cutie23 Posted February 6, 2013 Share Posted February 6, 2013 How to get over a 4 year friendship where by the friend used you for your knowledge to further herself in career and lifestyle. One of my supposed best friends’s at uni whom I lived with for 4 years, changed her undergraduate course to my course and then pinched my idea of the exact course to study as a masters. I am so hurt by this it’s been 3 years since the end of our friendship and I still can’t get over the fact she did something like this to me. I study the same masters she copied me but 2 years later. As we are in the same profession I am dreading that we our cross paths in conferences which are held by the professional body of our professions. Any tips or perspectives for motivation to just let go! Thanks! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
harestone Posted February 6, 2013 Share Posted February 6, 2013 Have an herbal cigarette and chill out, it's really not worth beating yourself up about it. Regard her as a non entity in future, though at the same time gaze at her knowingly, and tap the side of your nose. Always works for me. ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NorthernStar Posted February 6, 2013 Share Posted February 6, 2013 You shouldn't let it get to you, surely one idea is just one idea and doesn't form the basis for a lifetime career; if she stole your idea then she will know that she is a fraud and will have to live with that. Should you bump into her, you can stand tall and gracefully be the bigger person because both you and her know what went on. You should let bygones be bygones and concentrate on new plans and ideas and not let the past drag you down, it's all water under the bridge. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maxmaximus Posted February 6, 2013 Share Posted February 6, 2013 How to get over a 4 year friendship where by the friend used you for your knowledge to further herself in career and lifestyle. One of my supposed best friends’s at uni whom I lived with for 4 years, changed her undergraduate course to my course and then pinched my idea of the exact course to study as a masters. I am so hurt by this it’s been 3 years since the end of our friendship and I still can’t get over the fact she did something like this to me. I study the same masters she copied me but 2 years later. As we are in the same profession I am dreading that we our cross paths in conferences which are held by the professional body of our professions. Any tips or perspectives for motivation to just let go! Thanks! Did anyone else pinch your idea or are you the only two people to ever study this course, looks like you build Mount Everest out of a mole hill, and there are billions of people with significantly bigger problems than this. Presumably you both passed and are both now working so what exactly is the problem. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gnvqsos Posted February 6, 2013 Share Posted February 6, 2013 How to get over a 4 year friendship where by the friend used you for your knowledge to further herself in career and lifestyle. One of my supposed best friends’s at uni whom I lived with for 4 years, changed her undergraduate course to my course and then pinched my idea of the exact course to study as a masters. I am so hurt by this it’s been 3 years since the end of our friendship and I still can’t get over the fact she did something like this to me. I study the same masters she copied me but 2 years later. As we are in the same profession I am dreading that we our cross paths in conferences which are held by the professional body of our professions. Any tips or perspectives for motivation to just let go! Thanks! Imitation is the most sincere form of flattery(Cheryl Cole to Victoria Beckham) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TJC1 Posted February 6, 2013 Share Posted February 6, 2013 People copy each other in every profession, get used to it. Also, studying the same thing doesnt constitute a career and a lifestyle. More than likely you will both be changing careers soon anyway. Get over it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
francypants Posted February 6, 2013 Share Posted February 6, 2013 My goodness me, wish that was all I'd got to worry about. Stop letting it eat away at you, forget about it, but if you can't and it bothers you that much then move away to a different place where you won't bump into her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gym_rat Posted February 6, 2013 Share Posted February 6, 2013 How to get over a 4 year friendship where by the friend used you for your knowledge to further herself in career and lifestyle. One of my supposed best friends’s at uni whom I lived with for 4 years, changed her undergraduate course to my course and then pinched my idea of the exact course to study as a masters. I am so hurt by this it’s been 3 years since the end of our friendship and I still can’t get over the fact she did something like this to me. I study the same masters she copied me but 2 years later. As we are in the same profession I am dreading that we our cross paths in conferences which are held by the professional body of our professions. Any tips or perspectives for motivation to just let go! Thanks! if that`s all you`ve got to worry about ..................... just kidding, seriously your life is ruined, ruined. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jfish1936 Posted February 6, 2013 Share Posted February 6, 2013 Did she borrow your course lecture notes? Did she work with you in private evening discussions? This is what a friend of mine did; in revenge, I married her! Seriously, it doesn't seem as though this friend took anything away from you; you may have shared with her, but you still had the knowledge you shared. You say "I study the same masters she copied me but 2 years later." I interpret this that you studied something at masters level, and then she studied the same, but 2 years later. Did she steal your notes, or plagiarise your presentations? You are in a profession; she is in the same. You probably are not in the same employment. Her experiences will be different from yours. At some future conference, you might be speaking on subject "A"; her work might lead to her speaking on subject "B". You would no longer be rivals. Finally, by all means cherish your resentment; it will give YOU ulcers, and not harm her. Or would you feel better to forgive her? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mecky Posted February 6, 2013 Share Posted February 6, 2013 4 years? I'm trying to overcome the split of a 33 year friendship Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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