Padders Posted August 13 Share Posted August 13 Guy Fawkes, what a plonker. In the early seventeenth century the world was troubled by religious division, I know, I know, hard to believe, but there you are.. Anyway, some Catholic Brummies felt they were being persecuted by King James 1st of England and decided it would be best if he, his family and all his protestant muckers were killed. They decided, therefore, to blow up the House of Lords during the state opening of parliament, and the gunpowder plot was hatched. Unfortunately, from their point of view, there was much plague around at that time and, as a result, the state opening was delayed for six months, by which time the gunpowder had spoilt, so they went off to buy some more, and while this was happening one of the gang accidentally told some of the Kings men what they were up to.... The House of Lords and gardens were searched and in the undergrowth soldiers found Guy Fawkes standing next to a big pile of wood, he claimed he was just a servant and they went away.. But the next day he went back and the idiot was there again, so they looked under his wood and found all the gunpowder, and that was the end of that.. Fawkes, then, was a terrible terrorist, a moron, but today people of all faiths celebrate his subsequent execution by burning his effigy, eating jacket potato's, sausages rolls and keeping the neighbours awake with loud noises... Why do we do this? It's the equivalent of turning the village idiot into a superstar. Instead of executing Mr. Fawkes, they should have humiliated him and made him cut all the grass in Hyde Park with a pair of scissors, dressed as a clown, or howabout making him clean all the stained glass windows in Westminster Abbey, with his tongue. They could even have had a 1605 version of "It's a knockout" then they could have howled with Stuart Hall style laughter at him prancing about in yellow onesies and big shoes... My punishment would have been a lifetime of community work "Litter Picking" Then today, instead of this silly "Bonfire night" we could be enjoying a "National Litter picking Day" Makes sense dunt it........... 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slighty batty Posted August 13 Share Posted August 13 Lord Mounteagle (brother of one of the gang) received an anonymous letter about it warning him not to attend parliament. He was worried that he’d get implicated if it all went pear shaped, and so he grassed them up. Brothers eh, who’d have them? My burning question though (if you’ll pardon the pun) is would Bonfire Toffee have been invented if there wasn’t a bonfire night? Anything that results in bonfire toffee has to be a Good Thing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
m williamson Posted August 13 Share Posted August 13 Catholic Brummies? Guy Fawkes was a Yorkshireman, born in York and he was the last man to enter parliament with good intent. 1 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Padders Posted August 13 Author Share Posted August 13 13 minutes ago, Slighty batty said: Lord Mounteagle (brother of one/ of the gang) received an anonymous letter about it warning him not to attend parliament. He was worried that he’d get implicated if it all went pear shaped, and so he grassed them up. Brothers eh, who’d have them? My burning question though (if you’ll pardon the pun) is would Bonfire Toffee have been invented if there wasn’t a bonfire night? Anything that results in bonfire toffee has to be a Good Thing. Would bonfire toffee been invented? Probably not. But you'd still have Treacle Toffee... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RollingJ Posted August 13 Share Posted August 13 13 minutes ago, m williamson said: Catholic Brummies? Guy Fawkes was a Yorkshireman, born in York and he was the last man to enter parliament with good intent. Which was? - or am I missing something obvious? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
m williamson Posted August 13 Share Posted August 13 1 hour ago, RollingJ said: Which was? - or am I missing something obvious? Possibly 😀. He was intent on blowing it up. Given some of the less than honourable behaviour that has emanated from that building over the years maybe it wasn't such a terrible idea. For the avoidance of doubt, as the lawyers say, it was meant as a joke. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RollingJ Posted August 13 Share Posted August 13 1 minute ago, m williamson said: For the avoidance of doubt, as the lawyers say, it was meant as a joke. Kind of thought/hoped so. 👍 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PRESLEY Posted August 13 Share Posted August 13 Guy Fawkes! Its flipping August, is there going to be a Topic about Santa in flippin September. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Padders Posted August 13 Author Share Posted August 13 1 hour ago, PRESLEY said: Guy Fawkes! Its flipping August, is there going to be a Topic about Santa in flippin September. Not be long now before the next Olympic Games... 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PRESLEY Posted August 13 Share Posted August 13 42 minutes ago, Padders said: Not be long now before the next Olympic Games... The closing ceremony is the best part, Anyhow the Euros are before them. Plus I can't wait for Easter 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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