Jump to content

Bread... the truth!


Recommended Posts

Originally posted by Mosherchik

1. More than 98% of convicted felons are bread users

2. Fully HALF of all children who grow up in bread-consuming households score below average on standardised tests

3. More than 90% of violent crimes are committed within 24 hours of eating bread

4. Bread has been proved to be addictive. Subjects deprived of bread and given only water begged for bread after as little as two days

5. Bread is often a "gateway" food item, leading the user to "harder" items such as butter, jam, cold meat and...god forbid...marmite!

6. Newbord babies can choke on bread

7. Bread is baked at temperatures as high as 400` Fahrenheit. That kind of heat can kill an adult in less than one minute!

8. Bread has been proven to absorb water. Since the human body is more than 90% water, it follows that eating bread could lead to your body being taken over by this absorbative food product, turning you into a soggy gooey bread-pudding person!

9. Most bread eaters are utterly unable to distinguish between significant scientific fact and meaningless statistical babbling!

Anyone fancy a sandwich :wink:

 

Wholesale flour prices are on the increase so a loaf of bread could rise as much as 5p. :o

 

Bread also went up last month due to poor harvesting.

 

Stock up people. :D

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue.