Children's homes or orphanages in Sheffield

[SputnikBoy]

I have just finished going through this thread completely and I have thought about the cruelty that went on in FCH. In No. 8 we were relatively sheltered from this.

Miss Humphreys was not a cruel person but she had one fault that I believe should be ignored.

Sputnic said that the times were different, where cruelty was concerned. It was!

Unfortunately a lot of us were already schooled in cruelty, we, my siblings and I, lived through, watching the torture of my Mother and as he was at the time, my baby brother. Here on this thread I have three members of my family plus myself. I know for certain that the family outside of the home knew of the cruelty that went on because, I told them.

They chose to ignore it.

We had no option but to go into the home and quite honestly we were better off there. Our real Mother was, at the time, unable to take care of us. She had been made an outcast by our outside family long before this and because we were her children that was our fate too.

No one in our outside family have ever apologised to us, because they would have to look deep inside of their selves. In fact when I did contact one of them to try to find our roots again. I received a friendly reply, marred by a nasty remark about Mum.

I met my Mother for the first time for 30yrs a couple of years ago and she died a few months after this. During the last visit to her to her, she said, "I don't suppose, that I did everything I should have done." My reply was, that at the time she was a young woman and that now with age I could understand why she did it.

What she did do was to make a new and better life for us, which we would not have achieved if we had not been outcasts.

I am positive that this post will be echoed by other inhabitants of FCH.

Some of us were better off in the home on reflection.

I am happy that I have got this off my chest and if there is a heaven, Mum will be there.

So you. you outside and righteous family. You will never meet her!

And, you, you cruel and sadistic house mothers, who took advantage of innocent, vulnerable, frightened and outcast kids, who had suffered more than they should have, already. Did you treat your children well? I doubt it!

To the none cruel house Mothers.

Why did you not report it?

 

Well, that was well said, Rex, and, as your 'baby brother', I'm seeing for the VERY FIRST TIME in a 'millennium' your views on the FCH experience. By the way, this is NOT the only thread on FCH that I and others have contributed in ...you might want to check those out also. I'm not sure how you navigate to them ...just type 'FCH' in the search box, I guess.

 

Yes, while we can't change the past I can say that FCH left a lasting impression on me that is not ALL bad if the truth be known. Sure, like life itself, it was a mix of both good and bad and everything in between. I was fortunate for the most part that my house-parent (Miss Bower) didn't exhibit the sadistic traits of some of the other house-parents that I've read about. Make no mistake ...she COULD be strict but she tended to err more consistently on the side of reason than the alternative. But not always.

 

There were times, for instance, when we kids had to sit quietly doing absolutely nothing - no talking allowed - for no apparent reason. I mean, we were kids. It's surely against nature for kids to be made to be quiet for extended periods of time for no reason. I recall one such occasion where I simply couldn't keep my mouth closed (alas, a trait that has grown older with me ) and I whispered to one of my house-brothers. I still remember (basically) what I whispered. I said, "I don't think that it's fair that we have to sit here like a bunch of zombies saying nothing." Honest! Miss Bower came into the room, she asked who had spoken, I reluctantly confessed to 'the crime', she asked what I'd said, I told her, and consequently I lost all 'privileges' for a week.

 

Strange times ..almost a 'Dickens-like' culture. Just as strange, I also find them somewhat compelling. I often recall those experiences in 'black and white' as if they were not real but were instead a movie in which I played the part of myself. But, that's just it. Times WERE different and what would not be accepted today by society was pretty well 'the norm' back then, rightly or wrongly. We can't change that fact. Sure, some of the experiences some of us had 'played with our heads', some kids more so than others. I know how naive I was when I first entered the 'free world' for the first time after many years of being institutionalized. I was 'dumb' in a 'worldly' sense, if not academic, and I was also somewhat emotionally effected by my FCH experience. I didn't quite know how to act in many social situations/relationships and I found it difficult to express 'love' or even 'friendship' adequately. While our weekdays allowed us to integrate for a few hours with kids at school who were non-FCH residents, the major part of our lives told a different story.

