melthebell Posted May 18, 2012 Share Posted May 18, 2012 The following are all replies that Manchester women have written on Child Support Agency forms in the section for listing "father's details" or putting it another way....Who's the Daddy? These are genuine excerpts from the forms. Be sure to check out No 10. I think it takes 1st prize and No 2 is runner up. 1. Regarding the identity of the father of my twins, Makeeshia was fathered by Maclearndon McKinley I am unsure as to the identity of the father of Marlinda, but I believe that she was conceived on the same night. 2. I am unsure, as to the identity of the father of my child as I was being sick out of a window when taken unexpectedly from behind. I can provide you with a list of names of men that I think were at the party if this helps. 3. I do not know the name of the father of my little girl. She was conceived at a party at 360 East Bolton Avenue where I had sex with a man I met that night. I do remember that the sex was so good that I fainted. If you do manage to track down the father, can you please send me his phone number? Thanks. 4. I don't know the identity of the father of my daughter. He drives a BMW that now has a hole made by my stiletto in one of the door panels. Perhaps you can contact BMW service stations in this area and see if he's had it replaced. 5. I have never had sex with a man. I am still a Virginian. I am awaiting a letter from the Pope confirming that my son's conception was imaculat and that he is the Saver risen again. 6. I cannot tell you the name of Alleshia's dad as he informs me that to do so would blow his cover and that would have cataclysmic implications for the economy. I am torn between doing right by you and right by the country. Please advise... 7. Tyrone Hairston is the father of child A If you do catch up with him, can you ask him what he did with my AC/DC CDs? Child B who was also borned at the same time.... well, I don't have clue. 8. From the dates it seems that my daughter was conceived at Euro-Disney; maybe it really is the Magic Kingdom 9. So much about that night is a blur, the only thing that I remember for sure is Gordon Ramsey did a programme about eggs earlier in the evening. If I had stayed in and watched more TV rather than going to the party at 56 Miller St , mine might have remained unfertilized. 10. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of my baby, after all, like when you eat a can of beans you can't be sure which one made you fart. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teddybare Posted May 18, 2012 Share Posted May 18, 2012 Next to Manc birds Sheffield ladies got class Not a lot, but they're definitely edging it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RosyRat Posted May 18, 2012 Share Posted May 18, 2012 Reading that did me a power of good. Thanks, Mel. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mossdog Posted May 18, 2012 Share Posted May 18, 2012 And some people still wonder why the benefit culture needs sorting out! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Little Boots Posted May 18, 2012 Share Posted May 18, 2012 The following are all replies that Manchester women have written on Child Support Agency forms in the section for listing "father's details" or putting it another way....Who's the Daddy? These are genuine excerpts from the forms. Be sure to check out No 10. I think it takes 1st prize and No 2 is runner up. 1. Regarding the identity of the father of my twins, Makeeshia was fathered by Maclearndon McKinley I am unsure as to the identity of the father of Marlinda, but I believe that she was conceived on the same night. 2. I am unsure, as to the identity of the father of my child as I was being sick out of a window when taken unexpectedly from behind. I can provide you with a list of names of men that I think were at the party if this helps. 3. I do not know the name of the father of my little girl. She was conceived at a party at 360 East Bolton Avenue where I had sex with a man I met that night. I do remember that the sex was so good that I fainted. If you do manage to track down the father, can you please send me his phone number? Thanks. 4. I don't know the identity of the father of my daughter. He drives a BMW that now has a hole made by my stiletto in one of the door panels. Perhaps you can contact BMW service stations in this area and see if he's had it replaced. 5. I have never had sex with a man. I am still a Virginian. I am awaiting a letter from the Pope confirming that my son's conception was imaculat and that he is the Saver risen again. 6. I cannot tell you the name of Alleshia's dad as he informs me that to do so would blow his cover and that would have cataclysmic implications for the economy. I am torn between doing right by you and right by the country. Please advise... 7. Tyrone Hairston is the father of child A If you do catch up with him, can you ask him what he did with my AC/DC CDs? Child B who was also borned at the same time.... well, I don't have clue. 8. From the dates it seems that my daughter was conceived at Euro-Disney; maybe it really is the Magic Kingdom 9. So much about that night is a blur, the only thing that I remember for sure is Gordon Ramsey did a programme about eggs earlier in the evening. If I had stayed in and watched more TV rather than going to the party at 56 Miller St , mine might have remained unfertilized. 10. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of my baby, after all, like when you eat a can of beans you can't be sure which one made you fart. Not laughed this much for ages :hihi: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boyfriday Posted May 18, 2012 Share Posted May 18, 2012 He makes exceedingly good cakes Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melthebell Posted May 18, 2012 Author Share Posted May 18, 2012 He makes exceedingly good cakes errrrm mr kipling? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cressida Posted May 18, 2012 Share Posted May 18, 2012 Quote: 5. I have never had sex with a man. I am still a Virginian I thought it was just me - duh! Actually I think they are all having a giraffe or they were taken by one! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melthebell Posted May 18, 2012 Author Share Posted May 18, 2012 Quote: 5. I have never had sex with a man. I am still a Virginian I thought it was just me - duh! Actually I think they are all having a giraffe or they were taken by one! why? they got long necked children? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cressida Posted May 18, 2012 Share Posted May 18, 2012 why? they got long necked children? Anything's possible after those replies:gag: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.