Jump to content

Doctor Sam's Agony Page


Recommended Posts

Are you hungry but the chip-shop is closed? Is your cat knocking around with an undesirable? Perhaps your foot itches. Perhaps you just need advice.

 

If so, I am here to help. Please send your problem to me and I will, hopefully, help to alleviate it.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Dear Doctor Sam

 

I have just been to the local shop (a very nice one it is too),but when I had selected my chosen produce,I was aksed by a man behind a counter to hand over some money.

 

Im sure Im not alone on this problem,but the cheek of it there I was minding my own and he asked for cash.

 

Is this a new practice ?,I have always found the exchange of goods (like for like) to be an efficient way of trading.

They have even stopped me from taking in my basket of chickens,how am I meant to trade now ?.

 

Please help.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'm afraid Dick Turpin the famous highwayman started all this off with is famous 'your money or your life' threats to wealthy coach riders.

 

Obviously the person behind the counter is into wearing masks in secret and blowing smoke away form gun barrels.

 

I'd report him to the highest authority if I were you.

 

Demanding cash is nothing more than monetary rape.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just been back to the shop to reason with this guy,he became somewhat aggitated beforemaking a phone call.

Then the strangest thing happened,a small vehicular type object arrived,twas white in colour and dorned a light of the brightest blue you could imagine.

Its yellow flash down the side was of the brightest quality,(what does desk seargent mean),why do they strike me so with there towel clad hoses ?.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Oh. you mean the bobbies!!, dom yer? This is a normal get-out clause pontificated by under poilicificated metropolitan madmen with no buying power. Mark my words.

 

Quite frankly: it makes me bleedi* see.

 

Go stick a letter in an envelope and complain wildly.

 

Refer them to me. I might cry if they get stroppy but... I'll take that chance.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Dear Dr Sam

 

....All the sweet, green icing flowing down

Someone left the cake out in the rain

I don't think that I can take it

'Cause it took so long to bake it

And I'll never have that recipe again

Oh, no!

Oh, no

No, no

Oh no!!

 

wonder if that'll stir a few memories :wink:

 

Oh for the help of Delia!!!! :loopy:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue.