What kind of humour have you got ?

[crookesey]

Grandad’s mate, “Are you sure that so and so is dead?”
 

Grandad, “ Well they’ve buried him on the strength of it”

[Slighty batty]

My nan and her sister were walking out of City Rd cemetery one day. It had been snowing and the path was icy and slippy. Nan said “wouldn’t you have thought they’d have put some ashes down.”

[Tipstaff]

Two old ladies were at the seaside when a smart chap with a camera came walking up and pointed the camera at them.  Saying nothing, the chap remained in position and was twisting the camera lens.  "Do you think he's going to try and focus?",  said the first old lady.  "Not if I can help it!",  said the other. 🤣

[Draggletail]

18 hours ago, Delbow said:

Odd, and too dark for this place in general. Al Bundy would have a heart attack if I didn't heavily filter myself.

I'm intrigued. Maybe adjust your filter a bit and give us a taster of your humour...  

[Draggletail]

18 hours ago, lavery549@yahoo said:

OOOOO , got taxi to visit Mum in Hallamshire . The taxi driver was hilarious . He is part time , & he was having trouble with his thing that showed he had picked up a booking . He told Veezu . He said right , am off to pub after I drop you 2 off . Ended up talking about a pub he went in , had really strong beer , which hit him once he got outside . Ended up in some grass . I said , oh that reminds me of my brother , who after copious amounts of Gold Label , ended up in a rose bush at top of Tylney Road 

I used to love a Gold Lable. I sometimes asked the bar staff to serve me a half of Guiness in a pint glass and and put a Gold Lable in. I named the combination drink 'Headbanger' and my rule was never to have more than one in an evening....

[lavery549@yahoo]

2 hours ago, Draggletail said:

I used to love a Gold Lable. I sometimes asked the bar staff to serve me a half of Guiness in a pint glass and and put a Gold Lable in. I named the combination drink 'Headbanger' and my rule was never to have more than one in an evening....

Yes , it is a bit potent that Gold Label 

[lavery549@yahoo]

5 hours ago, Slighty batty said:

My nan and her sister were walking out of City Rd cemetery one day. It had been snowing and the path was icy and slippy. Nan said “wouldn’t you have thought they’d have put some ashes down.”

[Draggletail]

4 minutes ago, lavery549@yahoo said:

Yes , it is a bit potent that Gold Label 

Is it even made/for sale these days?

[lavery549@yahoo]

1 minute ago, Draggletail said:

Is it even made/for sale these days?

Yes Draggle , shall I get you a box 🤣

[Padders]

So I like to have a bit of banter with Mr. Bassett.

As you can't fail to notice he plays a big part in organising the Low Edges Festival.

So I decided last year to visit the Festival and look Mr. Bassett up.

First of all I needed a description of Mr. Bassett, so I asked him on the Forum.

He gave me a good description, his age. his good looks, his hairstyle, and he was, shall we say, a bit rotund.

But vitality he said he was 5ft-8 inches tall.

So of I went, armed with a Stanley Tape Measure.

When I arrived at the Festival, I had a good look round, but after measuring a couple of likely candidates, I was having no luck.

So I found a Steward and said "Do you know a Mr. Bassett"

He said "Yes, he's around somewhere wearing a bright red T-Shirt"

This narrowed my mission down considerably, so I started measuring people wearing bright red T-Shirts who looked a bit rolly polly.

Then, after a few unsuccessful attempts, I spotted a guy at the Burger Van in a red T-Shirt stuffing a rather large burger in his mush.

I stealthily approached him from behind, and measured him, BINGO! 5ft-8 inches, bang on.

I said, "Are you Mr. Bassett" he said "Yes, what are you doing" 

I told him I was the local undertaker and been sent to measure him up.

Mission completed.

He still mentions it on here, we had a laugh, and I might add, he's a smashing guy.