Have you ever been bullied?

[Solomon1]

Have you ever been bullied at school? Or was you the bully??why did you do it??

 

 

I was bullied at school was usual comments, spat at and pushing and shoving got to the point where I used to skip school or not go at all. My mum went to school to complain but it made things worse so I never went to school ended up getting my mum in trouble. Now I have no confidence in myself to communicate with other people its like im shy and weak and soft.

 

Poor you

 

I've been bullied all my feckin life. Now people think twice about pushing me around.

 

Fight back dude! No-one's gonna do it for you

[Jim117]

I was bullied (me and mate were only long haired "loppers" in a school of 2 thousand kids) and well remember the gut churning feeling when the bell was due to change lessons. This meant we had to run the gauntlet at the height of the mod/skinhead craze. At one point I was going to school with a length of motorbike chain under my jacket as a deterrent. Eventually we took to hunting the worst culprits down when they were on their own and found out they were'nt so brave without their gang. When older never tolerated bullying and neither did my by then much larger group of mates.

[Powerage]

I was bullied several times at school by different people mostly boys strangely enough (being a girl). Started when I was four by one boy who used to wait for me as I left school and punch me in the stomach, this ended when I told my mum. Then I was actually bullied by a teacher who used to single me out in class and also pulled my hair quite badly once, needless to say she didn't last long as I think she must have been doing it to other kids as well. Another lad used to get the whole class to sing songs about me, that ended thankfully when he moved away, this was all at Junior School. later on several kids did try to bully me but by this time I had learned to stand up for myself and put a stop to it. I still get upset thinking about it but I was a child and it has helped me a lot to learn to stand up to people.

[Native lad]

When I was 5 or 6 years old, I would walk to school with my best friend. A couple of streets down the road, about two thirds of the way to school, a bully would occasionally wait on the street corner. He was probably about four or more years older than us and not from our school. My friend always had nice toys and would always carry something cool to school. Sometimes the bully attempted to take my friends toys. Once he took the Arran bobble hat my gran had knitted. I was most annoyed, so told my parents. The next day, my dad followed us to school, gave the bully a stern telling off and a good kicking (in the shins: a tactic that the bully would often use). I got my hat back, my friend got one of his toys back, and we were never bothered by that lad again - we never saw him again (hopefully, he got ironed out by a car).

 

At the same school, about the same time, there were triplets that would pick on me. They were also a few years older. One day one of them scratched my face, like a girl, and drew blood. For that, they all got caned, and whimpered off in tears, like little girls. They never bothered me again, from that point on.

 

To all parents, I would say you need to start disciplining your children as soon as they are old enough to understand your words - certainly from the age of two. You need to be stern and consistent, so they don't become little arse holes and a burden on the community in later years.

 

Bring back corpral punishment in schools, but with greater regulation. That would greatly reduce obnoxious behaviour and perhaps more people would be attracted to and remain in teaching within schools. After all, there are parents who just can't bring themselves to discipline their children, on principle, based on their own selfish beliefs, so the only discipline their children are likely to receive is at school. Also, bullys that repeatedly torment others should be sent to a borstal (old style), without delay or further opportunity to reform (say, upon occurrence of their third or fourth offence), and should not be allowed back in to any "normal" school once reformed, but admitted to a school for reformed borstal pupils. Any record of this should be destroyed once school leaving age is achieved, so as to improve the person's chances of getting work.

 

Perhaps when the number of individual pupils acting as bullys reaches a specific threshold locally or nationally, statutory regulation of breeding should be imposed and remain in force until a statistically significant reduction in both the number of bullys and the number of adults of breeding age with a selfish attitude toward child discipline is achieved. This sounds extreme, and ridiculous, but now the social norms of previous generations have largely disintegrated and all but totally vanished, for a broad range of reasons, perhaps we do need to take such drastic measures to ensure communities of the future can develop and function as such in a peaceful and sustainable manner. After all, if each of us is selfish and unwilling to make any sacrifice for the greater good, how can any community develop or remain functional? Perhaps eejits could have their citizenship revoked and be exiled until such time as they can prove that they have reformed?

 

Some years on from the aforementioned incidents, I was living in a remote village, with houses arranged around a central village green, where there was a public telephone box in the middle, beside a road that bisected the green. Each week, I would go to the phone to call my relatives and let them know that I was ok. It was a poor village and the house where I stayed didn't have a telephone. A family of tinks lived two doors down. Whenever I went to the phone box, one of the tink lads (about 8 or 9 years old: some years younger than me) would show up with his mates and bash the phone box and make a racket to annoy me, occasionally opening the door and shouting things. Eventually, I decided to do something about it, as it was clear that nobody else was going to come to my aid (even though the living room window of almost every house looked out on to the green. Residents feared the tinks). I knew that visiting the boy's parents would achieve nothing, as they had a bad reputation. I warned the boy that should he open the door to the phone box while I was using it, just once more, I'd thump him, hard. Of course, he didn't take the threat seriously. He opened the door and I kept my word. He received the strongest blow that I have ever dished out, right in his face. The little brat whaled around the village green so loudly that he must have disturbed all residents, but nobody came to help him. Eventually, he returned home with his tears dried and his face a mess. I expected to receive a good kicking myself from the tinks, as they were well known to look out for each other, but I considered my actions both justified and worthwhile. As it happens, I was never tormented by that boy again and, credit to his folks, they realised that the boy got what he deserved. I'm afraid that with such people you must deal with them in ways that they can understand and respect.

