Ridiculous rape laws...

[liam1412]

Hurray for Bago for speaking sense. I find it appalling the way that people focus on girls that 'cry wolf' more than they do the girls that are raped and the man gets away with it. The focus is all wrong.

 

Regretably this is a case with a lot of things. Reporting on the things that belittle our judicial and government systems. I would, however like to point out that I am not merely focussing on the girls that cry wolf but only as part of the discussion that arose from this thread. I would never start to claim that most rape cases are false, only that there are also cases where false accusations have been made completely destryong a mans life.

[squidge00]

I understand it is an important part of the argument, and probably a major concern for sensible and careful young men who like to get involved in one night stands.

 

However, my concerns are derived particulary from Mikey10;s comments, as well as having read some of the posts on the Daily Mail website, but i should know better than to take them seriously.

[hazel]

What worrries me about these situations is why a young girl, or even older woman puts herself in danger by drinking so much as to be incapable of remembering anything that happens to her.

Does she expect other people to be responsible for her safety.

Does she take none of the responsibility for herself.

Surely she does not think that the men she meets are all gentlemen or does she think she bears a charmed life.

hazel

[squidge00]

What worrries me about these situations is why a young girl, or even older woman puts herself in danger by drinking so much as to be incapable of remembering anything that happens to her.

Does she expect other people to be responsible for her safety.

Does she take none of the responsibility for herself.

Surely she does not think that the men she meets are all gentlemen or does she think she bears a charmed life.

hazel

 

WHY are you excusing men for raping women? It shouldn't matter what state she's in. NO one should rape!!!!!!!!!!!

[evildrneil]

WHY are you excusing men for raping women? It shouldn't matter what state she's in. NO one should rape!!!!!!!!!!!

 

No one should - but as most people are aware we live in a far from perfect world so isn't a little bit of precautionary soberness a good move?

[hazel]

I am not excusing men for rape I am saying if the woman hadn't drunk so much she would not have found herself in the situaion she was in.

because she has voluntary drunk to much should she be immune to what happens to her. Doesn't she bear some of the responsibility.

hazel

[squidge00]

I am not excusing men for rape I am saying if the woman hadn't drunk so much she would not have found herself in the situaion she was in.

because she has voluntary drunk to much should she be immune to what happens to her. Doesn't she bear some of the responsibility.

hazel

 

If our justice system worked in such a way that more guilty men were successfully charged for rape, then it might work as a greater deterrant.

It's unfair that the onus is on women to protect themselves. I know this is important, but there is a distinct lack of criticism against men who decide to have sex with women without consent.

[Darbees]

WHY are you excusing men for raping women? It shouldn't matter what state she's in. NO one should rape!!!!!!!!!!!

No one is excusing rape, the problem is that a court has to be sure that it is definitely rape because it has a duty to both the accuser and the defendant. Unfortunately because of the nature of the crime it is prudent for a woman to take care if she is to get so drunk she doesn't know what is going on. She may step under bus too and so may a guy but a guy can't get raped (as easily)

[hazel]

In my opinion a woman should not put herself in a stuation where she is at the mercy of anyone that comes along.

It's not a matter of having to protect herself, most young girls that I know are very good at protecting themseves both by words or deeds.

We do not live in an ideal world and while most young men are honourable some are not and it's difficult enough to tell the difference sober without being smashed out of your mind.

hazel

[Bago]

But what your saying is no one lies to the law. I am sure there have been cases of people changing their minds, either through forgiveness, Stupidity or both. If a girl has been genuinely raped then the whole case being brought to light in the media etc would be agaonising. If, however the case is some kind of revenge then the true humiliation is not there.

Yes, if we presume that no-one lies. However, in these cases, there is the "accidental rape", and then there is the "rape with intent". It's clear to me that if a guy wishes to rape a girl under all circumstances, he will do it. What is apparent that such grey cases that never is truly defined are the ones whereby the girl is not certain of wanting to prosecute. Yet, she felt raped under the circumstances.

 

I actually find what you are saying very enlightening, but you also forgot to note that, yes, some women when they are raped felt personally responsible. Cos I am sure that they will feel guilty for not protecting themselves better. As I am sure that there are hundreds upon hundreds of judgements by Joe Blogg to say that, don't do this unless you will endanger yourself etc etc. Can you say that the guilt felt by the individual to push the case forward is not one of self doubt, and self judgement of the situation, than it is shame from lying?

 

We all know that being raped is nothing to be ashamed of.

I actually find this sentence somewhat reassuring, but yet fascinated. I didn't know how some females feel, but I recall reading from some of the charities website about feeling guilty, and becoming introverted from the experience. Even though I haven't been in such unfortunate incidences, I can actually relate to that emotion. I don't know if you realise the complex emotion from the female depending on her age, and on her sexual development that, it can affect her different ways. This thread's "victim" is only 18.

 

I guess my point is, some victims DO feel ashamed of it.

 

There are people that are reading this thread that would say 'If it happened to me i'd make sure the ******* did time'. These women are confident and can hold there own and in normal circumstances would. After a rape has occured however, every bit of self confidence and self worth has been drained from them. It is this that causes the woman to be ashamed and to not pursue a conviction.If, however the whole thing is a lie then there was nothing to kill every bit of drive in the girl.

Yes, I agree with you that some women reading this thread would actually drum up the courage and say such things. These women can hold their own when in an environment that they do not feel threatened in. Yes. I also agree with you that women can and do feel vulnerable at times, and if such things happened to individual females, it may affect them differently. Surely, you cannot just say that, those who feel ashamed of it won't ever bring the case forward and actually prosecute the guy.

 

I suppose what im trying to say is, a liar would not be putting her self through shame as the shame is wrongly brought upon by the events that occured.

I also hope that you are not saying that those who DO bring cases forward are the ones that are doing it with malicious intent. The female could have moral and emotional support which back her decision in such cases, how do Joe Public really know?

 

So is it okay then, maybe for the female victim in questions to actually leave the case for a while and bring it to the fore when se felt ready emotionally ?