Padders Posted September 11, 2022 Share Posted September 11, 2022 After two unusually dry summers Britain is no longer classified by the Worlds climatologists as wet and miserable, we are now listed as "Soggy and Horrid" I've had a letter from my local water company telling me not to clean my teeth or wipe my bottom. That's because were in the middle of a drought, and as per usual it's done nothing but rain... I've also had a chilling warning about using a hosepipe. Of course, everyone is now running around saying that instead of sending threating letters, the water companies should be spending some of their profits fixing leaks.... Why? The whole point of a company is to make money, not to spend every single penny it has digging up every road in the country to repair a system that is 150yr old and completely knackered, Even more annoying is the swivel eyed loonies who have blamed the water shortage on people who eat meat! They argue that thanks to climate change, south East Britain has less rainfall per head than Sudan, So What! it just means more people live in the South East than Sudan, not that they have to walk to a standpipe every morning with a bucket on their heads and flies in their eyes... On top of all this you have those who say that the Hosepipe ban is not the fault of climate change, it's down to the governments insane plan to house everyone from Ukraine, Eastern Europe, Africa, and South America in a starter home on the outskirts of Canterbury, "Thats why theres a water shortage" they say, "It's all being stolen by Somalia Pirates. So what can be done, The fact of the matter is that from 1760 Britain's rainfall has been up and down like a Whores drawers. We have a handful of very wet years, and then a handful of dry ones, And we've always managed just fine. What has changed recently is everyone is moving South, have you ever wondered why you never hear anything going on in Scunthorpe these days, it's because the entire population is living in Guildford... Whats urgently needed in the South-East is more reservoirs, and thats the problem. In the North when you build a reservoir, you lose, at worst, three small villages and a couple of Bats, But wherever you build such a thing in the South-East would mean drowning something a bit more substantial like Marlow, or Windsor Castle. What's to be done? Well, if we head back up north we find Kielder Water, one of the largest man-made lakes in Europe. It was first mooted in the 1960s so as to provide water for the heavy industry in the North-East, it was opened in 1976 just at the precise moment the last of the region's heavy industry was closing down.... Now I'm wondering how it might be possible to get some of those 44 billion gallons of water to my toothbrush.. How hard can it be, An idea first mooted some years ago was suggested that the water could be scooped into massive plastic bags and then floated, down the North sea, but when tried, they found the plastic bags sunk. No, the only way to move water from the North to the South is in pipes! And please don't tell me this can't be done, if we can get gas from Siberia to the back of my oven, without a single leak at any point of the journey, then, I'm pretty certain, we can get water from the Tyne and Wear to my lavatory bowl....... How hard can it be, you could run it offshore down the East Coast, You wouldn't even need any energy-sapping pumps because the base of the dam at Kielder Water is 460 feet higher than Central London, it would be downhill all the way. Complicated? I don't think so, Brunel could have probably designed and built such a thing in a week.. I have another idea, in places like Dubia, where the rainfall is even lower than ours, they build desalinations plants and get their water from the sea, Why can't we do this, at the very least, drinking sea water will help to keep the sea levels down... Unfortunately none of my ideas will ever come to fruition because everyone is to busy blaming Climate Change....... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cressida Posted September 11, 2022 Share Posted September 11, 2022 Way to go Padders, I've seen a nice house near Gaddams Dam Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Padders Posted September 11, 2022 Share Posted September 11, 2022 8 minutes ago, cressida said: Way to go Padders, I've seen a nice house near Gaddams Dam Does it overlook Todmorden Beach ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cressida Posted September 11, 2022 Share Posted September 11, 2022 Just now, Padders said: Does it overlook Todmorden Beach ? Yes my son went there and took photos on his phone, I love the place - it's very seasidey, went to the garden centre which was huge, and there was a restaurant. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Baron99 Posted September 11, 2022 Share Posted September 11, 2022 21 minutes ago, Padders said: After two unusually dry summers Britain is no longer classified by the Worlds climatologists as wet and miserable, we are now listed as "Soggy and Horrid" I've had a letter from my local water company telling me not to clean my teeth or wipe my bottom. That's because were in the middle of a drought, and as per usual it's done nothing but rain... I've also had a chilling warning about using a hosepipe. Of course, everyone is now running around saying that instead of sending threating letters, the water companies should be spending some of their profits fixing leaks.... Why? The whole point of a company is to make money, not to spend every single penny it has digging up every road in the country to repair a system that is 150yr old and completely knackered, Even more annoying is the swivel eyed loonies who have blamed the water shortage on people who eat meat! They argue that thanks to climate change, south