Edited April 12, 2015 by Native lad

[bertyboop]

Never forget the first day I went to secondary.. a lass came up to me and said 'oi, u heard you want a fight with me'... bare it in mind I was the quiet one who never spoke to anyone.. I said no and she tried to start a fight. Walked into my first science lesson and 3 of them were pushing me around. Year 8 I had voice mails threatening to leave my face print in the concrete if I showed into school. Year 9, 10 a group of them would ask people on the bus if they had seen me because they were going to 'flatten me'. Year 11 I was accused of sleeping with people who I hadn't may I add.. I had nearly all the school calling me names.

 

I had quite a rich family so wondered if it was all jelousy.

I left school, and in the time from then and being in college, I went totally down hill. A drug addict boyfriend who committed suicide, a boyfriend that did things to me that he shouldn't have. I won't go into detail. I turned to cannabis, and gambling and nearly failed college, ended up being bullied more, because I wasn't in with a group.. either the chavs or the indies what ever you want to call them.

Anyway.. got into university and made a few friends, but one day I heard them talking about me, and I just went mad. I don't know if it was good or bad but with the way one of them was looking at me it sounded bad. I screamed at her and said I'd prefer it if you said it to my face. Anyway, my medical condition got in the way and I had to quit uni.

 

It felt like it was all the anger built up from being bullied at school and college that made me go off like that.

I had never had a fight in my life.. and still haven't. . Well not a street fight anyway. I felt like I wouldn't be able to punch or hurt them.

Anyway.

I met the man of my dreams and I have made a few mistakes in our relationship (no excuses but swear it's down to the bullying! !) But now we have a gorgeous little girl.

I started MMA and kick boxing last year after we had our little one, and would just love to face one of the bullies in the ring.

 

I still think about being bullied all the time, and although it's affected my confidence and the way I am bringing up my child, I will not let it happen to her.

 

I'm a down to earth but very messed up person because of this.

I haven't told you half of what happened to me, but I will go a lot further in life than 99% of the scum that made my teenage years a misery.

 

Stay strong, I'm trying xx

 

---------- Post added 26-03-2016 at 19:32 ----------

 

Can't stop shaking just thinking about it

[runningman1]

What a sad story bertyboop I'm glad you felt comfortable to share it, has it made you feel any better?

 

Regrettably, I was both of them at times during my school days. The biggest emotional impact has actually been from the bullying that I did. I was confronted once by one lad I used to give a hard time. He wasn't mean, he just explained to me how much I had impacted him. I cried.

[martin6]

Although a victim I don't think I had it particularly bad, I never showed emotion and it went away, presumably moving on to targets that would show emotion and react.

 

Having said that I'm glad I didn't have to go through the modern day emotional bullying through the internet and mobiles.

[mrcharlie]

I was bullied throughout primary school and into secondary school. Took up kick boxing in the 3rd year and pretty much became the bully myself......not clever at all. But at the time it was the only message bullies understood. Problem is you then fall in with the bad crowd, school work suffers, exams get failed then you spend the rest of your life realising that violence certainly does NOT pay.

 

It's the "rites off passage" for the foolish!

[bertyboop]

What a sad story bertyboop I'm glad you felt comfortable to share it, has it made you feel any better?

 

Regrettably, I was both of them at times during my school days. The biggest emotional impact has actually been from the bullying that I did. I was confronted once by one lad I used to give a hard time. He wasn't mean, he just explained to me how much I had impacted him. I cried.

 

 

Thanks. Never told anyone, my parents knew it was happening, just not how bad it got or how it affected me. Yes made me feel a little better .

 

It's true what they say about being bullied. You remember it for the rest of your life, and bullies 90% of the time don't realise what it's doing to the victim.

[GhostRiders]

I was bullied for a number of years at school.

 

One day I'd had enough and kicked the bejesus out of the people bullying me and was never bullied (or allowed myself to be bullied) again.

 

A couple of years ago a manager at work tried bullying me and due to my past experience I took him down the disciplinary route with no fear whatsoever and won.

 

Sadly things seem to have changed. While at school after I'd taken care of the bullies my teachers, after I'd explained the circumstances took no action against me. My niece and a friend's son have both been victims of bullying at school recently (they attend the same school which I won't name for fear of upsetting the mods)

 

My friend has gone down the official route to deal with it which has achieved absolutely nothing, her son is still being bullied (and it's probably worse due to them having reported it). The school don't seem to want to do anything for fear of upsetting the bullies which is absolutely ridiculous.

 

My niece did what I did and took matters into her own hands. The school suspended her and she's still getting bullied because the bullies know the school is backing them, not the victim. My brother took the matter to the police (the bullying is both physical and mental) who promptly told him it was a school matter.

 

Nobody seems to want to take responsibility for anything anymore. I hope those of you who have children being bullied manage to get it resolved, it really is a horrible thing.