 

One experience that I recall so vividly concerned YOU, Rex! You were leaving the following day for the navy (?) and you promised to come and say goodbye to me that evening. At the time we kids were under the 'care' (loose term) of Miss Herring, a relief-mother, for a few days. At bed-time (probably around 7pm) I told Miss Herring that you were coming to say goodbye. She didn't care and sent me to bed anyway. Later, as I stayed awake to listen for you, I heard a knock on the door from just below my bedroom window ..the cottages were 2-storey. I heard muffled voices and guessed that you were at the door. After a brief time I heard the door close. I crept out of bed and headed for the window. It was still light. I could see you walking up the pathway to your cottage and I wanted so badly to let you know that I was there. But I couldn't tap on the window or call out to you for fear of giving myself away to Miss Herring.

 

The next thing I was aware of was this booming voice behind me. Miss Herring had evidently heard me get out of bed and had come up the stairs to see what was going on. She was mad! I told her my reasons for getting out of bed and looking out the window but she didn't care. That woman had a heart of stone and a very masculine voice ...I'm sure she must have been a guy in drag. I remember her words as though she spoke them just a few moments ago. She said, "You're about to get some Pol (Paul?) Thompson!" That was a favorite expresson of hers which basically meant that she was about to beat you up. And, that's exactly what she did. She left me a sobbing mess. While she slapped me around and it hurt badly (I was just a little kid remember) my main reason for the sobs was the heartbreak behind the fact that I hadn't said goodbye to you.

 

Now, isn't that a sad, sad story? I told it on one of the other FCH threads way before I knew you, Rex, were still around. You might want to check it out.

 

But hey, here we are ...we survived! And - some of us anyway - didn't exactly turn out to be basket cases even though we may well have been adversely 'affected' in some way by life within an institution that we were not responsible for. I know there have been some negative areas of my life that I could have attributed partially to my past and unusual upbringing. But, I quickly add, we're all personally responsible for our actions.

 

Please, anyone who might have shared Cottage #9 with me let me hear from you. Ernest Hill ...someone has spoken about you on the board several times but you still remain as elusive as ever. Talk to me!

[glen]

does anyone know the whereabouts` of a syliva westney, she was in folwood cottage

homes. i think syliva was in number17 house, and not sure if the mother was

miss highfield`s. and i think she wore glasses.-----syliva was in the home around

1942/3 but not sure when she left. ---i was in number6 ,how i would love to chat

to her. ---p.s we were childhood sweatheart`s

Hi Brian I was in cottage 17 and the excuse for a cottage mother was Miss Barnett.This was from about 1951 to about 1955.I am sure i have heard that name.kepp thinking

[glen]

Hi to you all who went to Hunters bar school and used to go to Endcliffe park at dinner time .I remember more each time i read a thread.My teachers were Miss Buxton ,Mrs caulfield,and Mrs Giles cant remember the other one. My best friend there was Valerie Gamble.I was in cottage 17 and my name was Glenda Fearnehough, Sister of rodney and rex.bresail and sputnick boy

[glen]

I have just finished going through this thread completely and I have thought about the cruelty that went on in FCH. In No. 8 we were relatively sheltered from this.

Miss Humphreys was not a cruel person but she had one fault that I believe should be ignored.

Sputnic said that the times were different, where cruelty was concerned. It was!

Unfortunately a lot of us were already schooled in cruelty, we, my siblings and I, lived through, watching the torture of my Mother and as he was at the time, my baby brother. Here on this thread I have three members of my family plus myself. I know for certain that the family outside of the home knew of the cruelty that went on because, I told them.

They chose to ignore it.

We had no option but to go into the home and quite honestly we were better off there. Our real Mother was, at the time, unable to take care of us. She had been made an outcast by our outside family long before this and because we were her children that was our fate too.

No one in our outside family have ever apologised to us, because they would have to look deep inside of their selves. In fact when I did contact one of them to try to find our roots again. I received a friendly reply, marred by a nasty remark about Mum.

I met my Mother for the first time for 30yrs a couple of years ago and she died a few months after this. During the last visit to her to her, she said, "I don't suppose, that I did everything I should have done." My reply was, that at the time she was a young woman and that now with age I could understand why she did it.

What she did do was to make a new and better life for us, which we would not have achieved if we had not been outcasts.

I am positive that this post will be echoed by other inhabitants of FCH.

Some of us were better off in the home on reflection.

I am happy that I have got this off my chest and if there is a heaven, Mum will be there.

So you. you outside and righteous family. You will never meet her!

