Social Care For The Elderly

[Anna B]

Trying to help an elderly relative get some help to stay in his own home. (He's fiercely independent and will not ask for help but he needs it.) Sheffield Council has a waiting list, just for an assessment, of at least 3 months or probably into the middle of next year which is no good. And trying to access anybody by phone is a none starter even if I can find a phone number. Online is awash with private care facilities/companies (he will probably be self funding) so how do you choose the right one? It looks like a minefield.

 

He's had a fall but didn't use alarm button round his neck because he refuses /fears going into hospital. There are no bones broken and he's pottering about again, but next time (and there will be one) he might not be so lucky. He's fully compus mentis but sticks rigidly to his routines to get by.  So I'm looking for recommendations for someone who can call every day to keep an eye on him and help out, without being obtrusive. Any ideas?  

Edited November 29, 2023 by Anna B

[El Cid]

48 minutes ago, Anna B said:

Trying to help an elderly relative get some help to stay in his own home. (He's fiercely independent and will not ask for help but he needs it.) Sheffield Council has a waiting list, just for an assessment, of at least 3 months or probably into the middle of next year which is no good. And trying to access anybody by phone is a none starter even if I can find a phone number. Online is awash with private care facilities/companies (he will probably be self funding) so how do you choose the right one? It looks like a minefield.

 

He's had a fall but didn't use alarm button round his neck because he refuses /fears going into hospital. There are no bones broken and he's pottering about again, but next time (and there will be one) he might not be so lucky. He's fully compus mentis but sticks rigidly to his routines to get by.  So I'm looking for recommendations for someone who can call every day to keep an eye on him and help out, without being obtrusive. Any ideas?  

I think the behaviour you describe shows that he is not "compus mentis", many elderly are not.

 

https://www.homecare.co.uk/homecare/listings.cfm/searchcountry/uk/hctype/reviews

[Anna B]

4 hours ago, El Cid said:

I think the behaviour you describe shows that he is not "compus mentis", many elderly are not.

 

https://www.homecare.co.uk/homecare/listings.cfm/searchcountry/uk/hctype/reviews

Trust me, he's still pretty sharp. But he's had quite a few stays in hospital lately and wasn't impressed, so I don't blame him for not wanting to go back in. They can't do anything to help his physical condition,; that is purely down to old age.

There is absolutely nothing to do but lie in bed for hours on end totally ignored.

 

I on the other hand am not very impressed with care homes of which I've had some experience. What they promise and what they deliver are often pols apart. The glossy brochures mean nothing. 

 

A relative who never had falls at home had two within weeks of being  admitted to a care home, the last of which broke bones which were not treated or set and she was left in a cot to die in agony, which she did some weeks later.

 

Another friend  had two serious falls in a care home, one requiring stitches in the front of his head very near his eye, the second in the back of his head, also requiring stitches and a lengthy stay in hospital. This despite the fact that he was supposed to have. and was paying a huge amount for, round the clock, one to one care. 

 

A third person, much younger, was forced to sit in the lounge with a lot of old ladies watching their choice of daytime TV, when he would much rather have been allowed to stay in his room watching his choice of films on netflix and playing computer games. He was told he'had to be sociable' when the old ladies were mostly, but not all, fast asleep in their chairs.  

 

Thankyou for the reviews which make them all look good, but remember they are all after business.  I prefer to read the full version of the CQC reports which still don't give a full picture and sometimes beg to differ. But then after all this time, I admit, I am rather cynical   

Edited November 29, 2023 by Anna B

[El Cid]

I have a 96 year relative that lives at home, he had a fall in the bedroom last week. 

He manages OK at home, but he has got confused at 3am and thought it was daytime, phoned his daughter. But the point is, his confusion has not put him in danger. A few of my aunties have been in care homes, all seemed ok. 

[Anna B]

Anyone know how to get a social worker? 

Sheffield council social care website is a confusing minefield, and phonecalls are not answered.

 

 

[Bunny Marsh]

My friend works for a company called Home Instead, it's for people who want to stay at 'home instead' of going into a care home. They cover everything from companionship, shopping, home care etc to specialist healthcare. Give them a ring on 0114 2469666. 

[Anna B]

2 hours ago, Bunny Marsh said:

My friend works for a company called Home Instead, it's for people who want to stay at 'home instead' of going into a care home. They cover everything from companionship, shopping, home care etc to specialist healthcare. Give them a ring on 0114 2469666. 

Thankyou for that Bunny. I'll give them a ring.

[zach]

My Mum/Step Dad sounds the same as your Dad.

 

 

She's very independent and does get help to stay at home. I think the hospital organised a key worker?

 

She gets attendance allowance (about £100 pw) She uses this for payments to a company to come out and help her shower etc, but they also do jobs in the house that she, and her husband can't do.

 

She also got help from the council for a stair lift and other aids (handrails)

 

Maybe the hospital or Aged UK might be worth a start into getting him the help he needs.

 

If you want, I'll ask her for some more details when we talk, and pass them on to you.

 

[Annie Bynnol]

5 hours ago, Bunny Marsh said:

My friend works for a company called Home Instead, it's for people who want to stay at 'home instead' of going into a care home. They cover everything from companionship, shopping, home care etc to specialist healthcare. Give them a ring on 0114 2469666. 

    There are(was) two 'Home Instead' franchises, covering North and South of our area.

    Not cheap but they did provide regular carers who were reliable and prompt and provided cover.

    The managers are very good at solving problems.

    It is very important to build up good relationships all round.

 

    Hospitals only get involved when 'discharging' admitted patients.

    There are no Council run homes suitable.

 

    Involve their GP/Practice straight away- they have done it before.

    Involve the Council straight away and even if they provide nothing to start with- the assessment of need builds up and most 'users', relatives etc. need to know how difficult/easy the processes are.

    Even if you can mobilize friends and family begin using a Care company.

    Don't become the carer yourself- stay at being a relative and friend.

     

    

[Anna B]

11 hours ago, Annie Bynnol said:

    There are(was) two 'Home Instead' franchises, covering North and South of our area.

    Not cheap but they did provide regular carers who were reliable and prompt and provided cover.

    The managers are very good at solving problems.

    It is very important to build up good relationships all round.

 

    Hospitals only get involved when 'discharging' admitted patients.

    There are no Council run homes suitable.

 

    Involve their GP/Practice straight away- they have done it before.

    Involve the Council straight away and even if they provide nothing to start with- the assessment of need builds up and most 'users', relatives etc. need to know how difficult/easy the processes are.

    Even if you can mobilize friends and family begin using a Care company.

    Don't become the carer yourself- stay at being a relative and friend.

     

    

Tried to involve the Council (when you can get through) but here is a waiting list for assesments and just about everything else. l've been on the phone since monday and the problems just keeps escalating as we were passed from department to department. Called an ambulance after another fall today but were told there are no beds and relative will probably  just spend time waiting on a trolley and may well be sent home again. Doctors surgery closed, so couldn't access doctor,  haven't been able to get any immediate help, so have had to become carers. I have been on the phone /internet trying to find people to