Sam Miguel Posted February 11, 2004 Author Share Posted February 11, 2004 Originally posted by Funky Dave Dear Dr Sam I am a busy city gentleman to whom time is money, and I was recently considering how I could become more efficient in my lifestyle. I have come to the conclusion that I could boost my productivity by up to a third if I stopped sleeping and stopped cooking food. Can you foresee any problems that I may encounter under this new, more efficient way of life? This may possibly contribute towards your untimely demise, but that's the only problem I can envisage. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mosherchik Posted February 11, 2004 Share Posted February 11, 2004 Originally posted by Sam Miguel A recent newspaper report tells of a person who was getting through 62 packets of Polo mints a day and took to frequenting forums as a way of getting them out of the habit. They are now cured, but are addicted to the internet. Is it you? I have been known to dance for polo mints in order to fund my addiction for the mint with the hole Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sam Miguel Posted February 11, 2004 Author Share Posted February 11, 2004 I strongly advise you to give up this deplorable habit. I urge you to ring my helpline 'I'm dancing for Polo Mints to fund my addiction', on: 113783009 234567 . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tango2 Posted February 11, 2004 Share Posted February 11, 2004 I have a Jaffa cake stuck in my ear,,,please help Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sam Miguel Posted February 11, 2004 Author Share Posted February 11, 2004 Oh dear. Whatever you do don't panic. You could ring the JBH ( The Jammed Biscuit Hotline) but as there is a much controversy as to their correct classification, it might well be wasting precious time if they refuse to come out on the grounds that Jaffa Cake's are indeed cakes, and not biscuits. The only positive advice I feel I can give you is to stick your head in the fridge so that the chocolate and marmalade don't go all gooey, and be extremely patient for possibly several years until a riske-free retrieval method has been invented. In the meantime, many, many Happy Birthdays and Christmases. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tango2 Posted February 11, 2004 Share Posted February 11, 2004 Thanks...brrrrr,its cold in here Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nomme Posted February 12, 2004 Share Posted February 12, 2004 Dear Dr Sam. This has been bothering me for ages. Can you help? How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Nomme Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sam Miguel Posted February 12, 2004 Author Share Posted February 12, 2004 I get people asking me this one all the time, and I always give the same answer, which is mathematically correct. 972.3 I hope I have helped. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nomme Posted February 12, 2004 Share Posted February 12, 2004 Originally posted by Sam Miguel I get people asking me this one all the time, and I always give the same answer, which is mathematically correct. 972.3 I hope I have helped. Thanks Sam. I have done some further research into this matter and it seems that an article in the Wall Street Journal reckons that the answer is 700 pounds. This seems to be at odds with your answer. Can you explain the descrpencey? For those interested check out http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a2_083a.html for another answer to this question, as well a an excellent answer to 'why does she sell sea shells on the sea shore?' regards Nomme Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
linlam Posted February 12, 2004 Share Posted February 12, 2004 Dear Dr.Sam I'm perplexed. For some reason, over the last few days, I've had, and succumbed, to the urge, of taking a shoe off in a public place, examining the nail varnish on my toes, and then tickling the sole of my foot to make me giggle. It doesn't, but I laugh and giggle anyway (I can't be seen having 'unable to tickle' fingers). This morning however, after giggling hysterically, and calling 'stop, stop!' to myself; my hand obeyed, and stopped. But then, it went to my armpits, and started tickling me there. How can I control this phenomenon:confused: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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