Do you hate social gatherings?

[26b-6]

On 12/10/2018 at 11:27 AM, Cyclone said:

Who is "invading" your home?  Friends and family that you have invited?

 

Hugging is fairly easy to avoid isn't it though, just don't stand too close, and tell people you're not very tactile, they'll remember and stop doing something that makes you feel uncomfortable.

Being dismissive of mental health issues that you have no experience of nor expertise in is probably some kind of disorder.

I should've probably explained a bit more in my OP instead going off on a bit of a tangent. 

 

Long story short...My daughters mum died when she was 2 years old.  She came from a big loving  affectionate family and  they have every right to see their grand daughter/ niece/ family.  My girlfriend is great with my daughter and they gelled straight way, too well.  My daughters been calling my girlfriend mum.  I've tried to hide it as  I 'sensed' predicted my daughters mum's family would object.    I don't want to ruin their relationship and upset  my daughter,  but can't find the courage and right moment to tell her, but I also know it can't continue...

On 12/10/2018 at 11:41 AM, bendix said:

 

How would you know if I have experience or not?  One person's anxiety disorder, is another person's tough day that they will just struggle through.  That's the whole point.  There is no measurable definition - it all relates to how we 'feel'.  We have been so sanitised today to explore and exaggerate our feelings that people don't feel complete without a disorder or two.

 

Whatever happened to just coping and getting on with things, even when you're feeling anxious or nervous.  On one School last week, a 13 year old girl was asked to speak in front of her class.  She couldn't, because it's a hard thing to do as a teenager.  Most of us suffered similar worries back then.  But . . lo and behold . . instead of her difficulty being attributed to being a shy teenager who didn't want to be laughed at by her classmates, her reluctance as attributed to . . . you guessed it . . .anxiety disorder.

 

There's different degrees of everything.  What one person finds unbearable is another persons walk in the park.  Eg I used to work at heights and never found it an issue. I know other people who would die of fright been forced into said situation.

Edited December 16, 2018 by 26b-6

[Cyclone]

I know you didn't ask for advice, but I'd go with whatever will make your daughter happy, not what will make your in-laws happy.  A difficult situation to be in, but your daughter hardly knew her real mum unfortunately and it's good for her that she feels that comfortable with your girlfriend.

[shanks]

On 12/10/2018 at 2:07 PM, bendix said:

Am I lacking in empathy or is that now a disorder or illness too?  Perhaps I have Empathy Deficit Disorder.    You really should be more tolerant of us people with mental illnesses.  Instead, you're just being  mean.   

 

The bottom line is everyone loves to label themselves with disorders now, disorders which frankly noone had even heard of two decades ago.  You, Cyclone, have no more ability than me to diagnose anyone based on them posting on a forum that they suffer from . . what was it . . shakes and nervousness and flushes, than I have to dismiss it.

 

Here's some advice.  Stop taking yourself so seriously.

I’ve no idea how empathetic you are.  I do know that on this thread you are appearing like a complete twonk imho.  

Let’s not let medical science or an evidence base get in the way of a 1950s view of the world though eh.  

Good luck and best wishes to all those out there who have a different outlook from that you’ve presented.