your situation. Have you ever called the police when they are having a domestic? It may have some effect or it may not!

[mrs gough]

The laws have changed regarding domestic violence, the police have more powers especially when children are involved also if the couple are violent to each other they could both be charged.

I would contact NSPCC just for advice because if it's upsetting your children just imagine how the children who have to live with it must be feeling.

[Bloomdido]

Report it to the social services duty team as well.

[mystie]

You could contact your local multi agency support team (MAST) at the council, call the switch board and ask them to direct your call they may be able to help if there is a child involved.

[shazeroo]

Thanks for the replies.

 

Ive never reported them as to be honest I didnt think much would be done. They both seem to be as bad as each other and the next day are always all over each other, so I think they would say there isnt a problem. If thats how they want to live their lives thats up to them but its the fact its affecting my kids that I have a problem with.

[shinyhappy68]

Report it to the social services duty team as well.

 

This may be your best bet, as regards to concern for the baby. I dont know if there is much else you can do without the mums consent around the domestic violence. I feel for you and your kids, its a horrible thing to have to listen too. Hope it all works out xx

[medusa]

We used to have a similar couple in one of our near neighbours. For weeks after it stopped suddenly my next door neighbour and I were trying to work out whether one of them had left or whether they were in the freezer.

 

I think that the fact that they have a baby would be my concern too though. I'd probably talk to social services and just make sure that they were aware of your concerns, even if they then decide that the child is not at risk and therefore the aren't going to get involved. They have the ability to ask questions that you may not be able to ask because of being their neighbours.