End of life care

[medusa]

My OH works in end of life care for the NHS and I can tell you that where he works, at least, they do try to give as much dignity and calm to the patient as possible. I can't guarantee the same for everywhere, but it's not the sort of field that encourages people without compassion into the work,

[phil752]

I would like to die consciously, awake.

Not asleep in a coma or drugged.

 

Usually, you die because of a disease, age-related or not. I've seen several, people die, 3 conscious and awake, massive trauma, but awake. Two of my parents were age-related disease, both given morphine, not so much, my mum, they just stopped treating, however, my father was in utter agony with cancer, so sleep was a relief. So unless you seek to go to a war zone and end it or seek a blunt trauma accident in a car, or get into a bad area and fall victim to bad people. You are not going to die consciously, awake. Not asleep in a coma or drugged. My view is the latter is less desirable.

[Daven]

I would like to die consciously, awake.

Not asleep in a coma or drugged.

 

Having witnessed many deaths during my career I would definitely opt for being drugged when my end comes. I really don't want to know what is going on.

On a more personal level, my lovely Mum passed away in the NGH a few months ago and the end of life care she received was exceptional.

P.s., for anyone wondering - my lovely Mum passed away with Alzheimers Disease - not all end of life patients have cancer which is what many people think.

The end of life pathway can be used for anyone whose lifes end is near and who needs input that will ensure a peaceful, painless and dignified death.

Thank you Macmillan Nurses at NGH for your input, kindness and support X

Edited June 27, 2018 by Daven

[Anna B]

One of the problems I believe, is that hospitals /doctors generally aim to preserve life and work continuously to that end, whereas for some people dying is the better option, but they are not allowed to attain it. At what point is that point reached, and who should have the final say?

 

Assuming that all the necessary controls and failsafes are in place, should we have a recognised 'Dignitas' option?

[Ms Macbeth]

One of the problems I believe, is that hospitals /doctors generally aim to preserve life and work continuously to that end, whereas for some people dying is the better option, but they are not allowed to attain it. At what point is that point reached, and who should have the final say?

 

Assuming that all the necessary controls and failsafes are in place, should we have a recognised 'Dignitas' option?

 

My mother had dementia, she had had strokes and was already in a nursing home when she developed pneumonia. The medical staff asked me how I wanted her cared for, basically I wanted her comfortable. They kept her pain free, I was with her at the end, and I believe she had a good death.

 

She was 86, her quality of life was going to be minimal if she recovered. Why would anyone wish to prolong it? I knew my mother, she was extremely pragmatic and she'd have said it was time.

[Ontarian1981]

How good is end of life care in the Uk?

 

Can it be improved?

 

Only by reversing the root cause of it.

[Michael_W]

It's an interesting one this, my mother died a year after my father, both with cancer, but my father knew he had cancer my mother did not, she did not even know my dad had passed, due to her having Alzheimers, neither had the ending they particularly wanted. My father spent his last 3 months bed ridden mostly in Weston park and his last week at St Lukes, my mother had almost a year in care at a cost of around £36K, paid from her pension and savings, she had very little left after that, and her last two months were at the NGH which she hated despite her condition.

 

We actually treat our pets better by having them put down, and that is not a dig at the staff working in care homes or the staff at the NGH, it's a dig at what as a society we consider to be a dignified ending ….. it's not that good IMHO

[Jomie]

Quote Michael_W: We actually treat our pets better by having them put down, and that is not a dig at the staff working in care homes or the staff at the NGH, it's a dig at what as a society we consider to be a dignified ending ….. it's not that good IMHO.

Spot on. The government will not legalise assistance to die and neither will it provide proper finance and care for seriously ill people, making them pay for it themselves and utilising (often free) family carers whenever possible. They sit on the fence and do nothing, taking the cowards way out.

[GoGo_dancer]

The problem with end of life is it's so unpredictable, making it nigh on impossible to plan for. We can be clear in our wishes about how we want to go but there are no guarantees in life or in death.

 

My Grandma was in the final stages of lung cancer and wanted to die at home, but she had a stroke in the early hours of the morning so my Grandad called the paramedics... it was clear she was dying so they took her to hospital and she died in the ambulance. I'm not saying the paramedics should have handled it any differently, I'm just saying you can't predict how it will play out.

 

My Step dad died in St. Luke's and the staff there were great. They knew when he was near the end and made sure he wasn't in any pain. It still wasn't a dignified or peaceful death though by any stretch.

I strongly believe we should be given the right to choose to end our own lives if we're diagnosed with a terminal / life limiting illness... anyone who argues against it needs to spend a few days in a hospice to witness it first hand.

[Anna B]

The problem with end of life is it's so unpredictable, making it nigh on impossible to plan for. We can be clear in our wishes about how we want to go but there are no guarantees in life or in death.

 

My Grandma was in the final stages of lung cancer and wanted to die at home, but she had a stroke in the early hours of the morning so my Grandad called the paramedics... it was clear she was dying so they took her to hospital and she died in the ambulance. I'm not saying the paramedics should have handled it any differently, I'm just saying you can't predict how it will play out.

 

My Step dad died in St. Luke's and the staff there were great. They knew when he was near the end and made sure he wasn't in any pain. It still wasn't a dignified or peaceful death though by any stretch.

I strongly believe we should be given the right to choose to end our own lives if we're diagnosed with a terminal / life limiting illness... anyone who argues against it needs to spend a few days in a hospice to witness it first hand.

 

I agree entirely. And old age itself is life limiting...

 

But what worries me is this government's propensity for blaming a particular group of people for all the ills in the country, and at the moment its ire seems to be directed at the 'baby boomers' who 'have had it all' and all the old people 'who are simply living too long.'

 

How long before choice, becomes a duty, and not to terminate oneself is seen as an ultimate act of selfishness.