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Why can't men settle for being friends with a woman without there having to be sex?


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Not true. If you are attractive (to him) then he'll find it h - difficult.

 

What is it with this female obession with "testing" men like this? If there is nothing sexual in it then why would none of the women I know be happy for their bloke to sleep with a female "buddy"?

 

The whole idea is to find a buddy who doesn't see me as sexually attractive or it won't work

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Ah, we're back on air!

 

Why would you think that.....and why would they be my friends if they thought I was scarey? :confused:

 

just a guess that perhaps the mixed messages you have gotten in the past, may be due to the fact that you may be sending mixed messages yourself, don't ask me why perhaps intuition, but you strike me as a very experienced and persuasive man, and that could be scary to some women, enlighten me:)

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definition of platonic relationship

 

Woman's definition - A friend of the opposite sex you are not having sex with

 

Man's definition - A friend of the opposite sex you are not having sex with ....

 

 

 

 

yet. :hihi:

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definition of platonic relationship

 

Woman's definition - A friend of the opposite sex you are not having sex with

 

Man's definition - A friend of the opposite sex you are not having sex with ....

 

 

 

 

yet. :hihi:

 

so are you saying that the only safe men that women can, say, cuddle up to are gay men?

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This is before any idea of attraction has been noted, you start off getting on well, and say to him do you think we could become buddies (he must know what that means) if he says no you're a very attractive woman (which has been said to me) then it's off

 

It sounds like you want absolute guarantees on where a relationship is going before it really starts, Cressida. I can understand why you might want this - but I don't think it's a realistic expectation. Relationships don't seem to work like that. Neither party can know in advance where exactly a relationship is going, or what feelings each will develop for the other. A relationship - whether a love relationship or a friendship - is a dynamic thing that neither person can fully control.

 

If it concerns you that a male friend might find it hard to respect the boundaries that are obviously very important to you in a friendship, perhaps it might work out better for you if you restricted your male friends to gay males, so there is no room for confusion?

 

StarSparkle

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It sounds like you want absolute guarantees on where a relationship is going before it really starts, Cressida. I can understand why you might want this - but I don't think it's a realistic expectation. Relationships don't seem to work like that. Neither party can know in advance where exactly a relationship is going, or what feelings each will develop for the other. A relationship - whether a love relationship or a friendship - is a dynamic thing that neither person can fully control.

 

If it concerns you that a male friend might find it hard to respect the boundaries that are obviously very important to you in a friendship, perhaps it might work out better for you if you restricted your male friends to gay males, so there is no room for confusion?

 

StarSparkle

 

 

 

I'ts not that deep, just curious

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