East Britain has less rainfall per head than Sudan, So What! it just means more people live in the South East than Sudan, not that they have to walk to a standpipe every morning with a bucket on their heads and flies in their eyes... On top of all this you have those who say that the Hosepipe ban is not the fault of climate change, it's down to the governments insane plan to house everyone from Ukraine, Eastern Europe, Africa, and South America in a starter home on the outskirts of Canterbury, "Thats why theres a water shortage" they say, "It's all being stolen by Somalia Pirates. So what can be done, The fact of the matter is that from 1760 Britain's rainfall has been up and down like a Whores drawers. We have a handful of very wet years, and then a handful of dry ones, And we've always managed just fine. What has changed recently is everyone is moving South, have you ever wondered why you never hear anything going on in Scunthorpe these days, it's because the entire population is living in Guildford... Whats urgently needed in the South-East is more reservoirs, and thats the problem. In the North when you build a reservoir, you lose, at worst, three small villages and a couple of Bats, But wherever you build such a thing in the South-East would mean drowning something a bit more substantial like Marlow, or Windsor Castle. What's to be done? Well, if we head back up north we find Kielder Water, one of the largest man-made lakes in Europe. It was first mooted in the 1960s so as to provide water for the heavy industry in the North-East, it was opened in 1976 just at the precise moment the last of the region's heavy industry was closing down.... Now I'm wondering how it might be possible to get some of those 44 billion gallons of water to my toothbrush.. How hard can it be, An idea first mooted some years ago was suggested that the water could be scooped into massive plastic bags and then floated, down the North sea, but when tried, they found the plastic bags sunk. No, the only way to move water from the North to the South is in pipes! And please don't tell me this can't be done, if we can get gas from Siberia to the back of my oven, without a single leak at any point of the journey, then, I'm pretty certain, we can get water from the Tyne and Wear to my lavatory bowl....... How hard can it be, you could run it offshore down the East Coast, You wouldn't even need any energy-sapping pumps because the base of the dam at Kielder Water is 460 feet higher than Central London, it would be downhill all the way. Complicated? I don't think so, Brunel could have probably designed and built such a thing in a week.. I have another idea, in places like Dubia, where the rainfall is even lower than ours, they build desalinations plants and get their water from the sea, Why can't we do this, at the very least, drinking sea water will help to keep the sea levels down... Unfortunately none of my ideas will ever come to fruition because everyone is to busy blaming Climate Change....... My bold. Put a cup out each day & use the rain water to soak your dentures overnight, then save water by using that water to rinse your bottom. Don't do it the other way round. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Bloke Posted September 11, 2022 Share Posted September 11, 2022 Hmmm... Has the forum just started sponsoring posters by the word? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Box11 Posted September 12, 2022 Share Posted September 12, 2022 5 hours ago, Padders said: After two unusually dry summers Britain is no longer classified by the Worlds climatologists as wet and miserable, we are now listed as "Soggy and Horrid" I've had a letter from my local water company telling me not to clean my teeth or wipe my bottom. That's because were in the middle of a drought, and as per usual it's done nothing but rain... I've also had a chilling warning about using a hosepipe. Of course, everyone is now running around saying that instead of sending threating letters, the water companies should be spending some of their profits fixing leaks.... Why? The whole point of a company is to make money, not to spend every single penny it has digging up every road in the country to repair a system that is 150yr old and completely knackered, Even more annoying is the swivel eyed loonies who have blamed the water shortage on people who eat meat! They argue that thanks to climate change, south East Britain has less rainfall per head than Sudan, So What! it just means more people live in the South East than Sudan, not that they have to walk to a standpipe every morning with a bucket on their heads and flies in their eyes... On top of all this you have those who say that the Hosepipe ban is not the fault of climate change, it's down to the governments insane plan to house everyone from Ukraine, Eastern Europe, Africa, and South America in a starter home on the outskirts of Canterbury, "Thats why theres a water shortage" they say, "It's all being stolen by Somalia Pirates. So what can be done, The fact of the matter is that from 1760 Britain's rainfall has been up and down like a Whores drawers. We have a handful of very wet years, and then a handful of dry ones, And we've always managed just fine. What has changed recently is everyone is moving South, have you ever wondered why you never hear anything going on in Scunthorpe these days, it's because the entire population is living in Guildford... Whats urgently needed in the South-East is more reservoirs, and thats the problem. In the North when you build a reservoir, you lose, at worst, three small villages and a couple of Bats, But wherever you build such a thing in the South-East would mean drowning something a bit more substantial like Marlow, or Windsor Castle. What's to be done? Well, if we head back up