And, you, you cruel and sadistic house mothers, who took advantage of innocent, vulnerable, frightened and outcast kids, who had suffered more than they should have, already. Did you treat your children well? I doubt it!

To the none cruel house Mothers.

Why did you not report it?

well put Rex.I will send you a private message also.I remember not long ago that you were going to send me an email with your new address ,did we forget? please send me it soon.I often wonder if anyone in the authorities ever read these threads and ever knew what went on and maybe still going on.Maybe one day we may all get an apology,,pigs might fly eh

[bresail]

Sputnik boy,

How dare you suggest that I'm not a basket case.

It's genetically programmed that way. Big brothers have to set an anti-example to his siblings.

[Albert T Smith]

Was Fulwood Cottage Homes re-named Moor side when it because a remand centre for girls or is/was it a totally different place?

[brian1941]

Hi Brian I was in cottage 17 and the excuse for a cottage mother was Miss Barnett.This was from about 1951 to about 1955.I am sure i have heard that name.kepp thinking

-------------------------------------------------------

hi glen,-----yes miss barnett was the mother in no17,

you said you could--maybe know the person syliva, she had a scar on one

of her hands, not sure witch and it was on the top.

she had shoulder length hair, on sports day she was a very good runner,

i left homes befor her around 1954/5--that all i remember.

like i said she was in there 1940s--any more help on this , have a good

think,-

--------------------------

i have just had a great reunion in skegness this w/end 24/08/08.

tommy botham was is name, and it was 55yrs when we last met.

we went into fulwood cottage homes in the 1940s and left around

middle 1950s, tommy and his wife mary live in lincoln.

well, we talked about the past and pres`ence, shared photo`s

talk about reminiscence`ing--it does bring things back to mind

and this wonderful technol`ogy with e,mailing on laptops

what a way --getting people back together and communica`tion.

>>>good luck everyone<<<

[glen]

Hi Brother,I have tried to send you an email but it was returned saying not under this server.Please also can you send me that other address.I will also send you a private message to make sure you get it.You Baby Sister ha ha

[bresail]

I have already written that I wasn't really abused in FCH, but memories are now coming back of how the authorities were allowed to dismiss their obligations. These memories were so horrific and possibly "shameful," that I don't believe that I have told anyone the full story.

When in FCH, I had developed a love of the sea and the adventures to be had. At times we used to have ex boys holidaying with us, dressed in sailors uniform, they were, from a sea training ship, the TS Wellesley. So I "volunteered" to go there. Were my family asked for permission? I don't know. Were they even briefed about the school? Or did the children's dept sign the papers?

So off I went, thrilled with the idea of freedom and adventure to come.

I arrived in hell. A place of torture, sexual abuse and despair. It was a correctional institute for delinquent boys. I and the other "volunteers" from FCH were not aware of this before we left. We were, a lot of us anyhow, very naive, had been abandoned by our families and just wanted to leave FCH. You had a choice. Either to consent to sexual abuse by the boss of the dorm and his cronies or to be beaten up by the above. The beatings consisted of standing to attention, while you were punched about the head and if you moved, you were told that the punishment would carry on. Unconsciousness meant relief from the beatings but it could not be feigned, they had stringent tests for this.

Head down the toilet to the point of unconsciousness was another one and a modern twist was to hold a live wire in a basin of water and the chief thug would have the other wire in his hand to plunge in on command. The officers in charge did eventually become suspicious as to why the fuses kept breaking. These abuses carried on until you joined the boss's gang or you became big enough or desperate enough to retaliate and beat the boss, or at least cause enough damage to him so as to make him realise that you could hurt him.

Some poor kids spent the rest of their internment as the bosses tiger or was released when a prettier boy came along. I know that there are others on this forum who probably underwent this treatment in Wellesley and may not wish to comment, for obvious reasons.

I know the effect that this had on me, I was for a time a bully after leaving Wellesley for which I apologise.

Another effect is that the only thing that may create an angry response in me is when I see bullying going on.

Did the childcare dept. really care?

Who did care?

If this post does offend, then I will remove it but, I am glad that after all these years I've told this story.

[Albert T Smith]

Now look to your own future and learn from your memory's.

What did happen, happened. It is now up to you, to get yourself into a position where it can never happen to someone else.