London boys out for night in Sheffield

[JoeP]

Might I suggest starting at the West End of the North, 'The Wicker'?

 

A stroll back towards the centre of town, taking in the fine drink and tobacco to be experienced at the Market Tavern, before going through the Burbery clad denizens of the Castle Quarter.

 

A short walk up West Street will soon introduce you to the flower of Yorkshire's womanhood, who can be found uttering their traditional evening greeting of 'Business, luv?' in their dulcet tones.

 

Should lap dancing be required, I believe the Sheffield Scandanavian Society hold a folk evening every Thursday. Bring your own reindeer.

 

And you should never forget the ritual greeting that all visitors should make in the middle of West Street, at 11-00pm on a Friday night, preferbly after a local derby football match. Walk in to the centre of the street and, waiting for a lull in the noise, shout out 'You northern nancies. Barnsley is better than Wednesday, and Doncaster Rovers is better than United.' This should be yelled repeatedly until the attention of the locals is obtained. At that point, find a young lady with her beau, leer at her and pinch her bottom.

 

Sheffield has two fine NHS Trusts, and a range of private health care facilities.

 

[sugarnspice]

6 city traders are looking to go out for a night in sheffield in the next couple of weeks. i dont know how the northern lads play it, but we are looking to spend a lot of money with some good looking girls who can show us the best places in town and are up for a sexy night out.

 

Please PM if you are a good looking lass and up for a great night!!

 

Tee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

(Sounds fabulous)

[TattooedDoll]

Might I suggest starting at the West End of the North, 'The Wicker'?

 

A stroll back towards the centre of town, taking in the fine drink and tobacco to be experienced at the Market Tavern, before going through the Burbery clad denizens of the Castle Quarter.

 

A short walk up West Street will soon introduce you to the flower of Yorkshire's womanhood, who can be found uttering their traditional evening greeting of 'Business, luv?' in their dulcet tones.

 

Should lap dancing be required, I believe the Sheffield Scandanavian Society hold a folk evening every Thursday. Bring your own reindeer.

 

And you should never forget the ritual greeting that all visitors should make in the middle of West Street, at 11-00pm on a Friday night, preferbly after a local derby football match. Walk in to the centre of the street and, waiting for a lull in the noise, shout out 'You northern nancies. Barnsley is better than Wednesday, and Doncaster Rovers is better than United.' This should be yelled repeatedly until the attention of the locals is obtained. At that point, find a young lady with her beau, leer at her and pinch her bottom.

 

Sheffield has two fine NHS Trusts, and a range of private health care facilities.

 

 

Splendid :hihi:

[WhatsGood]

Might I suggest starting at the West End of the North, 'The Wicker'?

 

A stroll back towards the centre of town, taking in the fine drink and tobacco to be experienced at the Market Tavern, before going through the Burbery clad denizens of the Castle Quarter.

 

A short walk up West Street will soon introduce you to the flower of Yorkshire's womanhood, who can be found uttering their traditional evening greeting of 'Business, luv?' in their dulcet tones.

 

Should lap dancing be required, I believe the Sheffield Scandanavian Society hold a folk evening every Thursday. Bring your own reindeer.

 

And you should never forget the ritual greeting that all visitors should make in the middle of West Street, at 11-00pm on a Friday night, preferbly after a local derby football match. Walk in to the centre of the street and, waiting for a lull in the noise, shout out 'You northern nancies. Barnsley is better than Wednesday, and Doncaster Rovers is better than United.' This should be yelled repeatedly until the attention of the locals is obtained. At that point, find a young lady with her beau, leer at her and pinch her bottom.

 

Sheffield has two fine NHS Trusts, and a range of private health care facilities.

 

 

 

 

[Tessika]

6 city traders are looking to go out for a night in sheffield in the next couple of weeks. i dont know how the northern lads play it, but we are looking to spend a lot of money with some good looking girls who can show us the best places in town and are up for a sexy night out.

 

Please PM if you are a good looking lass and up for a great night!!

 

WTF??? god, i hope 4 ur sake ur an absolute stunner with cases full of cash!!

[peacenlove]

I swear, posting a message like that, ya'll better be FINE as! Plus, sounds like you're looking for a 'lady of the night', there's plenty of them to be found around sheffield, don't think advertising for one on SheffieldForum is the best way about it though!

[lastlaugh]

6 city traders are looking to go out for a night in sheffield in the next couple of weeks. i dont know how the northern lads play it, but we are looking to spend a lot of money with some good looking girls who can show us the best places in town and are up for a sexy night out.

