Anna B Posted September 6, 2013 Share Posted September 6, 2013 A very sad and disturbing story in today's papers. 'A 74 year old man tried to smother his 93 yearold mother in desperation over her costly care home fees.' The man, described as 'a caring, dutiful and attentive only son,' tried to smother his mother after struggling to cope with her care home fees. He also looks after his 76 year old wife who is suffering from dementia, in spite of having had a stroke himself and suffering from diabetes. He traveled every day to see his mother in her care home. He was afraid of losing his own home to fund her fees which cost £34,000 a year. He had previously discussed his concerns over how much longer he could pay the fees with the care home manager and had been directed to the adult social services team, but they refused to assist him. 'His mother is described as frail but in good health and largely independent, and he could see himself losing his own home to pay her fees as she continued to go on and on.' Is it just me that feels angry that this sort of situation can arise? What sort of country do we live in where this is allowed to happen? And what sort of country do we live in that provides care for old people that is ridiculously unaffordable? This is a growing problem that is going to affect all of us one day and needs sorting out urgently. What do you think? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
megalithic Posted September 6, 2013 Share Posted September 6, 2013 What sort of country do we live in where this is allowed to happen? One where MP's can give themselves a 25% pension rise whilst the needy suffer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinfoilhat Posted September 7, 2013 Share Posted September 7, 2013 The social worker handling that case needs to sacked and charged with aiding and abetting attempted murder. There is absolutely no way this man and in his circumstances should have been left in that state. They might as well have held the bloody pillow themselves. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
angos Posted September 7, 2013 Share Posted September 7, 2013 A very sad and disturbing story in today's papers. 'A 74 year old man tried to smother his 93 yearold mother in desperation over her costly care home fees.' The man, described as 'a caring, dutiful and attentive only son,' tried to smother his mother after struggling to cope with her care home fees. He also looks after his 76 year old wife who is suffering from dementia, in spite of having had a stroke himself and suffering from diabetes. He traveled every day to see his mother in her care home. He was afraid of losing his own home to fund her fees which cost £34,000 a year. He had previously discussed his concerns over how much longer he could pay the fees with the care home manager and had been directed to the adult social services team, but they refused to assist him. 'His mother is described as frail but in good health and largely independent, and he could see himself losing his own home to pay her fees as she continued to go on and on.' Is it just me that feels angry that this sort of situation can arise? What sort of country do we live in where this is allowed to happen? And what sort of country do we live in that provides care for old people that is ridiculously unaffordable? This is a growing problem that is going to affect all of us one day and needs sorting out urgently. What do you think? I think if is mother is in good health and largely independent they could save money by living together in the same house. Just a thought. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
confuse Posted September 7, 2013 Share Posted September 7, 2013 Why is the son having to pay? The benefit system should pay it, word of advise when old made sure you have no money or house and claim everything off the system , this way things like this will never happen to you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anna B Posted September 7, 2013 Author Share Posted September 7, 2013 Why is the son having to pay? The benefit system should pay it, word of advise when old made sure you have no money or house and claim everything off the system , this way things like this will never happen to you People don't seem to realise that when entering a care home you are obliged to nominate a 'friend or family member' who will be responsible for paying care home fees when your own money runs out (which it will, quicker than you think, even if you have a home to sell.) This isn't a prerequisite of the care home, but of Sheffield City Council. Even if you fit all the criteria for council help, they will only pay about £400 a week towards costs, and the average cost of a care home is £600 a week. The shortfall has to be met by the nominated person. Could you afford to pay an extra £800 a month from your monthly income to keep a loved one in a home? It's a scandal, and it will affect nearly everyone sooner or later. That's why I keep banging on about care home costs, which I think are extortionate and far exceed what is reasonable. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
angos Posted September 7, 2013 Share Posted September 7, 2013 People don't seem to realise that when entering a care home you are obliged to nominate a 'friend or family member' who will be responsible for paying care home fees when your own money runs out (which it will, quicker than you think, even if you have a home to sell.) This isn't a prerequisite of the care home, but of Sheffield City Council. Even if you fit all the criteria for council help, they will only pay about £400 a week towards costs, and the average cost of a care home is £600 a week. The shortfall has to be met by the nominated person. Could you afford to pay an extra £800 a month from your monthly income? It's a scandal, and it will affect nearly everyone sooner or later. That's why I keep banging on about care home costs, which I think are extortionate and far exceed what is reasonable. It will surely only affect those people that choose to go into a care home, my granddad lived with us until he died, it didn't cost anything at all for his care. His pension and saving did increase the household income though and he was care for by people that loved him. My neighbor is in his nineties and lives alone with various members of his family coming round to care for him on a daily basis. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mammybear Posted September 7, 2013 Share Posted September 7, 2013 if we stopped sending money abroad (52m to syria) it might be able to help the elderly or sick over here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anna B Posted September 7, 2013 Author Share Posted September 7, 2013 It will surely only affect those people that choose to go into a care home, my granddad lived with us until he died, it didn't cost anything at all for his care. His pension and saving did increase the household income though and he was care for by people that loved him. My neighbor is in his nineties and lives alone with various members of his family coming round to care for him on a daily basis. I agree that it's a nice idea, but in many cases it's simply not possible if they need full time care and you have to work full time too. Depends on individual circumstances. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
angos Posted September 7, 2013 Share Posted September 7, 2013 I agree that it's a nice idea, but in many cases it's simply not possible if they need full time care and you have to work full time too. Depends on individual circumstances. How many people earn enough to pay for full time care, no point going to work for £400 a week if its costing you £600 a week to put your mother in a nursing home, you might as well quite work and do the caring yourself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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