north we find Kielder Water, one of the largest man-made lakes in Europe. It was first mooted in the 1960s so as to provide water for the heavy industry in the North-East, it was opened in 1976 just at the precise moment the last of the region's heavy industry was closing down.... Now I'm wondering how it might be possible to get some of those 44 billion gallons of water to my toothbrush.. How hard can it be, An idea first mooted some years ago was suggested that the water could be scooped into massive plastic bags and then floated, down the North sea, but when tried, they found the plastic bags sunk. No, the only way to move water from the North to the South is in pipes! And please don't tell me this can't be done, if we can get gas from Siberia to the back of my oven, without a single leak at any point of the journey, then, I'm pretty certain, we can get water from the Tyne and Wear to my lavatory bowl....... How hard can it be, you could run it offshore down the East Coast, You wouldn't even need any energy-sapping pumps because the base of the dam at Kielder Water is 460 feet higher than Central London, it would be downhill all the way. Complicated? I don't think so, Brunel could have probably designed and built such a thing in a week.. I have another idea, in places like Dubia, where the rainfall is even lower than ours, they build desalinations plants and get their water from the sea, Why can't we do this, at the very least, drinking sea water will help to keep the sea levels down... Unfortunately none of my ideas will ever come to fruition because everyone is to busy blaming Climate Change....... You should post like this more often... Enjoyed reading that throughly.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trastrick Posted September 12, 2022 Share Posted September 12, 2022 (edited) 14 hours ago, Padders said: After two unusually dry summers Britain is no longer classified by the Worlds climatologists as wet and miserable, we are now listed as "Soggy and Horrid" I've had a letter from my local water company telling me not to clean my teeth or wipe my bottom. That's because were in the middle of a drought, and as per usual it's done nothing but rain... I've also had a chilling warning about using a hosepipe. Of course, everyone is now running around saying that instead of sending threating letters, the water companies should be spending some of their profits fixing leaks.... Why? The whole point of a company is to make money, not to spend every single penny it has digging up every road in the country to repair a system that is 150yr old and completely knackered, Even more annoying is the swivel eyed loonies who have blamed the water shortage on people who eat meat! They argue that thanks to climate change, south East Britain has less rainfall per head than Sudan, So What! it just means more people live in the South East than Sudan, not that they have to walk to a standpipe every morning with a bucket on their heads and flies in their eyes... On top of all this you have those who say that the Hosepipe ban is not the fault of climate change, it's down to the governments insane plan to house everyone from Ukraine, Eastern Europe, Africa, and South America in a starter home on the outskirts of Canterbury, "Thats why theres a water shortage" they say, "It's all being stolen by Somalia Pirates. So what can be done, The fact of the matter is that from 1760 Britain's rainfall has been up and down like a Whores drawers. We have a handful of very wet years, and then a handful of dry ones, And we've always managed just fine. What has changed recently is everyone is moving South, have you ever wondered why you never hear anything going on in Scunthorpe these days, it's because the entire population is living in Guildford... Whats urgently needed in the South-East is more reservoirs, and thats the problem. In the North when you build a reservoir, you lose, at worst, three small villages and a couple of Bats, But wherever you build such a thing in the South-East would mean drowning something a bit more substantial like Marlow, or Windsor Castle. What's to be done? Well, if we head back up north we find Kielder Water, one of the largest man-made lakes in Europe. It was first mooted in the 1960s so as to provide water for the heavy industry in the North-East, it was opened in 1976 just at the precise moment the last of the region's heavy industry was closing down.... Now I'm wondering how it might be possible to get some of those 44 billion gallons of water to my toothbrush.. How hard can it be, An idea first mooted some years ago was suggested that the water could be scooped into massive plastic bags and then floated, down the North sea, but when tried, they found the plastic bags sunk. No, the only way to move water from the North to the South is in pipes! And please don't tell me this can't be done, if we can get gas from Siberia to the back of my oven, without a single leak at any point of the journey, then, I'm pretty certain, we can get water from the Tyne and Wear to my lavatory bowl....... How hard can it be, you could run it offshore down the East Coast, You wouldn't even need any energy-sapping pumps because the base of the dam at Kielder Water is 460 feet higher than Central London, it would be downhill all the way. Complicated? I don't think so, Brunel could have probably designed and built such a thing in a week.. I have another idea, in places like Dubia, where the rainfall is even lower than ours, they build desalinations plants and get their water from the sea, Why can't we do this, at the very least, drinking sea water will help to keep the sea levels down... Unfortunately none of my ideas will ever come to fruition because everyone is to busy blaming Climate Change....... Even the Romans managed to figure