LordChaverly Posted February 4, 2007 Share Posted February 4, 2007 The last duel in UK took place in 1826 and involved a bank manager and an irate customer. I think there is a good case for reviving this manly, honourable and chivalrous practice. At present, anyone can impugn our honour, and indeed rain insults on our heads, and get away with it, unless we are rich enough to hire a lawyer and pursue the case through the courts. The present system is of course of great benefit to lawyers, but leaves many of us seething as a result of grievous wrongs unrighted. I think that the reintroduction of duelling, with pistols or swords, would not only serve to reinstate the manly virtues of courage and honour, but would also make our social interactions more courteous and civilised, for fear of being challenged to mortal combat. I do hope no one suggests some kind of namby pamby comprise, such as the usage of paint balls, laser tags or taser guns as an alternative to the weapons tradition has decreed to be most suitable for the settlement of disputes, i.e. the pistol or sword. The romance of duelling could never be complete without the prospect of crimson oozing onto white shirts, a la Scaramouche. Personally, I am quite looking forward to the prospect of saying to someone, ‘you sir, are a rogue and a bounder! I will see you at dawn tomorrow on Devonshire Green’. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StarSparkle Posted February 4, 2007 Share Posted February 4, 2007 The last duel in UK took place in 1826 and involved a bank manager and an irate customer. I think there is a good case for reviving this manly, honourable and chivalrous practice. At present, anyone can impugn our honour, and indeed rain insults on our heads, and get away with it, unless we are rich enough to hire a lawyer and pursue the case through the courts. The present system is of course of great benefit to lawyers, but leaves many of us seething as a result of grievous wrongs unrighted. I think the reintroduction of duelling, with pistols or swords, would not only serve to reinstate the manly virtues of courage and honour, but would also make our social interactions more courteous and civilised, for fear of being challenged to mortal combat. I do hope no one suggests some kind og namby pamby comprise, such as the usage of paint balls, laser tags or taser guns as an alternative to the weapons tradition has decreed to be most suitable for the settlement of disputes, i.e. the pistol or sword. The romance of duelling could never be complete without the prospect of crimson oozing onto white shirts, a la Scaramouche. Personally, I am quite looking forward to the prospect of saying to someone, ‘you sir, are a rogue and a bounder! I will see you at dawn tomorrow on Devonshire Green’. There may well be something to be said for this course of action. I'm all for manly, honourable and chivalrous practices! StarSparkle Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fr8neck Posted February 4, 2007 Share Posted February 4, 2007 Apart from the problem that those with leisure and money to practise their swordsmanship/marksmanship would have a huge advantage; though they be the most arrant rascals in Christendom: I like the idea. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tony Posted February 4, 2007 Share Posted February 4, 2007 ... of course you could always cough up £250 in a Pitsmoor pub. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
medusa Posted February 4, 2007 Share Posted February 4, 2007 In healthcare terms, we'd need to have tuition for the combatants to help with their efficiency and aim, or the hospitals are likely to be clogged up with half-dead people who are a drain on the NHS. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
slh73 Posted February 4, 2007 Share Posted February 4, 2007 Do it. They could televise it, would be better than the crap thats on Saturday nights at the minute Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StarSparkle Posted February 4, 2007 Share Posted February 4, 2007 ... of course you could always cough up £250 in a Pitsmoor pub. Tony! Do you HAVE to lower the tone? We're talking chivalric codes of behaviour here. StarSparkle Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crayfish Posted February 4, 2007 Share Posted February 4, 2007 Couldn't we just do it bare knuckled? That would even out the playing field, as the richer will be able to avoid better swords and guns, and it'd hardly be fair to put an AK47 against a flintlock. If t'were unarmed I'd be all for it though. Be fun. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
