Advise/Opinion on Releationship Male Perspective welcomed

[*Belle*]

He lives with someone but from what I know it's more financial and comfort rather than physical

 

:hihi::hihi: Mug

 

Tell him that your husband has now seen the texts and the last time you saw him he was heading for Chesterfield with a lump hammer.

[Mecky]

i dunno.

 

she aint the one thats cheating.

 

How do you work that one out?

[jane91]

Any advice I would be greatful for but please keep the trashing of the situation out of this, I do understand it's not good/correct to cheat.

 

If I could just remind a couple of people please

Edited December 26, 2014 by esme
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[buddysbuddy]

We've had a few mid week breaks over the last year and are planning a week away abroad in the new year, we do get on really well when we're together, I think the fact we've not been able to be in touch as much as normal due to christmas and he being at home, ( he works in Chesterfield monday - Thursday and goes home for the weekends)

 

I think I'm just a bit confused that even though he has effectively got caught he still wants to carry on

 

can I suggest , he has been caught out at least once-- if he comes to you can you ever be sure that you are the one or could he find someone else? he has the track record.

[ubermaus]

I've been seeing a guy for just over a year now. He lives with someone but from what I know it's more financial and comfort rather than physical although I'm not daft enough to believe this 100%.

 

Anyway, recently his partner started reading his messages and found our texts to each other. Although he has had to reduce the amount of messages he is still wanting us to keep seeing each other, and before the reply of cake & eat it our releationship isn't just physical infact far from it!

 

Although he has got to keep a low profile whilst at home he still sends me texts when he can and even sent one at 6.58am this morning just to wish me a happy christmas and he'd be thinking about me.

 

I suppose I'd like an opinion on what others thought about "us" as although I don't think he would leave his partner ( there not married and there's no kids) I'm struggleing to see where this is heading.

 

Any advice I would be greatful for but please keep the trashing of the situation out of this, I do understand it's not good/correct to cheat.

 

Sounds like you feel guilty but also want to continue seeing this man who is obv playing you. Why dont you go away and sort your self esteem issues out first before getting into a relationship or you will get hurt.

[pintsized]

Do you go out together and do things as a couple? If the other woman he lives with is just for financial reasons I don't see why she would be bothered by your relationship or why you would need to keep it on the down low.

 

I would end this relationship and find someone who will love and treat you as you deserve. Life is too short for anything less.

[jane91]

We do go out as a couple and do things as a couple, I know his partner obviously still cares about him or she would surely have kicked him out but I also know that financially she would be in a very difficult position.

 

I don't know what to think anymore

[lil-minx92]

Give him the ultimatum..her or me. See what he does. If he doesn't choose you you can always keep seeing him anyway....but at least you know who he prefers

[SmartMarts]

I hate to say this, but just the fact that you are asking strangers to comment on your situation on Christmas Day should be the only answer that you need.

 

Unless you want to spend all your Christmas Days like this, ditch the user and find yourself a partner who wants to be with you unconditionally.

[Mister M]

We do go out as a couple and do things as a couple, I know his partner obviously still cares about him or she would surely have kicked him out but I also know that financially she would be in a very difficult position.

 

I don't know what to think anymore

 

Can I ask Jane, do you think that he would put up with his wife/girlfriend's philandering?

I doubt that many people on here, or anywhere would want to be in the situation you're in. I was & I hated it.

It sounds like he knows his wife won't leave him because financially she feels dependent on him. I'm not sure what you get out of it.....Personally I'd rather be on my own.