out how to get enough water to their towns. The Egyptians handled the annual Nile floods. Thousands of years ago. Are we going backwards? Will we, like the former Persian, Greek, Roman Empires, be grazing goats and sheep among the ruins of Big Ben, and Westminster Abbey, wondering who built all that monumental stuff, and why, and trying to scratch a living from the soil? Edited September 12, 2022 by trastrick Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carl Posted September 12, 2022 Share Posted September 12, 2022 20 hours ago, Padders said: After two unusually dry summers Britain is no longer classified by the Worlds climatologists as wet and miserable, we are now listed as "Soggy and Horrid" I've had a letter from my local water company telling me not to clean my teeth or wipe my bottom. That's because were in the middle of a drought, and as per usual it's done nothing but rain... I've also had a chilling warning about using a hosepipe. Of course, everyone is now running around saying that instead of sending threating letters, the water companies should be spending some of their profits fixing leaks.... Why? The whole point of a company is to make money, not to spend every single penny it has digging up every road in the country to repair a system that is 150yr old and completely knackered, Even more annoying is the swivel eyed loonies who have blamed the water shortage on people who eat meat! They argue that thanks to climate change, south East Britain has less rainfall per head than Sudan, So What! it just means more people live in the South East than Sudan, not that they have to walk to a standpipe every morning with a bucket on their heads and flies in their eyes... On top of all this you have those who say that the Hosepipe ban is not the fault of climate change, it's down to the governments insane plan to house everyone from Ukraine, Eastern Europe, Africa, and South America in a starter home on the outskirts of Canterbury, "Thats why theres a water shortage" they say, "It's all being stolen by Somalia Pirates. So what can be done, The fact of the matter is that from 1760 Britain's rainfall has been up and down like a Whores drawers. We have a handful of very wet years, and then a handful of dry ones, And we've always managed just fine. What has changed recently is everyone is moving South, have you ever wondered why you never hear anything going on in Scunthorpe these days, it's because the entire population is living in Guildford... Whats urgently needed in the South-East is more reservoirs, and thats the problem. In the North when you build a reservoir, you lose, at worst, three small villages and a couple of Bats, But wherever you build such a thing in the South-East would mean drowning something a bit more substantial like Marlow, or Windsor Castle. What's to be done? Well, if we head back up north we find Kielder Water, one of the largest man-made lakes in Europe. It was first mooted in the 1960s so as to provide water for the heavy industry in the North-East, it was opened in 1976 just at the precise moment the last of the region's heavy industry was closing down.... Now I'm wondering how it might be possible to get some of those 44 billion gallons of water to my toothbrush.. How hard can it be, An idea first mooted some years ago was suggested that the water could be scooped into massive plastic bags and then floated, down the North sea, but when tried, they found the plastic bags sunk. No, the only way to move water from the North to the South is in pipes! And please don't tell me this can't be done, if we can get gas from Siberia to the back of my oven, without a single leak at any point of the journey, then, I'm pretty certain, we can get water from the Tyne and Wear to my lavatory bowl....... How hard can it be, you could run it offshore down the East Coast, You wouldn't even need any energy-sapping pumps because the base of the dam at Kielder Water is 460 feet higher than Central London, it would be downhill all the way. Complicated? I don't think so, Brunel could have probably designed and built such a thing in a week.. I have another idea, in places like Dubia, where the rainfall is even lower than ours, they build desalinations plants and get their water from the sea, Why can't we do this, at the very least, drinking sea water will help to keep the sea levels down... Unfortunately none of my ideas will ever come to fruition because everyone is to busy blaming Climate Change....... Thanks for another entertaining read. The idea of piping water from one part of the country to another is something the Victorians came up with - they built an aqueduct (some overground and some underground) to pipe water from Wales to Birmingham. It runs entirely by gravity and amazingly it's still in use to this day. https://www.elanvalley.org.uk/discover/reservoirs-dams/birminghams-water https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-birmingham-37472263 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jeffrey Shaw Posted September 12, 2022 Share Posted September 12, 2022 48 minutes ago, Carl said: The idea of piping water from one part of the country to another is something the Victorians came up with - they built an aqueduct (some overground and some underground) to pipe water from Wales to Birmingham. It runs entirely by gravity and amazingly it's still in use to this day. https://www.elanvalley.org.uk/discover/reservoirs-dams/birminghams-water https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-birmingham-37472263 Yes. There might in fact not be a UK national shortage overall; it's just that the water is in the wrong place. (Pakistan? Life must be abysmal for its residents at present.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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