 

Please PM if you are a good looking lass and up for a great night!!

 

Please accept my invitation to come to The Last Laugh Comedy Club, in the heart of the city centre. We'll get you and your escorts a lovely table at the front, and Toby won't mention anything.

[bjshooter]

I swear, posting a message like that, ya'll better be FINE as! Plus, sounds like you're looking for a 'lady of the night', there's plenty of them to be found around sheffield, don't think advertising for one on SheffieldForum is the best way about it though!

 

Ewww don't say that I was just talking to this guy, (and no I didn't reply to this thread:loopy: ) I would like to clarify I am not a lady of the night Must be my name.

[peacenlove]

Oops, the name is a bit dodgy bjshooter:o ! Didn't mean anyone on this forum was a pro tho!haha! At least I hope not! "We're looking to spend lots of cash as long as you're good looking and up for a sexy night out", what type of girls that gonna attract! Seriously, if you lot are that desirable with all your cash and confidence that fit girls are gonna reply, then why are you advertising for girls to take out with you? Why don't you just go out and 'hand pick' them!? I'm sure you'll be beating them off with a stick!

[Don_Kiddick]

Tips for Southerners coming North for whatever purpose

 

1. Save all your beef fat. You will be instructed later how to use it.

 

2. If you forget a Northerner's name, refer to him (or her) as "Love"

 

3. Just because you can't drive on snow and ice does not mean we always have to give you lifts everywhere.

 

4. If you do run your car into a ditch, don't panic. Four men in > the cab of a four wheel drive with a 12-pack of Carly Special and a tow chain will be along shortly. Don't try to help them. Just stay out of their way. This is what they live for.

 

5. Don't be surprised to find video rentals and bait in the same store.

 

6. Do not try to buy fresh pasta. Thump in gob tends to offend..

 

7. If it can't be fried in lard, it ain't worth cooking.

 

8. Remember: "Us" is singular. "Thaa" is plural. "Thaas" is plural possessive.

 

9. There is nothing sillier than a Southerner imitating a northern accent, unless it is a northerner imitating a Brummie accent.

 

10. Get used to hearing, "Tha not from around here, are tha?"

 

11. People walk slower.

 

12. Don't be worried that you don't understand anyone. They don't understand you either.

 

13. The first Northern expression to creep into a transplanted Southerner's vocabulary "me ducks", Eighty-five percent end their new northern influenced dialect with this expression. One hundred percent are in denial about it.

 

14. The proper pronunciation you learned in school is no longer proper.

 

15. Be advised: The "He were a southern bugger" ia a legal defence up here.

 

16. If attending a funeral in the north take your baseball hat off when everyone else does.

 

17. If you hear a Northern kid exclaim, "Ayup, come and look at this!" stay out of his way. These are likely the last words he will say before the explosion.

 

18. Most Northerners do not use turn signals, and they ignore those who do. In fact, if you see a signal blinking on a car with a northern licence plate, you may rest assured that it was on when the car was purchased.

 

19. Southerners can be identified by the spit on the inside of their car's windscreen that comes from yelling at other drivers.

 

20. The summer wardrobe you always brought out in April can wait til June.

 

21. If there is the prediction of the slightest chance of even the most minuscule accumulation of sun, your presence is required at the local chemist. It does not matter if you need anything from there, it is just something you're supposed to do.

 

22. Satellite dishes are very popular in the North. When you purchase one, it is to be positioned directly in front of your caravan. This is logical, bearing in mind that the dish cost considerably more than the caravan and should, therefore, be displayed.

 

23. Blizzards and Northerners going through a divorce have a lot in common. In either case, you know someone is going to lose a caravan.

 

24. Leeds does NOT have a castle, no matter how often you ask us.

 

25. In Northern churches you will hear the hymn, "Come All Ye Faithful". You will also hear expressions such as, "Bugger me, Lord", "God knows", "Jesus wept!" and "God help the poor cow ".

 

26. As you are cursing the person driving 15 mph in a 55 mph zone, directly in the middle of the road, remember, many folks learned to drive on a model of vehicle known as a Reliant Robin, and this is the proper speed and lane position for the vehicle.

 

27. You can ask a Northerner for directions, but unless you already know the positions of key piles of rubble, canals, coal mines, railway crossings, and where factories used to stand, you're better off trying to find it yourself.