seriessix Posted February 4, 2007 Share Posted February 4, 2007 Classic Viz letters > I work in a call centre in Norwich and we've just been told our > jobs are > moving to India. I'm so excited! I've always wanted to visit India and > with the salary they pay me I'll be able to live like a Maharaja over > there. Well done Aviva, keep up the good work. Charles Turner > > > What is it with diabetics? One minute they're on the floor with a > loved > one standing by screaming "Give him some chocolate! Give him some > chocolate!" The next day someone offers them a piece of chocolate and > quick as a flash they say "No thanks, I'm diabetic." I wish they'd get > their story straight. > > T Potter > > > I wouldn't say boo to a goose. I'm not a coward, I just realise > that it > would be largely pointless. Mike Potts > > > > Why is it always people who say 'bring back hanging' > who also say 'hanging's too good for them'? Make your right wing minds > up. Christina Martin > > > > Doctors say that you should eat 5 pieces of fruit or veg a day to > remain > healthy. Last week I ate 5 mouldy plums and that night I shat the bed. > What's healthy about that? Mark J, Barnsley > > > > AM I the only person who hasn't banged Kate Moss? > Everyday the papers are full of stories from blokes claiming to have > banged her. It's something I'm quite keen on doing and I was just > wondering if there is some sort of queuing system in place. Zak > Cassidy, > e-mail > > > TO THE zookeeper in 1978 who replied "I'll tell you when you're older" > when I asked him why one of the monkeys stuck its tongue up another > one's arse: I'm 36 now and still waiting for that explanation. Joe > McKeown > > > I HAVE just returned from a diplomatic trip to the Congo and I can > testify that at no point did I see anyone drinking Um Bongo. Neil > Palmer > > > ACCORDING to the BBC website, Heather Mills has blamed the > breakdown of > her marriage to Sir Paul McCartney on 'constant intrusion' into the > couple's private life. It seems a shame that Heather objects so > much to > the public taking an interest in her personal business. If only she > had > mentioned it in one of her two published autobiographies, A Single > Step > and Out On A Limb,or the 'About Heather' section of her website > http://www.heathermillsmccartney.com , or perhaps when she sold her life > story > to the News of the World in 1993. Perhaps then the public would > have got > the message and left her to live her life out of the constant glare of > publicity. A Cherry, Leeds > > > PROFESSIONAL footballers have hit the headlines recently for indulging > in gamesmanship - diving and playacting and so on. Well at least they > are now limiting their disgraceful behaviour to the pitch these > days. It > wasn't so long ago that they were out , > dogging in > car parks and gang rap1ng women in hotel rooms. Let's give credit > where > credit is due. > > T Harpic, London > > > > THE THING that strikes me about the appointment of a paedophile to a > teaching post is, how **** must the other people at the interview have > been? T Thorne, London > > > WHY DON'T NHS bosses start hiring obsessive compulsives as nurses? > Their > attention to hygiene and constant hand washing would see an end to > MRSA > outbreaks in no time. Stu Bray > > > THEY SAY that slow and steady wins the race. B*llocks! > I am an athletics coach specialising in the 100 metre sprint, and I > find > the best tactic by far is to go as quickly as possible. Ashley Smith > > > I could never understand why Brian McFadden dumped his huge-breast3d > wife Kerry Katona. But those Iceland adverts really opened my eyes. > Wise > move. > > Martin Mannion > > > > Alton Towers - Where the magic never ends', or so the com-mercial > says. > Imagine my disappointment when it closed at 7.30. Colum Hill > > > Peter Andre might look smug in all his wedding pictures, but I'd just > like to remind him that, as a Playb0y reader, I have seen his wife's > m*nge. He hasn't seen my wife's, so who's had the last laugh? P > Lorimer, > Leeds > > > My friend's mum recently pointed out that I have the same ironing > board > cover as her. Can anyone think of a more mundane and pointless > remark to > make than this? Alun Daniel > > > When I nipped into a McDonald's to use their toilets the other day, I > was confronted by a spotty teenager mopping up vomit just by the > lavatory. On the back of his T-shirt it said 'I'm Lovin' it!', but the > poor sod's face told a different story. Tommo, Hull > > > What's all this nonsense about that 66-year-old Romanian woman > being the > world's oldest mum? My mum's 77. Beat that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tony Posted February 4, 2007 Share Posted February 4, 2007 Tony! Do you HAVE to lower the tone? We're talking chivalric codes of behaviour here. Well you already know that I pride myself on honour, decorum and proper modes of behaviour. However, as a man of modern science and since the day that Max (our resident sword expert) pulled me up about my once quite handy, but long faded foil and épée technique I decided that I should follow the fine example of toffs of yore and always pay for what I can afford instead of doing it myself - especially if it's a bit dangerous Therefore I nominate Max as my proxy by sword, and Bartfarst as my proxy by pistol. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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