Lucyjackson Posted August 6, 2012 Share Posted August 6, 2012 Right. About 5 years ago when I was studying at college I became quite close to one of the tutors there, nothing dodgy I just think they saw me as a bit of a teachers pet. Anyway, some of the other students there were really nasty to the tutor and i waded in in his defence (its a long story) I found that i could not continue to study the course with such immaturity taking place so filed a complaint against the perpetrators and left. When i was called in for an interview to discuss what had taken place i asked after the tutor and was told that he had taken early retirement and that my comments had hurt him deeply. I was perplexed by this and asked them to explain. The interviewer said that some of the named aggressors had said that i had said some quite nasty things to the said tutor( this is not at all true as i was the one defending him) and he was really hurt as he thought he had one true student in me who was not making his life hell. Anyway, this has plagued my conscience for years and i have tried to track him down to put the record straight, finally, i have managed to locate his address and intend to write a letter to him telling him the truth. My other half thinks i am bonkers and has said its paramount to stalking, i disagree. However, it has got me thinking and i am now doubting whether to send the letter or not. He probably will not even remember me but i can't quite get over the fact that he thought i was involved in the evilness that was taking place. What do you lot think? Do you think it is stalking or do you think that it is putting the record straight :help: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrSmith Posted August 6, 2012 Share Posted August 6, 2012 No its not, send the letter, but if you don't get a reply don't send more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucyjackson Posted August 6, 2012 Author Share Posted August 6, 2012 No its not, send the letter, but if you don't get a reply don't send more. Thanks I have no intention of sending any further letters but just need to get the truth across, that way i will know i have done all i can to set the record straight Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DaFoot Posted August 6, 2012 Share Posted August 6, 2012 Nothing wrong with sending a letter, but as MrSmith says, leave it at that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PeteMorris Posted August 6, 2012 Share Posted August 6, 2012 It's water under the bridge. Let sleeping dogs lie. It was a very long time ago. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucyjackson Posted August 6, 2012 Author Share Posted August 6, 2012 It's water under the bridge. Let sleeping dogs lie. It was a very long time ago. The thing is i can't let sleeping dogs lie, the tutor had endured some really horrific times before he came back to teaching and i can't rest thinking that he thought that i had done or said something hurtful. I know it sounds silly but i can't Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RosyRat Posted August 6, 2012 Share Posted August 6, 2012 Lucy, it's not silly. It's something you have to do or you'll regret it for the rest of your life. There's nothing wrong with setting the record straight - no-one will get hurt & it's just possible that you'll make things a whole lot better for this man. We shouldn't be afraid to communicate with other people. And I agree with the other posters here : once you've written the letter, you can leave it there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PeteMorris Posted August 6, 2012 Share Posted August 6, 2012 The thing is i can't let sleeping dogs lie, the tutor had endured some really horrific times before he came back to teaching and i can't rest thinking that he thought that i had done or said something hurtful. I know it sounds silly but i can't I understand you want to right an injustice, and without knowing (and I don't wish to know) the full circumstances it's easy for me to arrive at an arbitary 'judgement'. I suppose it wouldn't hurt to fire off a letter and explain, but be aware it might actually backfire somewhat as he may think you're just 'saying' you didn't do anything wrong, and wonder why on earth you're doing it. He may have forgotten all about it and 'moved on'. For him it might be that it's just raking up the past which he may have long since buried! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucyjackson Posted August 6, 2012 Author Share Posted August 6, 2012 Lucy, it's not silly. It's something you have to do or you'll regret it for the rest of your life. There's nothing wrong with setting the record straight - no-one will get hurt & it's just possible that you'll make things a whole lot better for this man. We shouldn't be afraid to communicate with other people. And I agree with the other posters here : once you've written the letter, you can leave it there. Once i have written the letter i will feel i can move on...if that makes sense I understand you want to right an injustice, and without knowing (and I don't wish to know) the full circumstances it's easy for me to arrive at an arbitary 'judgement'. I suppose it wouldn't hurt to fire off a letter and explain, but be aware it might actually backfire somewhat as he may think you're just 'saying' you didn't do anything wrong, and wonder why on earth you're doing it. He may have forgotten all about it and 'moved on'. For him it might be that it's just raking up the past which he may have long since buried! These are the reasons why i am not sure about it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gazza58 Posted August 6, 2012 Share Posted August 6, 2012 Lucy, it's not silly. It's something you have to do or you'll regret it for the rest of your life. There's nothing wrong with setting the record straight - no-one will get hurt & it's just possible that you'll make things a whole lot better for this man. We shouldn't be afraid to communicate with other people. And I agree with the other posters here : once you've written the letter, you can leave it there. I would go along with this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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